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vera1127
member
Still close to your ILs?
vera1127
member
So my MIL and SIL wanted to come visit on Saturday. I have a wonderful relationship with both so of course I said yes. We had an AWESOME time. I got to spend time with my nephew, and N loved seeing his aunt and grandmother. When they left I got a little upset and they gave me a huge hug and told me they weren't going anywhere, and that just because H and I weren't together anymore doesn't mean that I have to stop seeing them. I am so hopeful that this is true. Have any of you had good experiences staying close with your ILs after your marriage ended?
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Re: Still close to your ILs?
Yes, with some XILs... I was close with XMIL & XFIL while married to XH. After I left him, I never contacted them, aside from one time when I tried to explain to XMIL why I wanted to divorce her son. And they never contacted me. After I discovered I was pregnant by XH, I contacted them, and we have become close again. I told them if they didn't want to be in LO's life, I would understand and not contact them again, but that didn't turn out to be the case. They are nice people and I am glad to be close with them again.
As for XBIL, he was very nice, but we were never really close. His wife never liked me so honestly, I am perfectly fine if I don't ever have a relationship with them.
Hopefully your LO is able to have a relationship with your ILs, if you are comfortable with it
Yep, my xBIL, his GF, and my niece came over the other day to bring Christmas presents to my girls from XMIL (with whom I don't care to have a relationship) and we had some pizza and beer and hung out and let the kids play.
xBIL actually lived with XH for the first several years we were dating, so he's been like a little brother to me for the past ten years. We talk more than he and XH do.
No. We were very tight during my marriage, we had dinner at least once a week, talked all the time, went on vacations together. I was closer to my MIL than my own mother. She was the first person I told that I was pregnant. Things went down hill after I told my now XH that I was pregnant and he wanted me to abort. I did tell his family that he wanted me to abort and they thought I was lying, because DB told them so. My XSIL and I got into an argument one time and she said, "My family doesn't believe in abortions. You are a liar!" After that, I thought they can believe whatever the hell they want, and I had nothing more to do with them until the baby was born.
I did talk to my MIL when I invited her over to see her grandkids the day after Christmas 2009, and she accused me of stalking XH, calling his work, harrassing the Homewrecker and her family, she told me that XH had told her all about it. I told her that I had NEVER done any of that, that it was all lies. I told her that I realize she will believe what her son tells her, but it just wasn't true. I haven't spoken to her since, and I don't intend to.
Damn, typing all of that out makes me wonder why I am even civil to that DirtBag!
I have an "OK" relationship with XSIL. We are cordial and she has three kids and another on the way so we know it's the best thing to get along for their sake.
I had a falling out with SD's grandmother but now we've recently gotten back onto better terms. I took P to see them last weekend and it went well.
XMIL is another story. She's been truly horrible to me and I will never forgive her. I almost have more resentment towards her than I do towards SD because she KNEW everything that was going on with us. I confided in her about how horribly he was treating me and she didn't care. When I filed for divorce she washed her hands of me.