Hi ladies, it's time for Sunday steps again. For those of you who are new, I'm very sorry for your loss. Every Sunday we post the steps we've taken during the week towards healing.
My step: yesterday I took out my "What to Expect" book out of hiding and read the chapter on MC's. Before that, I hadn't been able to look at any of the baby related items I had bought before we found out. I cried my way though it, but just the fact that I could pick it up and look at it was a big step for me.
Re: Sunday Steps
GOOD STEP KJsbabe!!
Mine would be ... Joining TTCAL and considering charting. It scares the crap out of me and kinda grosses me out. So, since we are still TTA I am in the "research phase". (thank goodness)
Good step! I did not realized that they had a miscarriage section because sadly I never got to finish the book. But my step would also be joinig TTCAL (even though I am TTA). This week I took another HUGE step. I emailed two of my friends that I have been avoiding. I have been hanging out with everyone but them. One of them is due a few weeks before I was due, and the other one just had a baby girl in November. Since I had a baby girl I have been having a hard time talking to her.
So I emailed them apologizing for avoiding them. And I let them know that I still loved them but needed time to deal with my loss. And told my friend who is pregnant that I cant promise that I will be at her baby shower or be there when she deliver, but it is not because I don't love her but just being around her brings of memories of my loss.
5/9/2013 = Our rainbow was born!!
08/18/2012 - BFP (Hoping this is our rainbow!)
06/24/2012 - Loss confirmed at 12 weeks
12/14/2010 - Loss baby girl at 20 weeks due to Turner Syndrome
01/2009 - Chemical Pregnancy
My Blog
Congrats Ladies on those steps! Reading other people's steps helps me feel inspired to do the same!
However, I feel like this week was a little set back for me. I am still better than the first week, but I just feel a little off this week. I think finding out that my best friend is TTC stung a little bit. I should be excited for her, right? And for some reason, feeling jealous is making me feel guilty and horrible.
Anyway, on to my steps. I had to attend a training for my work on Saturday and the topic was Emotional Development for babies and toddlers. My role was to be there as an administrator to make sure that the person running the workshop was doing everything that she was supposed to do. I only got "teary eyed" in a few of the segments and made it through the whole training!
BFP#1 11.19.10 Missed MC 01.10.11 Sam & Alex
BFP#2 05.08.11 Birthday 1.11.12 Peyton
BFP#3 06.10.12 Birthday 2.14.13-Cooper
Congrats to my buddy Ambs21! Welcome to the world Audrey!
Congrats to my buddy Mork! Welcome sweet E!
I have been doing much better this week. On Friday, I held it together really well when I was out with a group and a girl announced her pregnancy. Today, I called my old roommate (one of my best friends) and told her I had been pg and had a m/c. It felt so good to talk to her about it.
I also started charting again last week, I O'd a few days ago, and I'm really starting to look forward to TTC again.
PGAL/PAL Always Welcome
Wow, so many have been taking such great steps! I am proud of everyone on here, even if you don't feel like you took a step this week; You are getting through little by little, day-by-day and for that I am proud of everyone on here!
Finally after weeks of waiting it out, my OB cleared me for taking the next steps... so I started on Cytotec last night. Kinda pushed everything into reality. I have known for weeks that I miscarried, but I think I have kind of been in denial... that at some point the u/s would magically show a baby, that this had all been a terrible mistake. So I guess my step this week has been taking the Cytotec and getting this m/c started and facing my reality...
sounds silly but I got up and put earrings in....a small step but thats all i can muster up.
DC#2 born silent at 22 weeks 1.11.11
Dc#3 born vbac 1/2012 <bra DC#4 born VBAC 3/2014
BFP #2 11/3/10; BO at u/s 10w6d 12/16/10; Natural MC 1/7/11; D&C 4/21/11
BFP #3 10/27/11 Please stick, LO!! 2/6/12 It's a Girl! Alexis Grace born 6/29/12
BFP#4 4/27/14 Stick, stick, stick!! 8/11/14 It's a Boy! Evan Wesley born 1/8/15
"Patience is waiting. Not passively waiting. That is laziness. But to keep going when the going is hard and slow, that is patience." Let it Be (blog) ♥ My BFP Charts
This time I'm not leaving without you.