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Success after IF
Postpartum emotions - any suggestions?
My trips are 3 1/2 weeks, they're doing really well and I've been lucky enough to have plenty of help around the house. I'm not doing as well, I'm finding myself very stressed out. I wouldn't go so far as to say I'm depressed but I'm just worried all the time. I'm worried about failing at BFing, the constant snowstorms we've been getting, extra expenses hitting us while I'm not working, DH leaving me to go to grad school and back to work, etc, etc.
I have help at night so I can sleep but I barely do sleep, I just stew and worry. I'm exhausting myself by not taking advantage of our night help and constantly worrying. This is all so very hard, any suggestions on relaxing and getting my head back in the game? I so want to be a relaxed happy mommy enjoying this time.
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Re: Postpartum emotions - any suggestions?
PPD doesn't have to mean you feel depressed. PPA (post partum anxiety) is very common, especially for someone who has three babies to care for.
Please don't hesitate to ask for help from your OB or doc. There is nothing to be ashamed of and PPD/PPA doesn't make you a bad mom.
I just have to tell myself it will be OKAY.....lots of people do this, you can do it. You are responsible and planned for these babies - lots of people handle more kids and are not nearly as responsible. I also worry a lot about money - that we aren't saving as much since I quit working - but I also have to tell myself that I need to live life and not just put everything off (we put off having a baby till we graduated grad school, got jobs, got a house etc and we don't live extravagantly, don't take vacations etc)- having a baby and staying home with her is part of life, even if it means our savings rate goes down a bit...
maybe a relaxation ritual that works for you like a nice hot bath every night with a glass of wine?
Breastfeeding sucked for me too and I still have supply issues....I just realized it was best to give her as much as I could and supplement as necessary.....it wasn't worth the stress to ebf if I couldn't.
The only fix for me was to go back on Paxil, which I did at my 6 week pp visit. I was anxious, and depressed, and quite honestly a b*tch on wheels to all but Sophia. The meds helped tremendously.
Good luck. I know how hard it was for me, so I honestly can't imagine your struggles with three. Hang in there:)
Just wanted to give you a big ((HUG)), Monty! I can't imagine the craziness of dealing with three - and I'm sure you are doing a great job.
I agree with pp'er that you should mention this to your doctor. I know many ladies who have felt a ton better with a little intervention. Hope this passes quickly for you and you can begin to enjoy your precious boys more and more each day.
ditto meds for anxiety (zoloft was and still is my BFF). also try to get out of the house by yourself every so often. A quick run to the grocery store often helped to restore my sanity and make me able to deal with the babies better. so did lots of chocolate.
hang in there!
I would talk to your doc and see what he/she says. I agree with lnle, I find myself going stir crazy when I don't get to leave the house for days on end. If you can, maybe get some Ambien to take one night that you know you don't have to get up to take care of the babies. You need to get some sleep!
Hang in there...
Also, have you joined a multiples group in your area? My group has been amazing!! They bring us dinners, formula, etc. You might want to look into that as well. I don't feel nearly as stressed about money because we have had so many donations of formula.
As for breast feeding, I did it for 6 weeks (I actually just pumped) and it was so stressful for me that I cried every time I thought about the next time. I had major supply issues though. My babies are doing great on formula so if you can't EBF, it's OK!!
Oh, honey....
What you are going through sounds very similar to what I went through. It was summer, R was home with me and I had people falling all over themselves to help me and I was a big ball of anxiety. I was not at all depressed, but the anxiety was maddening. All I did was worry. And it got worse as the day went on. I am telling you, I do not think I slept a wink for the first 3 weeks - seriously. R finally said something to me and expressed how worried he was - particularly about the sleep.
I finally called my OB and went on a low dosage of Zoloft. It was a LIFESAVER. You and I have had some of the same crosses to bear in life- so I know we could probably really recognize sadness and mild depression- but this anxiety was something new and it was totally kicking my ass. I am just now weaning off the zoloft. I could've come off of it earlier, truth be told, but I wanted to get over the hump of going back to work.
I am home today ( stupid snowday) if you at all want to chat call/text me. Even if not today- whenever.
XO
These hit me the day after we got home from hosptial - so about 5 days after my c-section.
I cried a lot, worried about money, stressed about change of lifestyle and worried about how the heck I was supposed to take care of two 5 lbs babies. It was very scary to me. Its like my emotions grabbed hold of my entire body and I couldnt control myself. DH called my OB after 3 days of constant crying and anxiety (i wasnt even able to make the call), and they put me on Zoloft. I am not sure if it was the Zoloft or my hormones regulating - but I felt better in a few days (it worked quick for me) and was on it for about a month.
I have a feel though, once I head back to work - I will need to start it up again.
cabin fever and new triplets! what a combination! hats off to monty!
like pp said, I'd speak with your doctor about this. you have a TON on your plate and he/she may have some good suggestions. in any case, you're ARE doing awesome and you're my hero.
2 infertiles' journey to 2 pink lines (and a baby girl)
"our IF story"
((hugs)) I know everyone says it, but it does get better. You're in the most difficult stage right now.