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VBAC
My OB seems to be on board with a VBAC attemp and TOL. (vent..long)
I ended up cancelling my second OB appt today. After I met wit my OB, she must have read the notes from the previous appt and came in the room joking. I was not. She asked how I've been and I was very frank with her. "Given family drama and an ass load of stress heaped on me right now, I'm not in the mood to be playful and joke. I want a VBAC. I've done my homework and know there are other women who had been able to have a VBAC, provided favorable conditions were present, at 13.5 months pp. I know it's doable."
She quit joking and told me it possible and I was right. She doesn't think it's possible with 2 c-sections. That's when I told her I knew she screwed my chances for a VBAC at Emma's birth when they gave me the epidural I was allergic to and I had to be rushed to the OR for heart issues that weren't ever there before.
I told her I have not registered at the hospital yet and will not until I am in active labor. I told her I know she intends to push me for a c-section and I will refuse any forms pushed at me unless it becomes medically necessary. I reminded her that my weight wasn't an issue since I've been working hard to keep my weight down and my dietitian wasn't pleased when she weighed me and I've lost 3 lbs in 2 weeks.
I asked her what she would allow for a TOL before she slices me open again and that caught her off guard. She asked what I was wanting to know specifically. Well, we know my cervix is jacked up from scarring due to cryo surgery, I asked her last time to massage it away and she flat refused. That's why I couldn't dilate, I had no help and no advocate. Now? I'm not playing that shiz. So the next few visits when I come to see her I will request a cervical massage to help prep my body for what it's already supposed to do on it's own.
I told her I want a VBAC friendly L&D nurse and if I get one that isn't, I'll be calling her and requesting a new nurse. I want one who will assist me in making this situation the most VBAC friendly environment I can. She said I should labor at home for as long as I am able to stand the pain, come in when my contractions are 5 minutes apart, a minute in length, increasing in strength and lasting well beyond an hour. Active labor won't get me sent home. She will consent to me being sent home several times in order to promote a VBAC environment.
I did say I am not against medical interventions or even a c-section, until it's medically necessary but I won't be signing a damn thing till we get to that point. I told her I have a 13 month old that will be walking by then, not a lot of maternity leave and I need to be in the best shape I can be post partum to take care of both my youngest babies. Being landed with another surgery will set me back quite a bit.
I think she finally gets I'm not playing. All I wanted to begin with was a compromise. At the next appt I will ask her about her opinions of a natural c-section if she sees things going bad quickly with the baby and I.
As a patient that has been with her for so long, I don't think it should have come to me being a biitch at my appt. But I did see that she's more than willing to allow me what I've asked for,
Ladies, don't give up. Please speak your mind. I think our OB's have gotten used to moms that say yes to anything just because it comes from their mouths. If we want a say in our births, our babies and our bodies we need to speak up.
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Re: My OB seems to be on board with a VBAC attemp and TOL. (vent..long)
Wow! Good for you!
And you are spot on with that last paragraph--I couldn't agree more.
Thank you so much! If it weren't for you and other ladies here I wouldn't have had the nerve to tell her how I felt. I would have sulked from here till the end and accepted her way of how things should be. Not anymore. DH tried to suck up to me at lunch, not buying it buddy. He thinks I'm going to die and the baby is going to die from a VBAC. I feel very alone in my decision since he doesn't come with me to appts. When I tried to talk to him about this he just laughs at me and rolls his eyes like it's not different than buying a pair of shoes, no big deal. It is a big deal. I told my OB this is something I need to do, for me, so I can start healing emotionally.
Hellz yeah!! You go girl. That is basically what I did. I wasn't wiling to switch practitioners until they knew exactly what I wanted and if I knew for sure their stance on things. I know they respect me a lot more since I am an informed patient that knows my rights and desires.
I am so happy for you. Good job!