Happy news turned sad :(

huffinlove · January 2011

Hello girls,

I am so sad to have to post that our miracle (surprise) BFP ended in a miscarriage last Friday. Went for my 12 week appt and saw that the baby must have stopped growing around 10 weeks. I had NO symptoms that anything was going wrong..so I was in complete shock. Anyway.. I had the D and E last Sunday and am still experiencing bleeding/cramping and most recently a terrible headache Any of you that had this procedure also experience the headache part? I felt pretty good the first few days and now am going down hill Is this normal?

Also- we are now torn as to what to do next. We have morphology issues and had our first son through IVF. We have 3 frozen embies. After this surprise BFP and then surprise miscarriage...we are more confused than ever. Any thoughts??

TIA girls....:)

smilee · January 2011

I don't really have any advice, but I am just so very sorry for your loss. Big hugs to you.

huffinlove · January 2011

Thanks so much smilee!! Your little boy is ADORABLE

schmoodle · January 2011

I'm so sorry about your loss. Unfortunately, I don't have any helpful experience. Best of luck.

PhillySue · January 2011

((hugs)) I am so sorry : ( I had a m/c at 7 weeks. I also had terrible headaches for a week or 2 post D&C. I think it is from the hormone crash. I was in a similar situation with a surprise bfp and m/c. We needed an ivf for dd. We have since done 3 IUIs and are moving on to ivf if this IUI is a bust. I agree it is hard mentally moving on to IVF after knowing I can get pregnant but I am ready to move on. My "rogue" pregnancy really threw me for a loop. I hope you start feeling better and are able to decide what to do next.

huffinlove · January 2011

Thanks girls. PhillySue...do you mind me asking what your "problem" was/is? How long did you wait to try after your MC? Best of luck with your upcoming IVF.

PhillySue · January 2011

huffinlove:
Thanks girls. PhillySue...do you mind me asking what your "problem" was/is? How long did you wait to try after your MC? Best of luck with your upcoming IVF.

Don't mind at all. Our original diagnosis was MFI ( low count under 5 million). RE suggested we go right to ivf after DH's count did not improve post varicocele surgery. Well now 3 years after his surgery his count is normal. But we suspect I also have some underlying issues we did not realize. I always have a very short LP and Now doing these IUIs my e2 never gets high and I am probably not making mature eggs. But obviously I did get pregnant so we are so confused. We only had to wait till I got my 1st AF post D& C (5 weeks) and RE gave us the ok to move forward. Maybe you can try for a few months on your own then I would do an FET.

oct92004bride · January 2011

Don't have any advice just wanted to say sorry for your loss.

Christakim · January 2011

I don't have any good advice for you, but I'm so sorry for your loss:(

laura&dan05 · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss! ((hugs)) We lost our surprise BFP baby a year ago. After my D&E I had a hard time with hot flashes, my milk supply (I was still bfing dd), and headaches. I took awhile before I felt back to normal. We had 4 frozen embryos and decided to move forward with a FET once I was physically and emotionally ready. We lost the baby at the end of Jan and I had the FET transfer in May which was successful and we are expecting a baby boy in a few weeks. Take time to heal and weigh your options. I hope you are surrounded by lots of love and support during this difficult time!

tina623 · January 2011

No advice but I'm so sorry about your loss. So heartbreaking. Big hugs to you.

macschic · January 2011

So sorry for your loss. Our surprise BFP also ended in a m/c about 2 weeks ago. I was only 6 weeks and I m/c'd naturally.

DD was conceived through IVF almost 3 years ago. I have an appointment with my RE this week to sort things out and to talk about where to go from here. Hopefully we can come up with a plan at that appointment.

Can you make an appointment with your RE and see what he/she recommends you do?

((Hugs))

Courted · January 2011

Oh, I am so sorry for your loss! I know how hard that it. I had a D&C in August and I bled and cramped for two weeks. It was so terrible on top of the emotional pain you have to go through.

If you guys have 3 frosty embies then can't you go forward with that before doing another fresh IVF cycle? I guess it also depends on your insurance. Again, I am so sorry! ((((HUGS)))))

DavezWife · January 2011

I am so terribly sorry, my heart hurts for you both. (and your whole family)

The headache part is one of the worst physical parts, and for me, lasts about 3 weeks, boo. (right between the eyes??? like a bullet to the forehead?? I take topomax for it, a rx for migraines, but round the clock ibuprofen does seem to help. lots of water, limit light.... keep a steady stream of caffeine in your system...

I'm so sorry. the headaches are due to the flux in hormones. and the worst seems to be about 2-3 weeks from D&C/loss.

Again, so sorry.

dana316 · January 2011

I'm so, so sorry.

(((Hugs)))

Kim777 · January 2011

I don't have any advice. I just wanted to say that I am so sorry for your loss.

qtpa2t · January 2011

I'm so sorry.

dundasgirl · January 2011

I am so sorry for your loss. I have not had a D&C but would imagine the headache would be from the hormone crash.

Good luck moving forward!

desabean · January 2011

I'm so sorry. I don't have experience with a D&E but headache's would not surprise me (I think I had them too with my "natural" m/c)-- that change in hormones can do a number on you in so many ways, much less the stress you are going through.

A surprise bfp must be so inspiring-- that is a really good sign! I guess my thoughts on your situation are that if you feel like you have time (I'm going to be 39 and am paying for cobra for coverage and still have to pay about $4,000 oop per cycle, so I don't) I would try on my own a little more. It is so hard for us infertiles because while we know that m/c is a fairly common thing, it is so hard to know if yours is "just one of those things" or related somehow to your if issues....but, IVF sucks so if I could avoid it, I would.

Good luck!!

jenber77 · January 2011

I'm so very sorry for your loss. I hope you find a path you feel comfortable with moving forward.

njdcgirl · January 2011

I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Waiting4baby08 · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss.

gabbeyh · January 2011

I'm so sorry

jds0521 · January 2011

Sending big hugs your way - I am so sorry for your loss. Have you thought about doing a consult to discuss your options with your RE? GL to you & hope your headache subsides soon.

Carrie25 · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. =(

igh0318 · January 2011

I'm so very sorry for your loss. ((Hugs))

armywife76 · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. ((hugs))

mel72 · January 2011

I am so very sorry for your loss. I had a d&c and also really bad headaches for a few weeks as my hormones readjusted. Again, I am so sorry. I also had zero symptoms and it was the darkest day of my life.

June24Bride · January 2011

This sucks. I hate this for you. I too experienced horrid migraines after the D&E. After our d&e we had to wait 3 months to do treatments again.

I would really do further investigation on the morph issues and such. If that's the ONLY issue you guys deal with, I'd get a couple different opinions and see if you cant improve his morph then do a few natural cycles.

Again I'm so sorry.

cjsbdl · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Are the frozen embryos from the cycle tht gave you your son? If I were in your shoes I'd probably transfer those first before trying anything else.

SeaSoul · January 2011

Oh, no! I'm so very sorry this happened to you.

Cajun_gal · January 2011

I am so, so sorry.

I would probably go ahead and use the frozen embies when you're ready to start trying again just because I'd have a really hard time knowing they're there and not using them (just my own personal feelings). If it wasn't for the frozen embies, I'd probably try on our own for a while again before jumping back into treatment. ((hugs)) You're in my thoughts.

Mouseygail · January 2011

I'm so sorry

cowgirltn · January 2011

I am sorry for your loss.

itsmevkb · January 2011

I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a similar experience. My husband has 0% morph. We did IVF for our second and were told that we had a less than 4% chance of conceiving on our own. Six months after I had my daughter I was pregnant. Surprise! Unfortunately, I lost that pregnancy at 14 weeks.

After the miscarriage we looked into fertility treatments again because although I had gotten pregnant, I was 38 and didn't know how long, if ever, it would take for me to get pregnant again. Right when we made the decision to try IUI I got pregnant again. And again, I miscarried. We tried on our own then for two cycles and then moved onto IUI. The second IUI worked and I am once again pregnant and hoping against hope that this is a live baby for us.

We have one frozen embryo and will do a FET after the resolution of this pregnancy. I feel strongly that we should use our frozen embryo. I've always wanted a lot of children so I'd be overjoyed if it worked out.

Did you have any testing done on the embryo?

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