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Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss
Is it really a loss?....blighted ovum
This is a duplicate post that I put up in the "Success after a Loss" board, but I wanted some opinions here too 
Thanks for reading..
So I know this might sound weird b/c the loss felt so significant and I still get sad about it. But at the last visit for THIS baby the US tech asked about the miscarriage I had in May and I told him we never actually saw the baby and that I miscarried at week 7. So he said it was possibly a blighted ovum where a baby never forms.
So now I feel like my feelings of loss aren't valid anymore because even though we thought we were having a baby for those 4 weeks after the BFP there may have never actually been a baby....
It leaves me feeling conflicted. It's easier to think that there never was a baby and it makes it less sad and more medical. But at the same time we were SOOOO excited and I definately feel like we lost a "baby".
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Is it really a loss?....blighted ovum
Your conflicted feelings make total sense. At my first u/s at 8w, there were 2 empty sacs-- a double BO. It was strange to know that I had been making all these plans, talking to and being so excited over "nothing," but in reality it wasn't "nothing." I still feel such a loss, and sometimes feel so silly because I was never actually pregnant with a living baby (or babies in my case). For me, that sense of loss is for what could have been, and that is what is hard to get past sometimes.
Your feelings of loss are completely valid because it is how you feel...
Your feelings are totally legitimate. I had a BO too, and was told that even if you never saw the baby, one could have started to form and then "disintegrated" as my doctor said. I found this article earlier today about BO. Read it...it says that you were just as pregnant as anyone else at one stage in time, and you have every right to mourn your loss.
https://www.misdiagnosedmiscarriage.com/blightedovum.html
It is definately a loss, just a different kind...or a specific kind. My 2nd m/c was a bo and I honestly was ok with it...I think knowing that no embryo was ever present was what helped me get through that one. This last one just SUCKED. It never had a heartbeat.
I am so sorry for your loss
Rose
3 m/c's
Yes, it's definately a loss. ?I understand your conflicted feelings, as I feel them as well. ?We were so excited to be expecting, and I was having all the early pregnancy symptoms. ?My internet readings have been slightly conflicted. ?Some say there never was an embryo, others say there was. ?I had an ultrasound at 5w3d, and while it was too early for a heartbeat, there was something in the sac. ?Then to our sadness, it was gone. ?I don't think you should discount your feelings of loss. ?They are normal and to be expected. ?
?I wish you a happy and healthy pregnancy. ?It gives me hope for the future!! ??
Jacob Alexander 7/23/09
Allergic to Dairy, Eggs and Peanuts
Jameson Adam 6/1/11
Allergic to Peas...so far