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Babies: 3 - 6 Months
The effects of sleep deprivation
I have hit the sleep deprivation wall. I knew my baby would wake in the night and I'd like to think I was prepared for it, but I had no idea he would be such a terrible sleeper and that I would be living in a state of chronic sleep deprivation for 5 months now. I feel like I have read everything, tried everything, then read everything and tried everything again but nothing helps for more than a day or two. I know my performance at work is suffering, my relationship with my husband is definitely suffering, and being so exhausted all the time is taking some of the joy away from parenting. I am starting to feel depressed and alone. It feels like no one else is going through this and there's no one who can help. We've been to the pedi, there is no medical reason for his excessive waking, and the dr said we're doing everything right to encourage him to sleep longer stretches.
Please tell me I'm not alone.
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Re: The effects of sleep deprivation
Can you tell me more about how he's sleeping?
Is he taking naps? How long are they? When are they?
How long is he up before going down for a nap?
What time does he seem to want to "start the day"?
How often is he waking at night? Are they at consistent times? Does he eat a bottle at each wake up, and is it eaten completely or just snacked on?
Seconding the suggestion to get a friend/family member/etc. come by and take over for one night -- I know you don't think it'll make a difference, but even one night of sleep is going to help you SO MUCH. My husband and I share shifts so that we can each get at least 4-5 hours of uninterrupted sleep a night. Makes a HUGE difference.
You're not alone, I'm suffering with you. I've started to feel depresses and even angry when DS wakes up. I'm so tired and have a headache each day, last night I brought ds to the bed with me for the first time b/c i couldn't;t handle it anymore and at least i didn't have to get out of bed when he cried, i just rolled over and popped out the boob and he nursed. This has been happening for about 2 or 3 weeks now.
He's not napping well anymore, he"ll wake out of his nap after 15-40 minutes, he used to sleep for 2-3 hours at a time, he wants to be held all the time, his cheeks are like red roses, lots of drool, fingers are crammed in his mouth, so I'm chalking it up to teething even though I don't see anything yet.
I just have my husband try to get up a couple times and try to comfort him before the screaming gets too bad, then when it does i just get up and nurse him because that's the only thing that will calm him down. We've tried Tylenol before bed and during the night and it doesn't seem to make a difference. His demeanor is just fine and happy otherwise during the day and he loves to play and kick.
I need help too!
He takes 3 naps a day, on a good day. Anywhere from 30 - 90 minutes in the morning, 30 - 90 minutes in the afternoon and usually a 30 minute catnap around dinner time. I try not to have him up for more than 2 hours between naps. His bedtime is between 7 and 7:30 and he wants to start the day anywhere between 6 and 7 am. He wakes at night, oh gosh, sometimes 4 times, sometimes 6, sometimes more. I try not to feed him if it's been less than 3 hours since he last ate so he won't get in the habit of snacking all night. When he does eat, I offer him both breasts and he usually takes them and seems satisfied.
Every day I think "today is the day I'm going to have DH give him formula at night so I can sleep" but I never do. I'm pumping at work to give him enough breastmilk to eat at the sitter's, and I don't think I could pump enough for him to have bottles at night too.