Non-clicky poll: When did/will you tell and why?

Ceridwen21 · January 2011

DH and I aren't seeing eye to eye on where to share our news with everyone. If it were up to him, we'd have already told our folks and siblings! I'm much more cautious and would rather wait until after our first appointment (8 weeks).

When did/will you tell your family and/or closest friends?

How did you come to that decision?

bmc62884 · January 2011

I wanted to wait until our first checkup but I just couldn't keep that kind of a secret with it being the first grandchild on both sides. We told my Mom and my siblings and when he gets back from his business trip we are going to go ahead and tell his Mom, Dad and sister.

Suesse2009 · January 2011

We told our families right away. They knew we were trying and I wasn't going to lie. My mom asked me the day I got a positive if I had tested. The same thing for my coworkers. They knew we were trying and when someone asked me I didn't want to lie. Everyone knew it was early so we all knew that anything could happen. We were all cautiously excited. I found out at just before 4 weeks and started getting really sick just a couple weeks later. I have hyperemesis and have been off work for a while. There is no way I could have hidden it for very long anyway.

Katie1081 · January 2011

I told my family right away. I was just 4 weeks. We told DH's parents when we were 7 weeks on Christmas. But we wanted to tell them in person and that was the first time we saw them. I figure that I'm really close to my family and if anything happened I would have a good support system. And, something could happen during anytime throughout pregnancy. I had coworker who miscarried at 20 weeks. So I don't think there is really a "safe" time. And for what it's worth, my first appt. all they did was go over history and take blood. They didn't do anything to confirm! They say if your not high risk, there is really no point.

But, this is just me. Everyone's situation is different. So, it's really just up to you and your husband. Whenever you feel comfortable.

tnleigh · January 2011

With my first BFP we told a couple of family members and friends right away. It ended in early loss and the un-telling was really hard. This time around we've told the bare minimum, my mom and both our bosses. We probably won't tell anyone else until after my first OB appt at 8 weeks.

teacherlindz · January 2011

We tried to wait for our first appt, which still isn't until Feb 2 and it totally didn't work! I have known for 3.5 weeks now and most our family and close friends know.

birdy09 · January 2011

With our 1st pregnancy we didn't tell anyone until after the 1st tri. DH had a loss with his 1st wife & found it really hard to break that news to everyone. I found it really hard to keep it a secret for that long, especially with my parents (whom I work with) and my best friends. It did seem to make the pregnancy short though!

With this pregnancy, DH accidently sent an email out to his immediate family (& it is a big family) at 6 weeks. So then we decided to tell my parents and our close friends. I kinda wish we had waited until the 2nd tri. It was neat having that little secret between just the 2 of us...

Jelliebean1982 · January 2011

We told after we saw the baby on u/s. We did tell our parents sooner, though. We had to tell everyone before the end of the 1st trimester because I'm obviously showing.

camdenfaithful · January 2011

When did/will you tell your family and/or closest friends? We haven't told anyone yet. We're telling family when I'm out of first tri (coincidentally it happens to be exactly 13w3d but that wasn't planned). We'll probably tell friends/extended family/work around 16ish weeks.

How did you come to that decision? We just kind of agreed on it together. I asked DH how long he wanted to wait and he said a looooong time and I was ok with it. Originally we weren't going to tell anyone until 16 weeks but decided to tell family a little sooner.

starskristen79 · January 2011

We told immediate family and friends right away, and made it public information after we heard the heartbeat at 9 weeks, 3 days.

Matt Dvorak · January 2011

I was maybe a little over 6 weeks when I told my immediate family - b/c it was Christmas and we wouldn't see them again for awhile. I am now trying to convince DH that we should tell his parents now before they hear it from someone else - b/c my coworkers know, and he let it slip to a friend. I hope we tell them tonight. I'll wait until after my next apt. (12 weeks or so) to really start spreading it.

islandgirl79 · January 2011

1st pregnancy I told parents and BFF around 8 weeks. Everyone else at 12 weeks.

I am 6 weeks now and have only told BFF. NOt sure when I will tell family and friends. I don't think I will be able to hide it for very long though.

alli&dan · January 2011

I agree. I'm so superstitious I feel like the minute we start telling people it won't be true. The only reason why we may tell earlier than I want to is because you usually have an appointment sometime early in your pregnancy (around 8 wks) where the nurse/ob will ask lots of family history questions. If you don't know much about your family history you would probably want to ask your parents, and of course you'd need a reason for asking...

ShandaLea · January 2011

With our 1st we told right away. We then had a loss and it was so hard since everyone knew I was pregnant. I am now 8w5d and we haven't told anyone. I am starting to show and am just avoiding everyone which is easy since I've been so sick. We leave on the 1st for 2 weeks and plan on telling when we get back since I'll be 12w unless our 5 yr old says something. She has already told me 'somethings wrong with you your boobies nad belly are getting fat' so hopefully she won't spill the beans even though we haven't told her

MrsMiller1002 · January 2011

starskristen79:
We told immediate family and friends right away, and made it public information after we heard the heartbeat at 9 weeks, 3 days.

I told family the day of bfp, we'll too make an announcement for the rest of friends after we hear the heartbeat.

JenniferAnnes · January 2011

When did/will you tell your family and/or closest friends? We are telling our parents at week 7. We won't tell extended family/friends til 12 weeks.

How did you come to that decision? DH's family lives out of town and we wanted to be able to tell them in person. The weekend we picked is the only weekend we can make it down there anytime soon, so that pretty much decided when we will tell. We'll tell my parents the Thursday before we leave to see DH's parents. I figure if something goes wrong, we'd tell them anyways for their support.

alubins · January 2011

It's really up to you & how comfortable you feel with telling people. When we first found out we were pregnant last Sept., we told our family right away (& with facebook & our siblings, word spread like fire). Unfortunately, I MC at 8wks, and telling everyone was really hard. This time around, we're waiting until after our 12wk check-up.

mrshaan · January 2011

We told our in-laws at 7 weeks. Close friends at 9 weeks. The close friends decided it would be ok to tell everyone the wanted...despite the fact that we told them we weren't telling for another month or so, but after we found out they were telling people, we started telling everyone. We figured some people would be hurt to hear it from someone else than us. Not the way I wanted it to happen, but what can you do?

fadushi · January 2011

With my first pregnancy we told people right away and it ended in a miscarriage around 6.5 weeks. It was hard but it was nice having a support system. With my son we told our close family right away and then everyone else at 10 weeks when we heard the heartbeat. With this pregnancy I didn't find out until about 6 weeks and I just felt like I did with my son so I felt comfortable telling everyone right away.

Ceridwen21 · January 2011

Thanks, everyone! You've given me lots to think about.

chanteltbarrett · January 2011

We told our parents and three friends when we first found out, but we're going to wait until I'm through my first tri before we tell anyone else.

I wanted to tell some people to share our excitement and also for support should something happen. I don't want to tell a bunch of people though and, God forbid, untell them, if something happens with the baby.

heylee · January 2011

My sister was the first to know, then at 8 weeks we told our moms and made them swear not to tell anyone! After our first ultrasound which was at 11w due to insurance we told everyone else. We wanted to be mostly out of the 1st trimester before telling everyone because it's the critical part of the pregnancy.

Augustmama1113 · January 2011

We told our immediate family at Christmas when I was 8w. We haven't told friends yet. We want to wait until after the first tri. I'm a bit more reserved about the news where DH wants to tell everyone. I did tell a few coworkers because I've felt so bad.

jgoetz:) · January 2011

We told DH's mom last night at 5w and will tell my mom this weekend too. For everyone else we're waiting until after we hear the heartbeat. I've had 2 losses so don't feel comfortable telling anyone else yet. I do want our moms to celebrate with us now though. They both know we've been trying again.

ally2011 · January 2011

We are very close to both of our families, but we are enjoying it just being our secret (and one set of married friends w/ kids) and are going to try to wait until at least first u/s appt (Feb 14) and possibly until mid-March and tell them at an anniversary dinner at our house (our anniversary is in March). I am worried about getting them all excited and then feeling like I let them down if something happens...I know that is silly, but it is how I feel. I am also enjoying not getting any unsolicited advice, helpful tips or expert opinions

If something were to happen, we would tell them as we would want the support, but just feel this is best for us for now. It was hard at first, but it is actually kind of fun now to think about how we will do it and enjoy it as a couple.

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