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IL's who don't get it!

allyg1006allyg1006 member
in Cloth Diapering

I am sure that at least one of you understands where I am coming from.

DH and I plan to CD and breastfeed our LO (our first, due Aug 2). When I shared my desires to exclusively breastfeed and CD, my IL's went on a rant about how "weird" and "gross" it is. DH's aunt said, "Well don't expect me to change that baby's diaper" and I came ---this--- close to saying, "Oh trust me! My child will never be in your care long enough for you to worry about it!"

I may have high hopes for wanting to BF and CD with our first. I am pretty astute, grad-school educated business woman who has researched and researched both of these things. Anyone else FRUSTRATED with people who don't understand and don't care to know why you're so passionate about it? I know my way may not be best, but don't tell me it's wrong... especially when you neither BF'd or CD'd. You know?

 Ahhhh. I feel better. Since I can't go home and down a bottle of wine, I needed to rant a little. :)

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Re: IL's who don't get it!

  • Kim72508Kim72508
    Just know that most people won't "get it" but they don't have to live in your house, raise your child, feed your child, or diaper your child.  Do what works for your family and ignore those who aren't supportive.  They will eventually stop making comments.....
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  • Dr.LorettaDr.Loretta member
    This is why I didn't proclaim my intentions to friends or family. It's much easier to just do what you want to do and let them get with the program when they come to visit.
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  • humynonehumynone

    I think it's funny that people think it's "so weird"...when it's really not all that different then bottles and disposables. Milk goes in baby, poo comes out. Diaper velcros on, diaper velcros off. repeat.

    Don't feel bad about your decisions. Breast milk is the best nutrition you can provide LO, along with all the great immune benefits. And cloth diapering rocks! They work great if not better, they save a ton of money, and they are healthier for baby's bottom and the environment. For me, I can't understand how its not a no-brainier for more folks!

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  • pixy_stixpixy_stix member
    Most people who see the new style of cds eat their words.  MIL didn't understand until I showed her one, and then she shut up.
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  • yodasmistressyodasmistress member
    I didn't even bother telling friends an family were going to CD 0 I didn't want to listen to their nonsense!
     
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  • BlackvelvetBlackvelvet member
    I have to say it's hard get support for either but it was easier to change minds about the diapers then the BF.  Most people are willing to do the diapering now but my IL's are still afraid of BF they leave and I don't care anymore that is their problem.  My mom buys disposibles when ever she has to watch DS she will not use cloth though she loves to buy them for me just will not take cloth of DS (she is willing to put on cloth just not take off)
    Me DOR amh .64 ng/mL  
    DH Brain Cancer
    BFP #1 12/11/08 DS born 8/23/09
    BFP#2 10/13/11 DC 11/4/11
    BFP#3 12/6/13 Lost 12/29/13
    Told IVF is the only option and have not found a clinic that will take me.



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  • RobinSparkles214RobinSparkles214 member

    It may be best just to not discuss the things that you plan on doing with them. I know that everyone (my side of the family) thought I was crazy for wanting to CD, but now they are all supportive.

    Also, I always wonder why random family members assume that we would even ever ask them to change our childs diaper. So weird. Don't worry they'll get over it when they see you've stuck with it.

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  • allyg1006allyg1006 member

    Thanks, ladies.

    I think from now on, I'm not sharing with others what DH and I plan to do. Honestly, when I talk about it because I (naively, I guess) assume people will understand, be support, etc. Since that's apparently not the case, they can just figure it out when they come to visit! 

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  • pandi02apandi02a member

    I didn't want to tell anyone our plans but, living in Germany, when I ordered my CDs to pick up while we were in the US for Christmas, I had to send them to my MIL's house. Of course, she opened all of our mail/packages after we even asked her not to. Oh well. I really don't care what she thinks. FIL also said something about it, once, but I showed him the diaper (a pocket) and explained it to him and he seemed like he changed his mind and thought it was a great idea.

    You just can't care too much about other people's opinions. 

    I just hate when everyone says, "I give you a week." Well, I'm going to prove them wrong. 

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  • hairpastahairpasta

    In my experience, being a parent opens you up to a ton of criticism (or maybe it's just my MIL). I was sensitive to it when I was pregnant because I was nervous and unsure of myself. Once I had DD I stopped caring because I knew what was best and was going to do it no matter what people said. Don't worry about it. People can be so negative, but they are all clueless when it comes to your family and your child.

    My MIL loves my cloth now, but now there are new things to comment on. Never really ends.

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  • IrishBrideNDIrishBrideND member
    most people didn't get it while I was pregnant. Once LO was here, and they saw how it all worked, they've all jumped on the bandwagon.
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