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3rd Trimester
OT Vent:
Don't get me wrong, I love my DH BUT...
He is the cheapest most inconsiderate man in the world sometimes. We just bought a house, and I'm 29 weeks with our first baby he's always been "careful" with money and I respect that. I understand things are tight right now but tomorrow is NYE and I want to go out. I don't want to cook dinner, clean the house, and go to bed at 10 I do that 6 nights a week. I want to get dolled up put on a cute outfit and some heels (or flats) and go out for dinner or for dessert!
He says dinner is too expensive and he's on a health kick right now so dessert is out for him (which means it's out for me too). I just feel like he doesn't think I am worth spending money on, like I don't deserve to be treated once and a while. I told him that if he doesn't want to take me out then he can cook because I am tired of it. He said fine he will cook, but that still means I will be stuck at home all night.
Am I being a princess? or is it really not fair? If I bring it up to him he just rolls his eyes and makes be feel like I am a nag or he'll say I am just being emotional because I'm pregnant. I am concerned because if things are like this now I know it will be worse when the lo comes since we will have less money while I'm off work.
I love him to death I really do but it just kills me that he's like this! Even other people notice how cheap he is and they can't beleive how rude he can be when I ask him to drive me somewhere (even to the grocery store!) I don't even have a car because he thinks we can't afford a seccond one so I have to bus or scrounge rides because I am afraid to ask him for fear of annoying him! Maybe my expectations are too high... I don't know.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: OT Vent:
I agree with PP. Maybe try to compromise with him and say that you want to go out/get dolled up, but just for appetizers or salad? However, I would be frustrated too if my DH didn't want to splurge on me for a night. You're growing a baby! You deserve some pampering!
And I think you should definitely talk to him about the driving thing. You should not be intimidated to ask him for rides. He's your DH, you're pregnant, it's part of his responsibility to help get you safely to your destinations. He needs to understand that it's not your hormones making you act up, this is how you truly feel.
I like PPs idea of maybe showing/telling him exactly what you posted. Maybe it will make something click in his head. I'm sorry it's so frustrating!
This 100%. Sometimes men just don't pick up on these things. It also might not have occurred to your DH that it will be a lot more difficult to go out for a meal once the baby is born. Good luck!
Thank you very much for your advice.
I think I will try to talk to him, DH and I rarely fight or argue we usually have quite calm conversations but I just feel in the end like maybe I am being silly or overreacting.
As far as the driving goes, I agree that it's his responcibility especially if it was his idea to only have one vehile (it's standard and I don't know how to drive it). But he always makes such a fuss like it's a huge chore, I help pay for gas too so I really don't get it. It's embarassing for me too because when people ask me to go somewhere and I tell them I will have to bus because DH doesn't feel like driving me they think he's an ass!
Honestly it's not even about splurging I would be happy to go anywhere even just for coffee!
Ok, I'm frugal to the max (DH hates it) but even I am willing to get dressed up and go out for a nice dinner once in a while - it's not like you're doing it every night! And we have to have a chance to feel pretty, especially if we're stuck in the house all day.
I agree with all the PPs. Good luck!