Parenting after 35

NBR: Cat problem...WWYD?

I have 3 cats and one of them is a 5 year old female who I rescued 4 years ago as a feral and tamed her down somewhat.  She is the sweetest cat I've ever had!  Just loves to sit in our laps, has never done anything wrong in her life (never bit or scratched or hissed or went outside the litterbox).  The only problems are: a) she's terrified of the baby so she hides all day and b) our other 2 cats pick on her constantly and she won't fight back so she has scabs all over her neck from them biting her.  I feel horrible because I know she would be happier in a home with an old lady whose lap she could sit on all day, but rehoming her would be next to impossible given that our humane society is overfull with cats and she is black (unfortunately the least adoptable color for cats and dogs).  So do I try to rehome her, or keep her? I've never given up a cat before, I've spent most of my adult life rescuing and fostering feral, pregnant cats and neonatal kittens so the thought of giving away any pet makes me sick.  But is her quality of life bad enough for me to start looking? Right now she gets food, shelter and health care but not much attention.  If I found a stranger, single old lady or something, would Ebony be happier there than here?  Getting rid of my other 2 cats isn't an option.  I just feel guilty thinking about rehoming such a perfect, sweet kitty! 
Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

Re: NBR: Cat problem...WWYD?

  • Her fear of the baby will probably get better as he gets older.  Is there an area of the house that she spends most of her time in that could be her territory and the other cats shut out of for a while until she claims her space?  At one time we had 3 cats.  One cat's territory was the family room, another our bed room, and another roamed between the two and spent a great deal of time in the living room.  They did not hardly fight unless the roamer (who was the youngest and a neutered tom) decided he wanted to play with the other two who were both over 15 years old. 
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Loading the player...
  • imagevanverth:
    Her fear of the baby will probably get better as he gets older.  Is there an area of the house that she spends most of her time in that could be her territory and the other cats shut out of for a while until she claims her space?  At one time we had 3 cats.  One cat's territory was the family room, another our bed room, and another roamed between the two and spent a great deal of time in the living room.  They did not hardly fight unless the roamer (who was the youngest and a neutered tom) decided he wanted to play with the other two who were both over 15 years old. 

    Yeah that's a good point.  Her area is the bedroom closet but my other feral cat hides from the baby in there too and the other 2 cats don't mess with her during the day.  I'm just trying to do the analysis whether her quality of life would be better with me or someone else.  She does love our dogs and would miss them if I rehomed her.

    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I agree that it will get better as Simon gets older And as she gets older, she may start asserting herself. Esp. as she gets more confident. I always had cats growing up and most of my adult life and I think one day, she'll get tired of being the lowest monkey in the troup, or sense that the other cats are perhaps more vulnerable at a certain time, and seize the moment. Someone will undoubtably lose a few tufts of fur and the pecking order may change, but things would probably get better also. I would keep trying with her.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagemtnrider:

    imagevanverth:
    Her fear of the baby will probably get better as he gets older.  Is there an area of the house that she spends most of her time in that could be her territory and the other cats shut out of for a while until she claims her space?  At one time we had 3 cats.  One cat's territory was the family room, another our bed room, and another roamed between the two and spent a great deal of time in the living room.  They did not hardly fight unless the roamer (who was the youngest and a neutered tom) decided he wanted to play with the other two who were both over 15 years old. 

    Yeah that's a good point.  Her area is the bedroom closet but my other feral cat hides from the baby in there too and the other 2 cats don't mess with her during the day.  I'm just trying to do the analysis whether her quality of life would be better with me or someone else.  She does love our dogs and would miss them if I rehomed her.

    Then separate her from them during the night.  Perhaps shutting her in the bedroom with you (litter pan in the closet for her comfort) for a while.  Might make her very territorial of the bedroom and put a little kick in her ass.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • Yeah, I think she will do better in time as well.  Keep an eye out for senior's homes, though!  Sometimes they like having a sweet cat around for the residents.
    You are likely to be eaten by a grue. Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image
  • Definitely try to keep them separated all the time, not just during the day. 

    And if the opportunity arises to give her to a nice little old lady, I'd do it.   You can maybe post something at your church or the vet's office?  When someone's cat passes away, they might want a new one right away.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • We have 2 cats, both rescued. They don't get along, but we have a relatively big house so they stay separate. I agree with PP's that you should try to separate them and give her away only if there is no other choice and in good hands.
    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • I wouldn't worry about fear of the baby, which will likely lessen as he grows and is more predictable.  As for the others, well, you might as well keep an eye open.  FWIW, I made a heart-wrenching decision to rehome a cat I had helped tame after all other efforts to failed (meds, holistic stuff, animal trainer to the house, you name it).  He just wouldn't leave my other cat (who had been with me for 6 years) alone.  I tolerated it for almost 2 years before rehoming him and my other cat suddenly became so much happier that I wish I had done it sooner.


    image
    DD -- 5YO
    DS -- 3YO

  • I'd definitely keep her. She'll probably come around and, if nothing else, she at least has a good home.
  • I guess you guys are right, she doesn't seem unhappy so unless I can find some little old lady - which isn't likely in this area since there aren't many elderly who can deal with our winters and elevation  - I'll keep her and just keep spraying my other cats with water when they attack her. Devil
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"