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3rd Trimester
HoolahZinger
member
EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves
Early pregnancy announcements
HoolahZinger
member
It makes me so sad when people post about pregnancies so dang early all over FB only to find out that it didn't work out. I know to each her own but why would you make such a big announcement at 6 weeks when there's just so much risk that early??? I know that it's exciting but 
I just feel so sad for my friends right now.
I just feel so sad for my friends right now. EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves
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Re: Early pregnancy announcements
I agree with this. I remember being so frustrated when people would judge how long I waited to tell. I lost 2 pregnancies trying for DS. One loss was after 12w along. We didn't tell anyone we were pg with DS until I was 16wks - with most finding out around 18-20wks. This time we waited to tell everyone until about 15wks.
People would often say "if it were me, I would have..." My response "well, it wasn't you and it's never happened to you, you really have no idea."
Our best friends were the complete opposite - I knew she was pg at like 3w and some odd days. It's what worked for them.
DD - February 2011
Be sad about the loss, but not that they shared. I don't think you mean it this way, but what you wrote comes across as that people shouldn't share their PG news so you don't have to be sad about their losses--as if they should be keeping their loss a secret.
Different people need different levels of sharing the good and the bad. There is no way to jinx a pregnancy, so sharing all comes down to personal preference. I kept my loss very private and there was a definite downside to that. I don't know that I would be as private again.
More Green For Less Green
I announced it at 8 weeks but only because we had an u/s. I felt comfortable at that point but looking back I realize how insanely early that was. I also had kept it quiet for 5 weeks and seeing LOs hb I couldn't hold it in anymore so I exploded pretty much. Besides, at that point, it was starting to leak out to everyone anyways.
The girls who announce it the second they POAS make me nervous for them. I have already seen a couple ladies do just that and end up having a chemical PG.
That was the case here. I guess my post came out wrong to some people. I don't see an issue to telling close family and friends but to the whole of Facebook seems to be a bit much. I know that it is exciting to get a positive but I guess it would be worse for me, personally to tell every single person I know and then have to tell people about a miscarriage right after...or a chemical PG - which was the case for these two. My apologies for any I offended.
EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves
wow, I didn't know people did that!
Yeahhhhh, make it through the first tri, at least before you post to the entire world. That said, I never announced the pregnancy on FB. I just told the friends I wanted to tell in person, via phone or email. There could be a lot of surprised FB friends on LO's birthday!
ETA: telling people before the end of first tri is up to the parents. We told our parents at 5 weeks, and our local friends at just shy of 8. They would've been our support system if something had gone south. It's the massive public announcement so early that I give the side eye too.
We told our parents, and I told work - because at the time I worked around anesthesia - when we found out which was ~5ish weeks along.
I did not want to tell anyone else until 12 weeks for this reason but my husband couldn't contain himself and announced it on FB.
Honestly though it's a personal decision, for sure. I have a friend who recently miscarried and I didn't even know she was pregnant. She fell off of the face of the Earth and I was worried about her! She told me when she was ready.
We told our family that we were pregnant at 5 weeks and told close friends in the 7-9 week range; however, I waited until 16 weeks to announce it on FB. I know that everyone is entitled to announce their pregnancy in whatever way they feel comfortable, but I can't help being nervous for them when I see people announce it before first trimester is over. That said, I have friends who lost their baby at 22 weeks, so I guess you just never know what's going to happen. They had been posting about the pregnancy on FB (once first tri ended) and I think it was tough to have to post that they had lost the baby. But then again, they got a lot of support that way, too.
I know another girl who has had multiple miscarriages and posted early on FB in the past. She is pregnant again... posted early... and things seem to be going well this time (I think her first tri just ended), but every time I see her talking about the pregnancy I just hope that it works out this time. For me personally, if I had had losses in the past, I would be hesitant to post anything early.
I had a very hard time keeping the pregnancy secret from anyone I saw in person after our BFP. As soon as we heard the heartbeat on the doppler, I posted the annoucement on FB.
My dad, on the other hand, just started telling his family because my parents lost twins at 27 weeks and he didn't want to jinx us. I assured him that survival rate at this point in a NICU is 90%, so he felt better about that.
I announced my first pregnancy shortly after we found out and while untelling everyone was difficult, I don't regret telling them.
That being said, I thought about it long and hard before making the decision to tell everyone. Personally, if someone makes the decision to tell, they need to be prepared for that chance.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.