What helps you?

molRN · January 2011

Just kinda getting a feel for the different ways everyone is coping. Hopefully by sharing what works for you, we can maybe incorporate those that we think may be helpful for us. So what helps you? What are you intentionally doing that is for the purpose of healing? What have you discovered helps?

MegMeg0913 · January 2011

I think being able to get on here and talking with you all is a biggest part of healing for me. Since everyone is already here, I don't think that is what you were going for.

The DH and I are getting in better shape physically and financially, so when we finally get to expand our family we will be in a better place than we are now. This is making me feel like I still do have control of something, and it also is helps keeping me look towards the future and not being drowned by the past.

PiperS · January 2011

Coming here does really help me. It is comforting to know that I am not the only one this happened to. It feels that way sometimes because everyone in my life is pregnant and having perfectly healthy pregnancies!

Another thing that really helps me is staying busy. I have done a lot of retail therapy! I also made some changes for a fresh start. I rearranged furniture, did a little redecorating, bought new bedding, and cut 6 inches off my hair.

I know everyone is different and this might sound insensitive to some, but I put everything that reminded me of LO in a box in the basement (u/s pics, a little stuffed lamb, maternity clothes, baby clothes...) I did that as soon as I found out. I couldn't bear to look at them.

busterbeagle · January 2011

I decided to think long and hard about this so I can keep a little list for myself.

-Talking it out on here

-Talking it out with DH, my mom, my sister, my BFF

-Crying, staying in bed, wearing my most comfy sweats, and totally wallowing when I need to

-Keeping busy, working on projects around the house, thinking about my other goals besides motherhood and how I can work on them in the upcoming weeks and months when I feel up to it

-Cuddling, hugging, talking to, and playing with my dog

-Watching my favorite old TV shows and imagining I'm still 17

-Reminiscing with DH about our college days and the early phases of our relationship.

-Weirdly enough, getting into fights with DH and then working through things. I think our relationship is already stronger after just a week.

-Addressing my other issues. I think my miscarriage really opened up a lot of old wounds, and I'm realizing that there are some things I need to fix before I can be the best possible mommy.

-Writing. I haven't done much of it yet, but I have also found it very therapeutic in the past. I'm thinking of having a notebook devoted exclusively to this experience and what I'm feeling.

-Lurking on the TTCAL board and realizing I will be so ready to be there soon.

I think my list will keep growing after my D&C tomorrow and as my body heals. I want to start exercising again and get into my healthiest form for next time. I think winter is going to be very symbolic for most of us, and I really hope that spring brings us healing and hope.

MrsMitty08 · January 2011

These boards help me. It makes me realize I am not alone.

Getting back to my running routine has helped me. We found out we were pregnant the day before I ran a half marathon in November. I was symptom-free for about a week and then the nausea set in and knocked me off track. I had cut back on training and then we miscarried at the beginning of December. After the holidays, I re-joined my training group and ran a half marathon this past weekend. So, I guess, doing what I enjoy is what helps me.

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