How long to wait until TTC

LindsayFD82 · January 2011

Hi all!

I was wondering how long everyone waited after getting married to start TTC?

My DH and I have been married for 7 months and have discussed waiting at least until our 1st anniversary to start TTC. I always thought I wanted time to adjust to marriage before we started a family. The last few days though I have not been able to think of anything else.

doozer1345 · January 2011

We can't tell you when you and your DH should TTC. Everyone is different. But, I will say it needs to be a mutual decision between both of you. It's best if you're financially, and mentally ready. TTC does take a toll on your relationship sometimes, but the decision is only yours and your DH's. GL

Julz629 · January 2011

Originally, we talked about waiting until our year anniversary (September). But I want to start sooner rather than later... I have two weddings that I am in this summer and I am thinking we'll wait til after those (June). I am not on BC and while we are charting and TTA, we would welcome any surprises. :-)

happilyeverafterxo · January 2011

Hello

I find myself really relating to what you just said. My husband and I got married this past July. Actually, tomorrow will be our 6 month mark. We are both financially stable and ready for a family any time. In my opinion, there is no right or wrong time to TTC. It is different for everyone

Just make sure that you are both ready for the responsibilities and stable both emotionally and financially. (I've had baby fever the past few months, as well) Best wishes!

pinksweetpea2 · January 2011

We started the cycle after we got back from our honeymoon...but we were in our late 20s (I gave birth at 30), owned a house, and were together for 4.5 years before we got married. It took 5 cycles and 6 months to get pregnant.

Even with all the above we had a really difficult first year together as parents. I think it really depends on you, your DH and your relationship.

liz_t · January 2011

Almost 5 years. We traveled, we spent money on fun restaurants, we furnished and renovated our house, we spent time being a young married couple having fun with our other young married (and unmarried) friends, etc.

Spending time together and having fun together for a little while was the best decision for us. That doesn't mean it's the best decision for you. Good luck with whatever you and YH decide.

HappyAardvark · January 2011

I'm not in the norm, I think, but DH and I waited until around our 5th year anniversary to TTC. We just were in no rush... you can never go back to it just being you and your DH once you have a baby and family, and we wanted to cherish that time together as just the two of us, being selfish, spending money on stupid things, sleeping in late, drinking too much

etc. We're ready now and I don't feel like we missed out on anything by jumping into mommy/daddy mode too quickly into our marriage.

HBaylies · January 2011

For my husband and I, we were married for 15 months before we started trying and then it took until 23 months before we actually got pregnant. It was a frustrating time for us and surely tested our new marriage as months passed with no success. Now that our son is 5 months old, I think we are the happiest we have ever been and aren't using birth contol is hopes that we can have another sometime soon. The decision is so very personal though. You and your husband have to do what's right for the two of you.

MrsRexManning · January 2011

We aren't married yet, but we know we want to be together so we are trying now since I want to have a baby before I am 26. Good Luck to you!

adrenalinejnke27 · January 2011

Like everyone said so far, this is a very personal decision. You and your husband need to decide what is best for your family.

DH and I were married in June of this year and started TTC in August. We have been dating for 12 years now though, so we weren't as worried about getting adjusted to living together and all that.

Best of luck on your decision!

meangieman · January 2011

My DH and I waited until we were married for almost 2 years to start TTC but then didn't get pregnant until a year later. We got married when we were only 21 and 22 so we had time to waste also. Like others have said make sure you are both ready TTC can sometimes be very stressful

WVUdebateteacher · January 2011

I don't really know anyone on here yet, but I'll chime in! I feel like my husband and I waited for quite a while because it was what was right for us. We have been married for nearly 6 1/2 years and I turned 30 last fall.

I have seen my younger sister have two beautiful babies and have been asked by countless friends and family members why we don't have a child yet. All the while, I knew the only people in the baby-decision-making equation were my husband and I. I never felt rushed and I know waiting was the right decision for us. We have enjoyed our "couple time" so much! That being said, I echo the previous posters sentiments. This is a tremendously personal decision. Only you and your H can make the choice that is right for you!

pfritsche · January 2011

I've been ready for a baby since day 1, DH hasn't always been on board. He's an enthusiast now, but it's taken a couple of years to really warm up to the idea of taking the risk and making a baby. We've got a good 4.5 years under our belt living together, and I feel really confident that we're strong enough to support each other and be a good team as parents. He did ask me for a year after our wedding to wait to TTC, because he wanted to enjoy me as "just his wife" for a little while before we brought a third into the family.

Hitting the year mark was scary; we actually chickened out for six more months and just enjoyed being us some more. We were much more relaxed and happy when we went off of BCP finally because we gave ourselves a little extra time to think.

funkatronjive · January 2011

We found out we were pregnant 2 days before our 1st Annversairy and I wouldnt have it any other way.... we started trying 4 months before that.... we had been together for 6 years before we got married so it was definitely time to start thinking about a family.

onesandtwos · January 2011

We're in about the same boat as you! We initially wanted to have at least a year to ourselves, but right around our 6-month mark, we realized that we want to be parents in the worst way! The timing seems great, so we decided to ignore our parents' advice (to wait at least 5 years) and go for it! Our first official TTC cycle was during our 7th month of marriage. Ultimately, we realized that we had to do what felt right for us--not what our friends and family thought was a good idea. Good luck to you!

watkinae · January 2011

DH and I have been married since May and we started TTC in September. I've always wanted to wait a year after marriage before TTC, but I'm 30, he's 29 and we wanted to start the baby making process just in case it didn't happen right away. It's a good thing we didn't wait until next May, hoping that we'd conceive immediately after getting off BC, b/c now we're on cycle #5.

michaela080 · January 2011

We got married in June and started right away. We have lived together for 2.5 years. We are both a bit older (I'm 30, he's 35). I thought we were going to wait a year, but DH wanted to start right away out of the blue!

TBBrooks · January 2011

Like everyone else has said, it depends on you and your husband. No one can tell you what's right for you.

We've been married for about 6 months and are starting to actively TTC. But, we've also been friends for 14 years, have been together for over 4 years, own a home, have stable careers, etc. We want a large family and always knew that we would start trying soon after getting married. My friend, on the other hand, has been married for 6 years and doesn't want to start TTC until this summer. Neither of us is right or wrong... it a personal choice.

TBBrooks · January 2011

Like everyone else has said, it depends on you and your husband. No one can tell you what's right for you.

We've been married for about 6 months and are starting to actively TTC. But, we've also been friends for 14 years, have been together for over 4 years, own a home, have stable careers, etc. We want a large family and always knew that we would start trying soon after getting married. My friend, on the other hand, has been married for 6 years and doesn't want to start TTC until this summer. Neither of us is right or wrong... it's a personal choice.

[Deleted User] · January 2011

I think it's important that both you and YH are really ready, and neither of you is coercing the other one into it. It's a decision the both of you need to make together.

rianals · January 2011

I agree that you and YH need to decide when it is right for you.

But, since you asked, I went off the pill about two weeks after we got married and we started TTC three months later. I got pregnant the first month that we were trying. Although we started TTC very early in our marriage, we had lived together for seven years before we got married.

Julie822 · January 2011

We have been married for 3.5 years. We have been together since high school, so we got married relatively young, before we had life really figured out. We wanted to make sure we were financially stable before trying to have kids. I think there are different priorities that need to be met before you get married vs having kids, so it kind of will depend on your personal situation. But it is definitely not something to rush into!

Jing22 · January 2011

We waited about 4 years. We had to get ourselves financially ready.

keelmic · January 2011

We got married in Dec 2008 and DH wanted to wait a year before we began trying. (I'm 31, he's 30). I talked him into trying after 10 months, not one year. Here we are 15 months later and still no pregnancy in site. I wish we had started trying a little earlier since it is taking longer than anticipated.

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