Naming babe - did you just FEEL it was your baby's name or....Not until later?

sommerrayne · January 2011

So a million years ago, I decided that my daughter's name would be Rhayna - on my second date with the man who would end up being my DH I told him: "If this works out, and if we so elect to have kids and if that kid is a girl, her name will be Rhayna, ok? If you're not cool with that, this won't work"

Well, he agreed.

I never, in a million years thought we'd end up with TWO girls! Silly, sure, but I just didn't think it was in the cards for us. I never thought of a name to go with Rhayna.

Well, we've come up with one that we both like. It was on my list before DH "came up with it" (he thinks it was his idea which works for me! HA!).

The gig is, I really like the name (its not my top choice but I like it about 10% less than my top top choice) but I don't SEE it as my kid's name the way I did with Rhayna. I mean I had envisioned Rhayna's name for over a decade. I worked it into my lexicon of imagined dialogue. It wasn't just a name - it was MY CHILD'S name.

I've not had but a few months to think about this name. I like it a lot! I love the nick name for it. I'm just having a hard time "connecting" it to this baby....but when I try to come up with something more "connect-y" - there's nothing. Absolutley nothing strikes me.

Thoughts? Input?

firsttogo · January 2011

We did not go in to the delivery room with ONE name for any of our babies. We "met" them first, and honestly, Lincoln and Gwen had to grow on me. I do not know what else we would have called Linc, and he is a Lincoln, but Gwen was a Gweneviere, Gwendolyn, or Nora....

I think that there is nothing wrong with the name working it's way into your life a bit!

Waiting4baby08 · January 2011

When I was pregnant the first time, we had Gwen's name picked out. It felt right but there was another pretty name we also liked. We always liked this one better, but were wondering how to decide if the name belonged to her. We ended up choosing it because we loved it, but as soon as I heard her NICU nurses calling her by her name, I just knew it was perfect for her.

So I guess we didn't "see" our child with the name until after she was born. We chose it long before birth, though, just because we liked it.

mmcarlson1 · January 2011

When we first added Eli Samuel to our list of names we went to church that night and the sermon was the story of Eli and Samuel. I was intrigued, but didn't think too much of it. We went into delivery with our list an waited to meet our little man. He was born at 12:11am am we didn't name him until that night. During that day, we had a nurse come in our room with a 10 year old boy who had spent some time in the NICU when hw was born. Every now and then former NICU babies come in an give stuffed animals to current NICU babies. The nurse came into the room and introduced the boy to us. His name was Eli. We knew then that that was the name for our little boy.

mel72 · January 2011

DH's family is ALL boys so all the ones I liked were taken. Jacob wasn't my fave at the time but I really love it now. I think you feel the connection more when they are here - just my opinion.

Cassian · January 2011

Before I got pregnant, I was IN LOVE with the names Rhiannon and Genevieve. I called on of our twins we lost Rhiannon in my mind, just to give her a name, so that was out. When I was pg with Maya, I was obsessed with Genevieve. I would call her Ginny for short, and I had dreams about a little redheaded girl named Genevieve. I still love them name, but I also loved Maya as a second choice. I secretly thought Maya Renee was beautiful. Then DH and I started discussing names and he brought up Maya and he was in love with it. Then one of our friends asked us and we told her we like Maya, and she said we should call her Maya Renee. That was it. I wanted DH to feel like he had a part in this pg too so I compromised my first choice for his, and that was it. I can't imagine my DD being anything BUT Maya now.

Now if we have another girl, I will push for Genevieve again

Christakim · January 2011

We decided on Juliette on the OR table because we just couldn't agree. I like that more than I like the name Tucker now, it's weird. And now that I see Tuck, he doesn't look like one and I'm a little disappointed. Names are so hard!

sasa625 · January 2011

I had a name picked out for my (future) little girl for forever... no one (including DH) liked it, but he agreed because he came up with a nickname for it that he really liked. I could even picture what my little girl with this name would look like.

However, when my mom passed away it changed everything. She had loved a certain name and jokingly said that she was naming my first daughter (I didn't care for the name at all) It was her dream to have a little girl with this name. She had to have emergency surgery and (although she was in a coma) I told her if she pulled through, I would give my first daughter this name. She made it through but passed away a few hours later. From that moment on, DH and I had our daughter's name picked out. I still didn't love the name, but once we found out we were having a girl, I started referring to her by name right away. Now I can't imagine her being named anything else. It definitely fits her (and it has since the second we saw her!)

If we have another little girl, I don't know that we'll use my original name choice. It really doesn't go with DD's (very traditional) name, and I'm honestly not sure I even like it anymore.

LIAngel · January 2011

With Nicholas, I always knew since I was a little girl if I had a son, his name would be Nicholas (thanks to watching Eight is ENough as a child-loved Adam Rich- who played Nicholas). Thankfully DH agreed.

With Ava, I just love the name. And again thankfully DH agrees. Not sure if she'll look like an Ava when she's born, but that's her name and we're sticking to it.

skoorbnibor · January 2011

since I knew I would have an Ethan in 1987, I am no help to you!

browneyedgrl4282 · January 2011

We fought a lot about names in the begining. I did not want anything too popular since our last name is so freaking common. I said from day one that no matter what if we had boy his middle name had to be Perry, my brother who died in 2001. So I kept saying Preston Perry and dh wasn't having it. He wanted VETTE, yes like CORVETTE! Yeah right that wasn't happening. So we went back and forth on boys name until dh said fine name him what you want. I just loved the flow of his entire name.

Now with girls, I always wanted Ava but because it was so popular i didn't use it. DH wanted Jordan really bad but i thought it was too masculine and i wanted a girly name. My mom and sister were coming with me for my 20 week u/s, mind you i just told them 2 weeks before i was pregnant let alone having twins, and they were listing a ton of names. My mom than started talking about an actress, Jordana Brewster, and said how she loved this movie and thought that was a cute name. I said that is it, I want that. DH was happy with that since it was close to what he wanted. The other names we were throwing around for her though were, Cecelia and Morgan. Her middle name was picked out already since it was my grandmothers name.

With Brady, we threw around Spencer, Parker, Julian, and Harrison for boys but i really wanted Brady. Girls it was either Juliana, Bailey, or Cecelia. We were at a craft show and i found this really cute xmas ornament i wanted with all our names, so i had to pick a name. I started saying all the kids names together with the boys name and Brady just sounded best.

LOL, my friends call my kids P,B&J sandwich

qtpa2t · January 2011

For me, yes and no. I knew and loved the name Gabrielle from the start. But DH was unsure about it so we went through several rounds of names. I resigned myself to the fact that he didn't like and tried to like other names. I was 100% convinced it was not her name, but he was very indecisive about other names so it was hard to get behind anything else either. I thought when I saw her, I would be able to insist on a name, but I didn't. To make matters worse, DH STILL couldn't decide on a name - or even have a strong opinion - until the forms person had come by a second time asking for the forms. With the pressure on, he let me have Gabrielle. I don't feel it any more. I'm not convinced he feels it or ever did. Yes, it's her name now, and it's fine, but I don't really feel it like I did originally. Probably why I call her 'baby' most of the time... I still love the name though and hopefully she will, too.

LisaMarisa · January 2011

It took me a long time to get used to DS's name (Hayden). I could only associate it with Hayden Fox on that show Coach. It was DH's favorite name and he really wanted to use it so I gave in. Once we started referring to him by that name it started growing on me and now that is just who he is - he couldnt be anything else.

I always wanted to name my daughter Amelia and like you, I'd used it in my mind millions of times. We decided to go with Delaney for this baby and it took me a little while to stop referring to her as Amelia (in my mind) but now that she is Delaney, it fits.

Just start referring to her by that name and give it some time. Before you know it, you wont be able to imagine her with another name.

JillRock96 · January 2011

I did, but only after letting it sit for a bit. We would decide on names when I was pregnant (once we knew the sexes), then keep them to ourselves for a few weeks or a month until we were sure. With all three girls, I really connected with the names and felt sure by the time they were born that they were the right names. But, I wouldn't say that I knew all along for years that Ava would be Ava or anything like that, KWIM? It's funny, though, even with the twins, I connected the names with the babies, knowing that Baby A was CeCe, regardless of whether she came out first or second, and Baby B was Charlie. They definitely had distinct personalities in there. Now that they are here, the names could not fit them any better. There's no way that CeCe could be Charlie or vice versa.

bmagsgirl · January 2011

As soon as we found out we were having a girl my husband had the name picked at the drs. office. Sophia Elizabeth was going to be her name. Neither of us cared how popular Sophia was. We both just liked the name and it fit perfectly.

howleyshell · January 2011

We didn't name either of them till after birth and even then it was a struggle so I can't relate at ALL to your experience naming your first.

I think it's totally normal to not connect a name to an unborn child.

I think you might be surprised after you lay eyes on her that she "feels" more like the name you've chosen - or not at ALL.

Jason came out looking like a Brian. It was HARD not to name him Brian (too much like our nephew Ryan so we'd never even considered it but as soon as we looked at him we BOTH said "wow... he looks like a Brian!"

We'd planned to name him Jackson but he really wasn't a Jackson.

Jason hadn't even been on the radar when I went into my section but that's how he came home.

Trust the process!

sommerrayne · January 2011

Thank you to everyone for being so candid, so honest, and so real with this post. I know it can be hard to open up and be really authentic when we're talking about something as sensitive as our kids.

Thanks for sharing your experiences! Even when they didn't "match" mine, they're great insight!

somethingchangd · January 2011

howleyshell:

We didn't name either of them till after birth and even then it was a struggle so I can't relate at ALL to your experience naming your first.

I think it's totally normal to not connect a name to an unborn child.

I think you might be surprised after you lay eyes on her that she "feels" more like the name you've chosen - or not at ALL.

Jason came out looking like a Brian. It was HARD not to name him Brian (too much like our nephew Ryan so we'd never even considered it but as soon as we looked at him we BOTH said "wow... he looks like a Brian!"

We'd planned to name him Jackson but he really wasn't a Jackson.

Jason hadn't even been on the radar when I went into my section but that's how he came home.

Trust the process!

Almost exactly this.

We didn't name Oliver until about 20 minutes before we left the hospital (and then only because I didn't want to have to figure out how to get him officially named later on). We'd tossed around Oliver but were a long way from sold. Oddly we both thought he really looked like a Ben, which had never even vaguely been discussed. We wondered for weeks if we should've named him Ben, even though neither of us particularly like it (and I have a cousin named Ben). Robin (his middle name) had never come up until after he was born. We basically wound up going with the name that we could both agree on, although it wasn't either of our first choices. (I will add, though, that both Oliver and Robin have special meaning to us. We didn't just pick them out of a book.)

For the first few months he didn't feel at all like an Ollie or Oliver to me. I would actually cringe when people used his name, because it didn't feel like him. (Robin, however, felt right from the moment we decided on it.) Now I can't see him as anything else. He is such an Ollie Robin - I love his name.

It'll come to you. And even if it isn't a striking moment of inspiration, it will grow on you.

I've had a girl's name forever (after my grandma), though. So if I ever wind up pregnant with a girl I'll get to experience your first experience. Fingers crossed!

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Naming babe - did you just FEEL it was your baby's name or....Not until later?

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