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How much notice?

flutepharm87flutepharm87 member
in Baby Showers

First of all, I don't want to seem ungrateful or selfish or gift-grabby with this post. My mom decided that she really wanted to throw me a shower for our boys and that's great. She decided to have it on February 20th. Again, not a problem. The problem is the invites. My mom STILL hasn't sent them out.

Now, she asked me for a guest list around Christmas and I'll admit that it took me a few weeks to get a hold of everyone for their addresses. But she's been sitting this for about 2 1/2 weeks now. She "claims" she's sending out invitations today, but she's said that before.

I'm trying not to be a nag. And I know it's not really my place to "take over" any part of the shower planning. It's just that I know that people work. Some people work weekends. Some people make plans with friends and family over the weekends since they work during the week. A similar situation happened with my bridal shower, where invites went out with little notice and the turnout was terrible.

I just don't want her to be expecting all these people and rent the space for that many people (my guest list is about 35 people) only to have very few show due to little notice. And it's really not about the gifts. It's about the fact that a lot of the people came to me asking if I was having a shower so they could ask for time off and I had no date to give them (because mom didn't even rent the space/decide on a date until last week).

Anyway, should I post something on facebook about it? Should I call everyone? Should I make my mom call people? Or should I just sit back and let what happens happen? I'm just not sure if there's anything I can or should do at this point. Any advice is appreciated! 

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Re: How much notice?

  • CortsCorts member
    Usually a month is the norm, unless people are traveling far. She really needs to get them out ASAP. Maybe you can offer to address the envelopes for her?
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  • MidwestGidgetMidwestGidget member
    For all of your above stated reasons (which are completely legit!), if it were me, I would send out a PRIVATE message or invite to your guests on facebook, as more of a "heads-up" post. Kind of a Save the Date for a shower if you will. That way people will know to expect an invitation, or at least what date the shower is planned for.
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  • carishabobcarishabob member

    imageMidwestGidget:
    For all of your above stated reasons (which are completely legit!), if it were me, I would send out a PRIVATE message or invite to your guests on facebook, as more of a "heads-up" post. Kind of a Save the Date for a shower if you will. That way people will know to expect an invitation, or at least what date the shower is planned for.

    I think this is what I'd do if it were me!

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  • OctoberCAPAOctoberCAPA member

    I'm so sorry about this--I'd feel the same way.  I think contact is okay--private message on FB, phone call, email, whatever--and just let people know the date and that the invitation is forthcoming.  Especially the people who have asked you for a date.  I might be hesitant to contact people who would turn around and ask your mom what's going on--I wouldn't want her to know I was going behind her back to do this.

    I'd also get over there and help address envelopes and put on stamps.

    Good luck!

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  • Yellow_DaisyYellow_Daisy

    I personally wouldn't facebook or send an email about the shower to anyone except those that have asked.  I think it would seem weird and a tad tacky to send it to people who haven't.

    For those that have asked I would just email them and say my mom just let me know that the shower is going to be on Feb 20th.  I wanted to let you know since you had asked me about it earlier.  I hope you will be able to make it.

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  • ascar29ascar29

    my shower is on 2.20 too and my mom sent out the invites on 1.19 and i litterly got txt from like 25 people the next day about how cute they were! I was so shocked that people got them so fast! And I know the rest of the people had gotten them by the next day and everyone lived outside of the town my mom lives in.. So i wouldnt worry about it to much if she really sent them out today. Maybe you can offer to go over and help her address them if she didnt send them out, and just make sure you have a good rsvp date, not like the day before the party. My mom had regrets only just because its at her house and its more like a party then a sit down thing.

     

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