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Trying to enjoy the new year but...

Pearly609Pearly609
in 2nd Trimester

I lost my mom on new years and its so painful. I'm sure the pregnancy doesn't help. I'm home alone so that doesn't make it better.  It has gotten easier to deal with but accepting it seems weird.  It wasn't expected.  I spoke with her new years eve and I got the call new years early morning that she passed.  She was fine when we spoke. Who thinks they will loose their love one especially their mother. 

If you have a mother, even if you don't get along, please find a way to overlook their imperfections.  I would give anything to have her here with me.  It hurts so bad. She made blankets for all of my children and this one won't have one from her.

I'm just venting as there isn't anyone here to vent to. My SO is traveling and my kids had plans today which is fine.  Hopefully the new year will bring everyone something good (well the babies born definitely is good). And maybe we can learn to love a little harder to those that hurt us, even if we have to love from a distance.

Just writing this made me feel better.  Hopefully it stays this way.

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Re: Trying to enjoy the new year but...

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    alilanalilan
    **hugs**
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    sarahns80sarahns80 member
    I am so sorry you are dealing with this alone. I would turn on *** Clark's NYE and watch the ball drop on TV and try to focus on all the blessings in your life. I lost my only sister a year and a half ago and it gets better but I know the pain never goes away. I don't know if you are a believer but I am and I believe my sister is in a better place and we will see her again one day. I definitely learned to love harder with my sister's passing b/c I didn't give her enough time. It's true that you never know when someone will not be here anymore. I pray for God to comfort you and that you have joy and peace now and in the new year. I know your mom would want that too!
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    jengonjengon
    I am very sorry for your loss. I also lost my mom a few years ago. Not on new years but a couple days before her birthday. I spoke with her the day before and we had the longest best conversation ever. I remember thinking how good it felt. Then the next day I got a call saying she had a heart attack in her sleep. Very hard stuff to deal with. You really should keep yourself busy in some way. Of course nothing takes the pain away, but it does make it easier to deal with. ((hugs))
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    Pearly609Pearly609
    Thank you both and sorry to hear about your losses. Looking forward to the New Year and the things it will bring. Party!!!
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