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Success after IF
DavezWife
member
IVF, "deadly"? Mother, "BSC"?
DavezWife
member
I'll spare you the long drama, but basically I ask of you sensible women:
1. As far as my feeble mind understands, the risks of IVF are as follows: infection during ER/ET, OHSS, and pregnacy (and related issues) itself. Right? Would one consider IVF "deadly" and fear for someone's life over it?
2. If your mother, who has never text'd you in her life, is suddenly text'ing your fragile and very BUSY husband behind your back, and then CALLING him when she knows you're busy, only to lay on him irrational fears about HERself, crying about HER life stressors and what SHE needs (while all the while giving said nervous-nelly husband too much to think about when his wife is already walking a thin line....) would that tick you off at all? You know, maybe come to you as an irritant, or oh, say. SIGN THAT YOUR MOTHER IS BATCHITFECKINGCRAZY?!!!
Davez and I are going to finish up this baby-making stuff and go off the grid with the kids here in a few years. I am soooooooooooooo not going to be the one who stays in town and takes care of my parents. Just sayin.
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"I did it for Cricket"
This discussion has been closed.
Re: IVF, "deadly"? Mother, "BSC"?
1. yeah fairly routine - standard risks
2. she needs to check herself. ugh. energy suckers suck.
Ahhh, is your mom making your experience all about her? My mom invented that routine, I think. It's why I stopped talking to her about IVF - she managed to make even that about her. (Then again, this is a woman who, in seriousness, said that my wedding was not about me - but about her).
I feel ya. Sorry you have a crazycakes mom too.
I am a runner, knitter, scientist, DE-IVF veteran, and stage III colon cancer survivor.
BSC.
No doubt.
Sorry, Hon.
You've got enough on your plate without relative/Mom issues.
This is why I live VERY far away from my mom!!!
My main goal in life is to not have my children thing the same of me when they're older.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
As a sane person, I would *not* consider IVF deadly... as was explained to me by not only my old RE, but my childhood best friend (now a doctor), way back in the day (think late 70s when they were just pioneering this stuff), either IVF was thought to be deadly, or the drugs actually did kill one or two people during the trials. However, significant medical advances have been made in the last 30 years.
Unfortunately, you can't fix stupid or self-righteous, and I'm aware of some anti-IVF conservative groups/individuals (such as a very outspoken devout Catholic doctor local to my metro area) who continue to spread the lies that "IVF kills women." Anything to make other people look bad I guess.
So I am very sorry that someone was rude enough to say that to you, but they are totally full of shiit.
Just like your mom is.
**back to lurkdom**
1. I don't think I've every heard of IVF being deadly. Who said deadly?
2. That's ridiculous. I'm sorry
I don't blame you one bit.
sorry, wasn't clear. My mother is convinced that I should have died by now, and even the MENTION of possibly doing it again, sent her into a frenzy that I would surely croke if I did so.
My poor dad is set for one knee replacement, and then in efforts to "trim up" and get ready for the surgery, went and blasted his shoulder and now needs rotator cuff surgery too. (le sigh) Throw in my drama, and my brothers off doing their own thing, and nobody, gasp, nobody, is paying attention to Grandmum Drama Queen.
Forgive me while I bow, kiss her ring, and SHOVE IT UP HER ARSE!
(we've never been close, she's always been narcassistic, this is nothing new. But this sneaky chit was eating Davez alive for DAYS, and that gets my goat. Plus she's refusing to babysit Ava for some SUPER important meetings Davez and I need to be at. For no reason other than "she's overwelmed." Gimmee a break. Honey, somewhere out there, someone's having a chittier day than you. get over it.)
ok, thanks. I feel better. lol.
glass of cab franc, anyone?
Just to play devil's advocate, I don't think it's unreasonable when someone is truly worried about a loved one and fears said loved one won't hear their concerns to go to their spouse. Think of how many times someone here has asked for advice about approaching a sister/friend to tell them they were worried about PPD or whatever - don't a few people always suggest going to the husband to help decide what to do next?
Not saying that's what's going on in this situation - maybe her concern isn't genuine, maybe she's just a drama queen - but I don't think going to your husband in and of itself is a terrible offense.
Amber
TTC since March '06
MFI, LPD, possible PCOS
3 chem pgs * m/c identical twins at 9w 10.06
IVF w/ICSI #2 - beta - 187! (9dp5dt), beta - 367! (11dp5dt)
IVF w/ICSI #3 - it's a girl!
My IF Blog: Between the Lines
My Parenting Blog: Letters From Your Mama
I agree, and don't mind the other side of looking at things, had we not just spent 5 hours there Sat. eve, having what I thought was a nice dinner, good conversation, and a "lay it on the table" of what's going on with us, where we're at, etc.
(we don't share a TON with them, but we did stray to a fairly open place with them as I was cranked and Davez was tipsy. lol)
I've never ever believed ANY of her concern to be genuine. There's always underlying motives with that lady. sniff. But like I said, *I* am used to it. Leave my husband out of it.
I know where there's a good bunker...