I escaped.... And I took my hormones with me

kinibruin · January 2011

Hi all. I'm mobile posting from safeway. Haha so sorry for formatting issues. I feel like a monster. MH just irked me this evening & I just about lost it. Granted, I know I was maybe hard on him. But something in me just snapped. So now it's close to 11 pm & I'm sitting in safeway. I feel so out of control at times and I just don't know how to keep these hormones in check. I'm f-ing moody and I feel like a monster. Does anyone know this feeling? If so, how did you cope? I don't want to go home, but I'm gonna have to. I think I'll stay here as long as I can though.

Married2MrWright · January 2011

Oh honey...BIG hugs...I have SO been there! And it's a horrible feeling because, yes, it feels bigger than yourself and even while you're feeling angry or upset somewhere inside your head you know that it's probably the hormones but at the same time you cannot stop it. I cried A LOT when I was PG and afterwards and also got PO'd my fair share too. Hang in their mama and take care of yourself...stepping out of your situation to catch a breather was the right thing to do. Hopefully DH will understand. Tell him you needed a "time out"!

KShiz · January 2011

Married2MrWright:
Oh honey...BIG hugs...I have SO been there! And it's a horrible feeling because, yes, it feels bigger than yourself and even while you're feeling angry or upset somewhere inside your head you know that it's probably the hormones but at the same time you cannot stop it. I cried A LOT when I was PG and afterwards and also got PO'd my fair share too. Hang in their mama and take care of yourself...stepping out of your situation to catch a breather was the right thing to do. Hopefully DH will understand. Tell him you needed a "time out"!

Agreed. I don't try to fake it anymore or put on a happy face. For me, trying to act like I'm happy when I'm not is exhausting and only prolongs my bad mood.

MrsNJSwimmer · January 2011

KShiz:

Agreed. I don't try to fake it anymore or put on a happy face. For me, trying to act like I'm happy when I'm not is exhausting and only prolongs my bad mood.

ditto to this. I usually just went into the other room and cried, but sometimes I would go to my office at work! It's SO hard! I hope you feel better soon.

kinibruin · January 2011

Hi all! I ended calling my gf in the area & went to her house. She's had 2 high risk pgs too. I stayed until about 1! Haha she mentioned pregnancy is difficult enough, and to be high risk is even more stressful. So while some of it is hormones, some is also circumstances. I think I've been hard on myself, trying to do it all that I can and like pp said, try to keep it altogether.

thank you for your reassurances. It means SO much to me because it helps to not feel alone. And it helps to know I'm normal! I love you guys!!!

mrspresley · January 2011

awww i'm sorry! i know you have not had it easy as far as pregnancies go! the big thing is that you aware of your feelings and are able to step away so it doesn't escalate. i'm glad you had time time away to cool off. hopefully your hubby understands

jaysgirljulie · January 2011

Good for you for getting out of situation! I hope that on this new day everything seems better. My hormones were under control while I was pg but they hit hard after I gave birth. It was like I saved it all up and let unleash all at one time or something.

inamra · January 2011

Awww, sorry you had a rough night, but good thing you were able to go to your friend's place and talk it through with her. It's hard already going through pregnancy and all those hormonal changes, and you add on any sort of complications during the process and it's really taxing on you! There were times when I told MH to stay out of the bedroom (where I was resting) because I had to be alone. And it'll be rough during those times, but YH will understand (eventually =P). But I hope you're feeling better now!

kinibruin · January 2011

Mobile posting again...I was feeling guilty for leaving but I see how the alone time just helps with the cooling off. MH was worried but then he texted me.

tonight I explained I needed the "timeout" for myself & he understood. I told him I might get more emotional as the delivery date gets closer or even after baby is here. But that space is just time for me to clear my head.

I think he gets it. We shall see. HAhaha

part of what makes it difficult is that people tell me not to feel sad/angry/emotional because the baby can feel it. So I tend to put that face & hold it in because I don't want the baby to feel it. But if you guys said that you cried during pg & you're babies are all happy beautiful babies, then it assures me that my feelings won't be so bad....

MrsNJSwimmer · January 2011

kinibruin:
Mobile posting again...I was feeling guilty for leaving but I see how the alone time just helps with the cooling off. MH was worried but then he texted me.

tonight I explained I needed the "timeout" for myself & he understood. I told him I might get more emotional as the delivery date gets closer or even after baby is here. But that space is just time for me to clear my head.

I think he gets it. We shall see. HAhaha

part of what makes it difficult is that people tell me not to feel sad/angry/emotional because the baby can feel it. So I tend to put that face & hold it in because I don't want the baby to feel it. But if you guys said that you cried during pg & you're babies are all happy beautiful babies, then it assures me that my feelings won't be so bad....

I think you just need to feel however you feel! It's ok. I think if you bottle it up and try to hold it in, it just makes it worse, b/c then you REALLY start to feel horrible, and I think the stress of that is far worse on the baby! You are doing the best you can - hang in there!

lelekay · January 2011

MrsNJSwimmer:
kinibruin:
Mobile posting again...I was feeling guilty for leaving but I see how the alone time just helps with the cooling off. MH was worried but then he texted me.

tonight I explained I needed the "timeout" for myself & he understood. I told him I might get more emotional as the delivery date gets closer or even after baby is here. But that space is just time for me to clear my head.

I think he gets it. We shall see. HAhaha

part of what makes it difficult is that people tell me not to feel sad/angry/emotional because the baby can feel it. So I tend to put that face & hold it in because I don't want the baby to feel it. But if you guys said that you cried during pg & you're babies are all happy beautiful babies, then it assures me that my feelings won't be so bad....

I think you just need to feel however you feel! It's ok. I think if you bottle it up and try to hold it in, it just makes it worse, b/c then you REALLY start to feel horrible, and I think the stress of that is far worse on the baby! You are doing the best you can - hang in there!

That's just what I was thinking. If that's true, then I think that baby would be better off having you feel your true emotions and release them, rather than bottle them up for a longer period of time and really stress about them. I find release by a good short cry and temporary "time-out" for myself to be very cathartic, which I think would be better for the baby in the long run! Smile

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