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2nd Trimester
catherine225
member
Competitive women - UGH!
catherine225
member
Hi all,
This is my first time posting on 2nd tri... 1st tri board was so helpful when I first found out I was pregnant.
I know I'm extra sensitive right now, but I just need to vent. Perhaps other ladies can join me in my b*tch session. 
How annoying is it when women are competitive about pregnancy/mom things? Let me give you an example:
A friend of mine is currently 34 weeks pregnant. Yesterday she posts on Facebook how she has only gained 16 pounds and when people comment, she goes on to say how "she doesn't put garbage in her body," etc, etc. I'm sure she's proud, but this is just one of the examples.
I have tons of people telling me about THEIR doctors, THEIR labor, THEIR diapers, and the list goes on. I get that some are trying to be helpful and I definitely appreciate recommendations, but for many of these people I know that they do not have an interest in helping me...they just want validation that they are the best pregnant lady/mom/woman out there. I leave most of these conversations feeling about one inch tall.
Any similar experiences?
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Re: Competitive women - UGH!
Everyone wants to special and the center of attention when they are preggo. Who cares if she only gained 16 lbs? I don't worry about what anyone else is doing except me and my baby. It's not my problem. Can't let over-competative women who didn't get enough attention as children get you down. F' em!
Someone once told me, long ago, and it has stuck with me:
It takes two people to have a competition.
So, if you don't want to compete, don't. I make my choices and my decisions based on my thoughts and feelings, noone elses. I feel bad for people who go through life needing validation.
It would be a cold day in hell before I would post anything about my weight, good or bad, on facebook!
A lot of people over share about lots of things. My friends and I usually just make fun of people like that, so now I'm paranoid and basically share nothing about this baby, lol.
Similar exeriences? Always. I try to stay away from women like that. I keep my conversations with them short and brief. You can choose to ignore...OR...you can make a comment like "Everyone is different." But ignoring definitely helps. I've just walked away from women like that. And I don't feel bad about it. It's obnoxious and a waste of my time.
One of my favorite observations on life that I always try to remember: there is a difference between people telling their own stories and them judging yours. I also like PP's comment about how it takes two to compete. Train yourself to choose how you filter things and it will make life so much easier.
More Green For Less Green
I have to add that it isn't going to stop after you have the baby. Then people will be competitive about what they feed their babies, what kind of clothes they buy for their babies, how often they bathe their babies, etc....
IT's one of the joys of becoming a parent.
Everyone judges you and has an opinion on how you should do things, including how fast you should lose baby weight and when or if you should have more children!