Why does everyone ask about following Dr's orders on waiting?

noah-bear · January 2011

I mean, aren't they 'orders' for a reason? I just don't get it.

It's not like they pull a number out of a hat. They don't pull lottery number balls from a machine. They don't do it to be mean.

One cycle, not that hard

Two cycles, sure, maybe a bit difficult because you want to try again.

But come on!

Sorry, I'm PMS'ing a bit and the "how long did you wait" "did you follow Dr's orders" gets asked every day it seems.

MandaS08 · January 2011

I was just thinking this! I know waiting is hard, but doesn't it make sense to follow your doctors instead of trying to rely on internet people that don't have medical degrees?

Jo&Matt6609 · January 2011

noah-bear:

I mean, aren't they 'orders' for a reason? I just don't get it.

It's not like they pull a number out of a hat. They don't pull lottery number balls from a machine. They don't do it to be mean.

One cycle, not that hard

Two cycles, sure, maybe a bit difficult because you want to try again.

But come on!

Sorry, I'm PMS'ing a bit and the "how long did you wait" "did you follow Dr's orders" gets asked every day it seems.

Yes

ginamcp · January 2011

I have my b*tch hat on today so I will put it out there and say its because everyone is a special snowflake and they want to start now now now *footstomp*. We waited more than the required 1 cycle because I just wasn't ready emotionally yet.

cubsgirl13 · January 2011

Hah! I was thinking the exact same thing!

myaddiwaddi06 · January 2011

I don't really get it either. I mean why go to a dr if you aren't going to listen anyway? This is getting asked more and more.

millejj1 · January 2011

Because they want to feel justified in not listening to the doctor duh...

If people on the internet say they didn't listen to the doctor than surely it's ok for them not to as well.

(apparently I have on my snark hat today)

emeraudecephiro · January 2011

Maybe I need to add on the blog about this...on how it is important to follow these directions.

As for not trusting the doctor, before restarting TTC find a new one and get a second opinion before starting, I'd say.

butterfly843 · January 2011

millejj1 · January 2011

theresat858:
Because not all of us are fortunate enough to have doctors that we can trust.
If my doctor has to ask me 'how I knew I was pregnant' in a tone that implies maybe I never was when there is an ultrasound result from two weeks previously showing a (then-)viable pregnancy on the chart in front of his face, I lose confidence in his ability to practice medicine.
Which is why I am finding another doctor before listening to him tell me to wait 2 cycles when I am fairly certain there is no medical reason for it.

I agree with wanting some more information in this case, although, I would think finding a new doctor would come before the TTC part. You will hear everything from no need to wait, to wait 3-4 cycles, to wait until you're emotionally ready when looking at the question. There is no magic answer so it's hard when we hear people ask it all the time.

SarahCee · January 2011

I asked because it seems to me like every doctor gives different advice, even if the dx's are the same. I was genuinely curious about your stances on the subject, since I'm sure most of you are pretty well versed on it. I had no idea that this was such a common (and annoying) question to ask; I don't have time to read every single post. I included in my OP that I was in fact going to have my OB clarify as to why she wants us to wait, but was wondering what your experiences are with this.

Doctors are just humans, most of which are over-booked with appointments. I value their oppinions, and usually follow their advice when it's sound. But on this particular subject, I have yet to see a black and white answer.

Izabella22 · January 2011

emeraudecephiro:

Maybe I need to add on the blog about this...on how it is important to follow these directions. I think this is a great idea.

As for not trusting the doctor, before restarting TTC find a new one and get a second opinion before starting, I'd say. This.

Or maybe its because we have magic ute goggles and can tell them everything looks good to go. We're all TTCALMD's - we should have a badge! We are WAY more reliable than regular doctors! Fooey on the 8 years of extra schooling - you just need to be a regular here!

Sara&Mike07 · January 2011

Seriously! Yes

mandy6418 · January 2011

Yeah, I'll never understand that. Your Dr obviously told you to wait that long for a reason. It's in yours and your future child's best interest to wait.

noah-bear · January 2011

SarahCee:
Doctors are just humans, most of which are over-booked with appointments. I value their oppinions, and usually follow their advice when it's sound. But on this particular subject, I have yet to see a black and white answer.

Yes they're humans, but the're well educated humans. They deal with pregnancies, losses, and everything dealing with getting and staying pregnant. I cannot base when My body is ready for another pregnancy, my Dr can. I cannot look into my uterus and say "ok, you look good enough to carry a baby", my Dr can. My dr is the one who knows the most recent studies, ideas and what not. Not me. I'm not a Dr, that's why I pay someone else to stick me with needles, read the charts and poke around in my uterus.

A loss is a loss, it doesn't make it the same as everyone else. Mine was different from every other person, no matter how similar the symptoms, complications and medications were. If two people lost a baby at 5 weeks, both had bleeding, both never saw a heartbeat, both had a natural m/c and both saw the same dr, they are not the same.

Runnergirl2242 · January 2011

I may totally get flamed but I have to admit that was my very first question posted to this board. I just really wanted to know what other doctors told their patients. My doc actually told me about the two different ideas out there and let me choose for the first one. She suggested I wait until at least one cycle but stated that there were no studies to back this urge. So I did not wait and I had a second miscarriage...possibly related or maybe not. I will never really know. This time it was not a suggestion that I wait two cycles it was her orders bc of methotrexate shots and I followed. But I still really wanted to know what others were doing. I also needed the encouragement that waiting these cycles would not take forever. It feels like a couple cycles is forever when all you want is to be pregnant again.

BabyTrippin · January 2011

A) My stance is do whatever the heck you feel like doing. Your ute, your choice. But in making that choice, be sure you can live with all possible outcomes of that choice. That includes the crushing guilt you will feel if you ignore doctor's orders and miscarry again.

I don't have time to read every post either, but I still manage to find the posts that are relevant and interesting to me. I didn't waltz in here and start blasting off questions to people I didn't care to get to know.

C) I wonder how many of the posters who come in asking all kinds of questions without so much as a ((hug)) or a that sucks to the ones struggling that day are like that in person? I don't use my friends, or coworkers that way. It is kind of wearing me down that I'm (we're) being used that way.

pumpkinhead4 · January 2011

I think we need to remember everyone is different and so was their loss. I am sure some women who had a loss without needing a d & c are told they can try sooner, at least in what I have heard. I had a d & c and was told to wait 3-4 cycles because of the procedure performed. Plus, I think doctor's give a time frame for emotional healing as well. It's like if you have a baby and they tell you not to get pregnant right away, your body needs a break. Anyway, this question shouldn't be put out to the group because we don't know your specific circumstance.

Take some time to heal physically and mentally and use your best judgement and instincts...yikes. The first thing a doctor will say to you if you question them is "get off the internet!" haha!

katiebug2004 · January 2011

I hear ya.

I WISH I had gotten the 1-2 cycle wait time...hearing "you will need to go back on the pill for 6 months to a year" was a real kick in the pants.

Do what the doc says folks...

ColleenS629 · January 2011

BabyTrippin:
A) My stance is do whatever the heck you feel like doing. Your ute, your choice. But in making that choice, be sure you can live with all possible outcomes of that choice. That includes the crushing guilt you will feel if you ignore doctor's orders and miscarry again.
I don't have time to read every post either, but I still manage to find the posts that are relevant and interesting to me. I didn't waltz in here and start blasting off questions to people I didn't care to get to know.
C) I wonder how many of the posters who come in asking all kinds of questions without so much as a ((hug)) or a that sucks to the ones struggling that day are like that in person? I don't use my friends, or coworkers that way. It is kind of wearing me down that I'm (we're) being used that way.

This. If you're going to disobey doctor's orders, that's your choice. Don't come to us to ease your guilt. We didn't go to med school.

LilMaggs · January 2011

ColleenS629:
BabyTrippin:
A) My stance is do whatever the heck you feel like doing. Your ute, your choice. But in making that choice, be sure you can live with all possible outcomes of that choice. That includes the crushing guilt you will feel if you ignore doctor's orders and miscarry again.
I don't have time to read every post either, but I still manage to find the posts that are relevant and interesting to me. I didn't waltz in here and start blasting off questions to people I didn't care to get to know.
C) I wonder how many of the posters who come in asking all kinds of questions without so much as a ((hug)) or a that sucks to the ones struggling that day are like that in person? I don't use my friends, or coworkers that way. It is kind of wearing me down that I'm (we're) being used that way.
This. If you're going to disobey doctor's orders, that's your choice. Don't come to us to ease your guilt. We didn't go to med school.

This, exactly. I don't even bother with these questions anymore. It gets asked so often that if the poster bothered to look, it wouldn't be hard to find. Lurk for a day or two at minimum, and you will find that most of the basic questions are answered.

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Why does everyone ask about following Dr's orders on waiting?

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