well i called

triplea1819 · January 2011

I called my mental health program through my work. she is referring me to psychiatrist. Since DD is over 3 months and I am still feeling awful.

I am so afraid I am going to hurt her. Her colic is not going away, because her reflux is not getting any better. I am basically at the point where she is in the crib asleep or playing with toys, or on her playmat playing with toys until her next nap and I put her down. I can barely even look at her. i feel awful about it, but I feel like if I hold her and she starts with her colicky fit, I do not know what I will do anymore.

i have no family in the area, DH works 7-4, and all my friends work out of the house. so I am alone all day with her. I feel even worse for my son, because I used to tell him when he smiles he makes me happy. So now all day long he comes up to me and just smiles at me.

monkiem · January 2011

Good luck and hugs....

jamiemsmith · January 2011

I'm glad you called, I know it's very difficult for you to be feeling this way. I hope you find some help with the psychiatrist. ::hugs::

CherryStarburst · January 2011

oh, I'm so sorry you're feeling this way! I hope you are able to find the help you need, good for you for making the call.

rlyttle · January 2011

I'm so glad you have reached out to someone! Have you looking into Moms groups around your area? Sounds like getting out of the house during the day and connecting with some other moms will also help you. Hang in there Momma!!!

KoalaBear103 · January 2011

I am so glad you are going to get the help you need. I have no advice, just wanted to offer hugs and say that I'm glad you are acknowledging there is a problem and getting help.

jessakris · January 2011

Congrats. It's so hard to make that first step. Just think, you're that much closer now to feeling better for yourself and for your family. Good luck and big hugs!

trarenee13 · January 2011

I'm so very glad that you called. Hopefully the psychiatrist can get you in soon. You have really done the hardest part, saying that there is something wrong and making that first call. Remember that we are all here for support. Good luck.

triplea1819 · January 2011

rlyttle:
I'm so glad you have reached out to someone! Have you looking into Moms groups around your area? Sounds like getting out of the house during the day and connecting with some other moms will also help you. Hang in there Momma!!!

i belong to the local MOMS club, but I can not attend anymore due to times. I work from home and work is super busy. I used to be active and did a lot with my son, but now with running him around to school, speech therapy, DD weekly drs appts due to her GI issues, work, I can not go to anything.

SuperThat1006 · January 2011

You are a wonderful mother for calling. I hope you get better soon!

SnoopyLuv · January 2011

I am also glad you called. My PPD manifests as anger and I too was afraid I would eventually pick her up too roughly or whatever because I would get so mad when she cried and she wasn't even colicky.

The meds help so much, it is night and day for me. I hope you have the same experience and get some relief from feeling this way too.

BC&MM · January 2011

Good luck. Relux is a bad thing......just ask me.

Diva416 · January 2011

I'm so glad you called! Post partum depression is very real! Hopefully the doctor will get you on a medication that helps. I had to go on Zoloft a couple weeks after DD was born, because all I did all day was cry. I was always imagining the horrible things that could happen and that I could do accidentally that would hurt DD, that I was afraid to hold her at times. The meds take about a week to build up in your system (2 weeks until full effect, but you should notice come improvement within a week). It helped me a lot! I'm still on the Zoloft, as now I feel fairly sane again! Now I love my time with DD - even after she has kept me up all night! (((hugs)))

Diva416 · January 2011

tried to correct my typo, but it wouldn't let me..."come"="some"...

KJmashup · January 2011

You are very strong for doing this. I hope you get the help you need.

Laura_Lee · January 2011

SnoopyLuv:

I am also glad you called. My PPD manifests as anger and I too was afraid I would eventually pick her up too roughly or whatever because I would get so mad when she cried and she wasn't even colicky.

The meds help so much, it is night and day for me. I hope you have the same experience and get some relief from feeling this way too.

This exactly. I decided about a month ago to "wean" off my medication (Wellbutrin XL). After about 2 weeks, I couldn't believe the person I'd become already and went back on it immediately. Prior to accepting medication, I'd always looked at depressed people as "failures," myself included. I finally came to the conclusion that I would only be a failure if I let myself continue the way I was without seeking help. It takes a great amount of courage and strength to admit you need help, and to seek it out. It doesn't make you nuts. It doesn't make you a bad mother. It doesn't make you a failure. It makes you a person who like many others, needs help adjusting to the drastic emotional, hormonal, and physical changes which take place after bringing a child into the world.

I'm so glad you're going to meet with someone. As hard as it might be right now, have hope. It will get better, and you've already taken the 1st and hardest step!

triplea1819 · January 2011

Laura_Lee:
SnoopyLuv:

I am also glad you called. My PPD manifests as anger and I too was afraid I would eventually pick her up too roughly or whatever because I would get so mad when she cried and she wasn't even colicky.

The meds help so much, it is night and day for me. I hope you have the same experience and get some relief from feeling this way too.

This exactly. I decided about a month ago to "wean" off my medication (Wellbutrin XL). After about 2 weeks, I couldn't believe the person I'd become already and went back on it immediately. Prior to accepting medication, I'd always looked at depressed people as "failures," myself included. I finally came to the conclusion that I would only be a failure if I let myself continue the way I was without seeking help. It takes a great amount of courage and strength to admit you need help, and to seek it out. It doesn't make you nuts. It doesn't make you a bad mother. It doesn't make you a failure. It makes you a person who like many others, needs help adjusting to the drastic emotional, hormonal, and physical changes which take place after bringing a child into the world.

I'm so glad you're going to meet with someone. As hard as it might be right now, have hope. It will get better, and you've already taken the 1st and hardest step!

I told my husband I feel like a failure every day. The house is a mess. I barely cook dinner. I can barely take care of my kids without yelling and screaming at them. I cry all day long. I do not even want to be with myself, let alone having other people around me. I am failing at parenting, being a wife, taking care of the house, my work. failing at every thing..

KoalaBear103 · January 2011

triplea1819:
Laura_Lee:
SnoopyLuv:

I am also glad you called. My PPD manifests as anger and I too was afraid I would eventually pick her up too roughly or whatever because I would get so mad when she cried and she wasn't even colicky.

The meds help so much, it is night and day for me. I hope you have the same experience and get some relief from feeling this way too.

This exactly. I decided about a month ago to "wean" off my medication (Wellbutrin XL). After about 2 weeks, I couldn't believe the person I'd become already and went back on it immediately. Prior to accepting medication, I'd always looked at depressed people as "failures," myself included. I finally came to the conclusion that I would only be a failure if I let myself continue the way I was without seeking help. It takes a great amount of courage and strength to admit you need help, and to seek it out. It doesn't make you nuts. It doesn't make you a bad mother. It doesn't make you a failure. It makes you a person who like many others, needs help adjusting to the drastic emotional, hormonal, and physical changes which take place after bringing a child into the world.

I'm so glad you're going to meet with someone. As hard as it might be right now, have hope. It will get better, and you've already taken the 1st and hardest step!

I told my husband I feel like a failure every day. The house is a mess. I barely cook dinner. I can barely take care of my kids without yelling and screaming at them. I cry all day long. I do not even want to be with myself, let alone having other people around me. I am failing at parenting, being a wife, taking care of the house, my work. failing at every thing..

You are doing what you need to get help-that is not failing!! I am so sorry you are dealing with this.

BC&MM · January 2011

triplea1819:
Laura_Lee:
SnoopyLuv:

I am also glad you called. My PPD manifests as anger and I too was afraid I would eventually pick her up too roughly or whatever because I would get so mad when she cried and she wasn't even colicky.

The meds help so much, it is night and day for me. I hope you have the same experience and get some relief from feeling this way too.

This exactly. I decided about a month ago to "wean" off my medication (Wellbutrin XL). After about 2 weeks, I couldn't believe the person I'd become already and went back on it immediately. Prior to accepting medication, I'd always looked at depressed people as "failures," myself included. I finally came to the conclusion that I would only be a failure if I let myself continue the way I was without seeking help. It takes a great amount of courage and strength to admit you need help, and to seek it out. It doesn't make you nuts. It doesn't make you a bad mother. It doesn't make you a failure. It makes you a person who like many others, needs help adjusting to the drastic emotional, hormonal, and physical changes which take place after bringing a child into the world.

I'm so glad you're going to meet with someone. As hard as it might be right now, have hope. It will get better, and you've already taken the 1st and hardest step!

I told my husband I feel like a failure every day. The house is a mess. I barely cook dinner. I can barely take care of my kids without yelling and screaming at them. I cry all day long. I do not even want to be with myself, let alone having other people around me. I am failing at parenting, being a wife, taking care of the house, my work. failing at every thing..

Do understand life is different with another kid. I feel like I fail daily. What I learned is I needed to lower my expectations of what I needed to do during the daily. If I made a list of what I needed to do and the baby messed it up, I was angry and upset. NOW I try to realize, my main job is to take care of the baby and if I get to clean or other stuff, it was a benefit.

Diva416 · January 2011

You are NOT a failure! The fact that you're asking for help shows you are aware of the concerns and willing to work on them. This is the opposite of failing. If you continued down this path, staying in a depressed state and therefore not being able to be there for your kids and not trying to take care of yourself, THAT would be poor parenting choices. You are making the BEST choice and being a FABULOUS mom by asking for help now before it gets any worse, so that you can feel your best and therefore have a good relationship with your children. Asking for help in this situation is something to be very proud of! I'm so sorry you are going through this, but I am so glad you recognize it and are getting help!!!

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