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School-Aged Children
StephNJer
member
September birthday entering Kindergarten
StephNJer
member
In my state, the age cutoff is 5 by December 1st. They are in the process of moving the date up to September 1st, but this is not happening for another two-three years or so. DD will be 5 on September 10th, and because we are still on the current cutoff of Dec., she could start Kinder this coming fall. Here school starts around the last week of August, so she'd actually be 4 for a few weeks of Kinder.
She is currently not in preschool and I'm a SAHM. We are agonizing over whether to send her this year or wait another year to send her. Academically, I think she would do fine. She knows how to cut with scissors, knows her shapes, colors, letters, numbers, etc., the sounds each letter makes, can write her name, etc. Socially, though, i worry. Everyone I talk to seems to have an opinion either way, but most parents/teachers I talk to tell me about the disadvantage of kids being the youngest in their class.I honestly don't know what the right answer is. I know each kid and each situation is different, and only we can make the decision because we know our DD best. But seriously, I am so torn. If we did decide to not send her this year, we would at least do a year of Preschool or Pre-K for her this fall.
Does anyone have any experiences with being either the youngest or the oldest in their class? DH fears that if we wait to send her until she's 5 turning 6 that she will be bored, which can cause it's own problems. I fear that if we send her this fall when she's 4 turning 5 she may have trouble keeping up with her peers maturity wise. Does anyone know if there is anywhere we can have her evaluated for Kindergarten readiness?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: September birthday entering Kindergarten
DS was in daycare at 4 and 5 years old, they evaluated the kids for kinder. Have you asked the schools, they might do it too.
I think your DD would be fine to start. She won't even be the youngest in her class since there will probably be kids with Oct and Nov birthdays.
My DD's birthday is Oct 2nd, and the cutoff in our state is Sept 1st. She had to wait an extra year to start kinder, and at the time I was upset by that because I knew that she was intellectually ready. However, now that she is in 2nd grade, I will say that the extra year definitely helped her. She is the oldest child in her class, yes, but she is also the most mature because of those extra 6 to 11 months between her and her friends, and it has been very beneficial in social situations. She assumes a leadership role in a lot of situations and is very confident in her abilities, which I don't think would have been the case if she had been the baby of the class. In a lot of ways, being older than her immediate peers helped shape her personality in a very short time!
Also - and I'm not an expert by any means - but I feel that there is a HUGE maturity difference between age 4 and 5, not just in childrens' personalities, but in their cognitive thinking as well. I noticed that with both of my DD's, and my DS (who is about to turn 4) appears to be following suit.
I'm Sept 1st with a Dec 1st cutoff. I was far from the youngest in my class and I did fine. I could read going into Kindergarten. I don't think I noticed my age very much, except when I was towards the end of getting a drivers license or drinking legally or whatever.
My brother, on the other hand, is a November bday with the same cutoff. He SO could have used another year. Mostly socially.
I have kids on both ends of a Sept 1 cutoff. My son was 5 in August and started K as one of the youngest, but the tallest, in his class. He was ready, socially and academically. Now, when he's 13 and everyone else 14 and the difference is more noticable, we'll deal with it then. We did think about it, but he's fine now.
DD is a December bday, so she'll be almost 6 by the time she gets into K. She's going to go nuts. She's "advanced", mostly thanks to big brother. I honestly feel like December is too young to try to get her to skip a year, but on the other hand, it's going to be a long couple of years until she can start Kindergarten...
All kids are different. It's hard to know what the right choice to make is...
I am in the same situation. Our cut-off is Sept. 30th. DS will be 5 on Sept. 23rd and school starts mid-August. So he will be 4 for about a month or so. This has casued me some anxiety. I do think he will do very well academically, but socially is another story. I have decided to start him this year and give it a shot. If things do not go well I will simply hold him back another year. On one hand I think he will be fine. After all, I myself started K at 4 (and was very shy, had never been to pre-k or daycare), and did very well academically and socially. But I have heard that boys mature much slower than girls.
Also, he is a totally different boy when he is at daycare vs. when he is at home. Example ... at daycare (they have a pre-k program that he is in), he can add small numbers, write letters and numbers, knows shapes, colors, even read some words, etc. He gets along great w/ the kids in his class (some older than him). But once he is home and me or my DH ask him to read/write, etc., he plays dumb ... KWIM?
Wow, I've rambled quite a bit sorry. Good luck! Hope this helps
As a late September birthday (started school at 4) and a primary teacher I'd say if you can, keep her home another year. It's not just how ready she is for kindergarten and the cutting, letters etc, it's how ready she'll be for 1st grade, for 9th grade for college. She'll always be young and less mature than her counterparts. It would have been better had my mom kept me home another year - maturity wise. I started college at 17 - believe me, I wasn't ready - sure I ended up ok, but don't we want to give our kids the best advantages.
I have also been seeing a trend for parents to keep their kids home that extra year, so she very well may be one of the very youngest children. In my experience (16 years of teaching k-2) the older children tend to be at the top of the class with the younger children in the middle to bottom. It's not strictly the case, but what I often observe.
I also have only see one older child "bored" and I believe that was due to how her parents were raising her so adult-like rather than really being bored at school. Her particular class was full of 6 year olds - only 1 fall birthday in the whole class and no one else was bored.
Talk to any primary teacher and they will tell you the difference between a class of older children rather than fall birthdays. Even my friend who taught 3rd grade several years back had my former 2nd graders who were almost all fall birthdays - the class had at least one child each day who cried - all the way to February. And that was 3rd grade, so they don't necessarily catch up on the maturity thing.
My youngest DD has an Aug 30 birthday, and even with the Dec 1 cut off here in Michigan, she'll be waiting until she's 6 to start kindergarten.
hope this helps.
I think this really depends on the child. I am also a Sept bday in MI and was fine going to college at 17. By the time I started college, if not earlier, there was no advantage to being older. In fact, I think it sometimes hurt the kids who had it easy all the way through school b/c they thought they didn't have to work hard in college.
Unfortunately, I don't think this is something anyone else can answer for you. But, whatever you decide, things are easy enough to change early on. If you try KG and it doesn't work out, you can always switch back to preschool and try again the next year. Just remember that KG is a big transition year, so it's not always easy to see how they're doing until after the first couple months.
Our cut-off is now turning 5 before the school year starts (usually around Aug. 25). I was always one of the youngest in my class (born in Sept.) and I never had any problems with it. It did suck when everyone was driving and I couldnt until later.
I think that if she is academically ready, I would allow her to start. I actually enjoyed it - like I was "looked after" or something!
My son started kindergarten this year. His birthday is July 27th with an Aug. 31 cut off. He is the youngest in his class by at least a few months. It is obvious. He is doing spectacular academically, but he does often get corrected for talking when he's not supposed to, not sitting still, etc. However, he is in a very structured private kindergarten with very high expectations for the kids. The next youngest kid in the class is also a girl which I think can make a big difference.
I had considered having him do pre-k again this year instead, but his teacher encouraged me that by the end of the year, he'd be close to where the other kids are, and with how well he's doing academically, it would be difficult to justify.
Like I said, though, his birthday is the end of July, so although he's the youngest in his class, he was 5 by the time school started. If he would have been 4, I think the decision to send him would have come with much more consideration.
Now, I started Kindergarten at 4 with a mid-November birthday. I didn't notice the difference in age until I went to college. I graduated after three years of high school, so I went to college at 16. I thought I was ready, but no. I didn't realize how not ready I was until much later. If I would have gone to high school for four years and gone to college at 17, I think I would have been fine.
TTC #2 for a million years: SA normal, CD 23 bloodwork shows nothing amiss, ovulation detected. Next step: ? maybe CD3 bloodwork to check eggs? All out of pocket, so limited IF tests/treatments.
I just randomly came to this board today and happened to see this question...
I am a kindergarten teacher in California and it is definitely better to wait a year. There are a handful of kids who start when they are 4 who do fine, but 90% of them would have done much better if they had waited another year. Starting kindergarten has absolutely nothing to do with academics. It is only the social and emotional aspects that matter. If your child hasn't been to preschool and she is young to begin with, she will most likely have a difficult time adjusting and succeeding in school not just in kindergarten, but throughout her education.
Many of our parents end up sending their kids early because they don't want to pay for another year of preschool. Also, preschool teachers usually tell them that their kids are ready because they base it on academics. I have had plenty of kids in my class who are reading at a 2nd grade level, but who need to be in kindergarten because they can't function socially.
There is a very good reason why California is pushing the entry date cutoff to September. I believe that all kindergartners need to be 5 by the time they begin.
She's Forever Ours! Finaliaztion-12.26.12
I can give a few examples - I grew up in MI with a Dec 1 cutoff and my birthday is Dec 21st. I was the 3rd oldest in my class. For me, being the youngest of 4, I was so ready to go to school and had the social skills - I am very outgoing, had been going to preschool for 2 years for 2 years already, I was ready and did pretty well in school.
My older DD will be 5 in June. Our cut-off is Sept 1 so she will be 5 and a few months this fall when she could start kindergarten. We have made the decision to hold her back a year and she will be 6 and a few months when she starts. While my DD is very social, she has a speech delay (in speech preschool 2x a week for 90 mins each) plus in a full time Pre-K program through the school that she will be repeating. Due to the speech delay, she has a very hard time socially as the kids don't always understand her. She is not as mature as the other kids in her class - again, a lot of this has to do with the speech stuff and is getting better as her speech gets better. She has a learned and grown so much this year that I am 200% sure that another year in her current programs will make the world of difference for her. My DD has been in daycare/preschool since she was an infant.
There is a boy in my DD's class that has a Jan birthday and his parents held him back a year as he was not socially ready. He is a very bright kid and an overall amazing kid and has taken to my DD like crazy - he has helped her so much and is so amazing with her. This little guy just turned 6 and will start kindergarten at 6 1/2. His parents feel that even though he will be older than his classmates, it was the right decision for him.
I have a friend in CA whose son turns 5 this fall and like yours, could start Kindergarten this fall. She is holding him back again as he is not ready socially - very bright child.
My cousin, whose DD was born premature at 32 weeks did not hold her DD back (in Kindergarten this year) as she has a Feb birthday with a Dec 1 cut-off. She just told me recently that she regrets not holding her DD back this year. She is doing OK but struggles in some areas. She just didn't want her DD to be the oldest kid in her class so she based her decision only on the cut-off and her DD ages and not on how her DD would do.
Bottom line as you said is only you and your DH can make the decision but you need to look at the whole picture - social skills are so important for kids and just because your child might academically be ready, socially they may not be and that will make it hard for them. It is easy to hold a child back before they start Kindergarten but to hold them back after that gets a lot harder in so many ways.
If you are questioning your DD's social behaviors, I'd wait a year and send her to preschool. Kids who go into formal school with some school experience and who are more mature do much better.
In my state (MN) the cut off is the end of August. Kids must be 5 by the time school starts in September, some parents whose kids have summer birthdays choose to wait. Just think, those kids starting K the following year would be 6 or so months older than your daughter which is significant for a 4-5 year old.
Like another poster said-being the youngest and/or less mature student will affect her beyond kindergarten. I teach first grade, and I can usually tell the difference between the students who are younger. Last year I had a little boy who turned 6 in December (this would be like your son when he's in first grade), and he was very immature compared to the rest of the class. It was really unfortunate that his parents didn't have him repeat K. Academically he did better than his same age peers, but in the classroom his immaturity affected his academic performance as well. It never hurts to give kids another year.
On the other hand, I've had some very mature younger students. I think it boils down the the child, and you know your child best. But if you have any reservations, I'd wait a year.
My birthday is September 10th too so I was always the youngest of my grade/class. Based on my experience, I would definitely send her to kindergarten. She will adjust to the kids around her. I know, for sure, I was more mature than most my classmates growing up. Age does not determine maturity. I always received good grades & did very well socially. Give her a chance!!
eta: I also did not attend preschool.
I totally agree with the poster who said don't just think of her as a young kindergartener, but a young 3rd grader, 7th grader etc. I teach 3rd grade and 95% of the time, the young ones would be SO much better off if they had waited a year. I actually can only really think of one boy with a July or later birthday who was in the "right" grade. (we cut off Sept 1, but the kids can test in through Dec 31) Girls seems to struggle with anything after Sept 1. Many times it is not the academics but the social issues. 3rd grade girls are starting to get mean and they really notice that the younger ones are into Barbies while they are into Bieber. The oldest kids are usually the leaders academically and socially. My son's birthday is Sept 6 and there is NO way I would ever send him early.
School today is really a lot different than when we were kids. It is tougher from the start. Kinder is really more like 1st grade was. By the end of K, our students should be ready for early chapter books (think Bargain for Francis type books) and 2 digit (without borrowing) addition and subtraction. Socially, the kids are a lot more saavy- which is not always good, but it is true. My birthday is June 29 and I never had an issue being young, but I see it over and over again with my students. And with the trend to hold, she will potentially have classmates a full year older than her. I have had many many parents tell me that they wish they wouldn't have started their child early, but I have never had one tell me they wish they would have put them in sooner.
It is a hard issue. I really wish there was a national cut off date- no exceptions either way (early or late). But, that is unlikely to happen, so I would recommend waiting.
My birthday is Sept. 12th and I started Kindergarten when I was 4 (about to turn 5). I was always the youngest in my class, but it never seemed to matter. in fact, I think it HELPED me socially. Growing up I was able to learn and model behaviors from kids who were slightly older than me. I never felt like it was a problem for me.
In fact, it's helped me feel really good about myself because when I graduated high school I was only 17, and I had my Master's Degree 6 months after I turned 22. I'm very proud of those accomplishments and I sort of pat myself on the back FOR being young and having achieved those things.
I say go for it!
DD was one of the youngest in her class (born 2 mos. before the cutoff date). Academically, she has struggled. She is just not old enough for some concepts to "click" with her. Many other students in the "extra help resources" classes are kids born at the end of the cutoff.
It was really hard on her when the other kids were reading. The kids were on books labeled by their degree of difficulty (A = easy, M= hard). She would come to me and say "I moved up to H!" and the other kids in our car pool would say "I"m on *M* already!" "I'm on L!" (not saying the kids were being mean, just kids doing their own AWing). So DD would feel bad - meanwhile the kids were 8 months older than she was and only 3-4 levels behind.
Trust me, almost all of the boys will be back one year, especially the ones her age. I would not be concerned with boredom. If I could do it again, I would hold my DD back. She is "catching up," by now, but I would still do it.