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TTC After a Loss
karma79
member
Today would have been the day
karma79
member
Sorry I keep posting about this, hopefully tomorrow I will move on.
Today was the day I was suppose to have my first child - don't know if it would have been a boy or a girl - I think boy since when we were pg we called my stomach "Kevin" - a name I can't even speak and it's even hard to type. So in my head I think that I should be having the most incredible day of my life - seeing and holding our baby for the first time, resting at a hospital til it's time to take the baby home to the "baby's room" not the "nothing room"... I had a real bad night last night. We keep the door to that room closed, it's mainly just storage right now. But on my way to bed I looked at the door and imagined what it could have been and then my world turned upside down and DH had to listen to me rant thru my tears. It sucks. So instead of having the best time of my life, I guess I will do some work now.
F this day.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Today would have been the day
BFP #1 6.17.10 - natural M/C 5w2d
BFP #2 8.4.10 - missed M/C, D&C 8w
BFP #3 1.18.11 - natural M/C 5w1d
BFP #4 5.6.11 - 13dpo: hcg 68, p 16.3; 16dpo: hcg 211,
p16.6; 18dpo: hcg 416, p 15.6; 25dpo: hcg 6,007
DS born 1/30/12
BFP #5 4.28.13 - LO due 1/4/14
Dx with Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome (APS)
BFP #4 5/14/12
5/17/12...1st Betas- 176, P4 3.6
5/22/12...2nd Betas- 207, P4 6.1 (MC confirmed)
TTC since 5/2010
DX with Diminished Ovarian Reserve - AMH of 1.1 - 7/2011; AMH of .42 8/2012BFP 9/1/10-M/C confirmed 9/8/10-Methotrexate 10/6/10
IUI #1 (w/clomid)-9/5/11-BFN ; IUI #2 (w/clomid)-10/5/11 - BFP - 11/1/12-No sac seen; 11/2/11 and 11/9/11-Methotrexate
IVF #1- ER 2/2; ET 2/5;-Two 8 cell embryos transfered = BFFN
Surprise BFP - 5/7/12
U/S on 6/8/12 - H/B at 128 BPM; U/S on 6/14/12 @ 9wks-No H/B-D&C on 6/17/12
IVF 2.0- ER 10/17; ET 10/20-One 12 cell, one 10 cell and one 8 cell embryo transfered
BFP! 11/16/12 U/S- Two nuggets with perfect heartbeats! EDD 7/10/13
5/31/2013- My miracles arrived at 34w2d! Welcome to the world Harper and Nolan!
My Blog- http://waitingonaangel.wordpress.com/
Thank you all and big hugs to you too!!!
I'm think I'm going to hang around this board today. I signed into my FB and a friend of mine tagged me in photos TODAY from her wedding... from the summer... when I was pg...
HIGH FIVE TO THE FACE!!! Thanks pal.
I keep telling myself she didn't know any better over the screaming in my head that she should have known better.
October 2011 - DS (7)
July 2014 - Stillborn DD (24 weeks)
August 2015 - DD (3)
April 2018 - 5 week loss
BFP#2 3/16/11, beta 138; 4/12 Baby/HB DS born 9/10/11 at 29w4d due to partial abruption and PTL
BFP#3 8/19/13 Another boy! 17P, modified bedrest and Nifedipine helped us have a termie! DS2 born 4/19/14 at 38w5d.
ITS A BOY!!!! Born 11/13/11 BFP #4: 10/29/12 edd 7/11/12
BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11
BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) DD born 4.23.14
My Recipe Blog
~All AL'ers welcome~
BFP#1 - 9/2/10, EDD 5/14/11, Twins Hannah and Liam lost 11/7/10 @ 13w1d.
BFP #2 - 2/9/11, EDD 10/13/11, LO lost 2/13/11 @ 5w4d
BFP #3 - 5/9/11, DS born 1/13/12
~*~My BFP Chart~*~Our Story~*~
~*~Labor Buddies with Sweet Turnip - Welcome Baby Girl 2/23/12 & Aluenna - Welcome Ivy 1/6/12~*~
I'm so sorry.... I know I'm dreading my day and it's getting here faster than I'd like.
It's hard not to think 'what if...' A friend of mine wrote me after my m/c. She said that she had 2 m/c before having her daughter. She made a really good point: if it weren't for her m/c's she would have never had her daughter and she is the perfect child for her. I guess you have to believe that today is just one day closer to your perfect child.
(((Hugs)))
BFP#1: 7/23/10, EDD 4/1/11, MC/DNC 9/29/10(14wks)
BFP#2: 1/12/11 CP (6 Weeks)
BFP#3: 6/26/11, EDD 3/4/12, Natural MC 8/5/11 (10wks)
TTC#1 since 2004
LGBT
4 cycles @ home with known donor - BFN
RE un-medicated IUI cycles # 1-7= BFN
NEW RE Clomid 50mg/ Ovidrel/ IUI #8 BFN
Took long break
Nov 2009 - Clomid 50mg/ Ovidrel/IUI #9 = BFP
Beta 12/4 - 10...Beta #2 12/7- 28 Beta #3 12/9 - 80!
1st sonogram 12/28 - slow hb and growth
m/c 1/1/2010 Courtland 8w0d
Nov 2010 cycle cancelled - polyp removal/hysteroscopy
April 4 2011 - IUI #10 BFFN
July 5, 2011 - #11 BFFN AMH .62 Boo
BFP 12/05/10 (EDD 8/8/11), empty gestational sac 12/31/10, natural miscarriage 01/05/11
BFP 03/03/11, EDD 11/09/11, We love you so much already, our sweet little munchkin!!!
*Congrats to buddies MrsAtch, cflocco, MommyandKate, luckylady55, opallover, trishiepoo, stephsteph77, and Pachita! Praying for healthy babies for all of you!*
*Congrats to my buddy, Izabella22 (BFP 5/11/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
*Congrats to my buddy, myaddiwaddi06(BFP 10/31/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
Because of the great "Snow"vember of 2015, my medicated cycle was cancelled. However, we were blessed with our little rainbow baby due on 8/14/15! Baby J had other plans and decided to make his grand ole entrance on 7/4/2015!
Surprise! Our little girl entered this world on 12/8/2016 after her eviction notice was long past due. Our little turkey baby turned into a snow baby!
M/C 10wk 3d EDD: 2011 march 4 C/P EDD: 2011 september 11
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~Siggy Warning~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
DS Otis Jack 11-17-10- 11-17-10 born at 37 weeks @ 7lbs 14oz, 20in
due to Potter's Sequence, our baby boy lived only 64 min.
mc 1/17/12