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How much do you "hang out" with LO vs. "teach/actively engage with toys or games&quot

Nicole.Nicole.
in Success after IF

I've been thinking a lot about this lately.  I'm a SAHM so I'm with Jake all day.  We stay pretty active- going to the library, music class, children's museum, play dates, etc. a few times a week.  When we're home and he's awake I probably spend 90% of my time engaging him.  Meaning, I'm reading to him, playing with him with toys, showing him things, etc.   I also make sure that I allow time for him to play alone which he's really good at.  (He also takes a long nap from 1-4 everyday so I often clean up around the house and get some down time.)

DH is really involved and active in helping with Jake when he's home- but I feel like DH does a lot more "hanging out" with Jake than interacting with him with toys.  (For example- Jake and DH are hanging out on the couch right now and Jake is just climbing all over him, having a blast).  

I don't know why, but I feel this NEED to constantly be entertaining him and teaching him things.  DH is perfectly content just being with him.  I know the answer is that there needs to be a balance, but I have a hard time finding it for myself.  Does anyone else feel this way?

Thanks for reading if you got this far Wink

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Re: How much do you "hang out" with LO vs. "teach/actively engage with toys or games&quot

  • dana316dana316 member

    I feel pretty much exactly the opposite of you, lol.

    I feel like I don't spend ENOUGH time teaching her things, and too much time hanging out.  She is very independent, and wants to play alone a lot of the time...and she won't sit still for me to read a book to her (she's too busy ripping it out of my hands to play with it).

    I guess I keep hoping that as she gets older, she'll start letting me read to her, and that her attention span will get longer and I can teach her more things. 

    Right now?  Nah, we just pretty much hang out.

     

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  • TwoStrongTwoStrong
    Honestly, even when you are just hanging out with him he is learning! All experiences are so meaningful to his development at this time. It sounds like you do so much with him each day that you can use a few days here or there of just play. But considering the question of hanging out vs. teaching...I consider it teaching moments when we are at our children's museum but really he is just playing...at Christmas time we made cookies and he was so involved and so into it so that was playing and learning. Hey, I guess I do what you do too. I am often doing these things with him while DH lets him climb on him and all of that.  But DH also reads books and plays games with him. You have asked a good question. Sorry if I am rambling but DS is asking me a bunch of questions at the moment!
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  • TheSkimmyTheSkimmy member
    I don't if DH has ever talked about the abc's. I do the engaging activities and he does more of the play- running, ball etc. But I get the fun daytime activities that he doesn't so it evens out.
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    Married 8.13.2005, M/C 12/8/06- 5 weeks, M/C 2/27/07- 7 weeks, M/C w/ D&C 8/10/09-6.5 weeks *Charles Lawrence born 5/2/08 @ 3:14am, 7lb 8oz, 20.5 inches. Clomid, Crinone and baby aspirin. *Alexandra Claire born 9/14/10 @ 9:52am 6lb 14oz, 20.5 inches. Femara, Crinone and baby aspirin. Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
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  • MayDayGirlMayDayGirl member
    imagedana316:

    I feel pretty much exactly the opposite of you, lol.

    I feel like I don't spend ENOUGH time teaching her things, and too much time hanging out.  She is very independent,

     

    ditto.

    Of course I read to him and teach him things, but I watch him play a ton.

    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • GreenEyedGalGreenEyedGal member
    imageMayDayGirl:
    imagedana316:

    I feel pretty much exactly the opposite of you, lol.

    I feel like I don't spend ENOUGH time teaching her things, and too much time hanging out.  She is very independent,

     

    ditto.

    Of course I read to him and teach him things, but I watch him play a ton.

    Same here.

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