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I'm scared of labor & delivery

SadietooSadietoo
in 3rd Trimester
As the day approaches, I'm feeling more and more terrified of delivering this baby. I had a crazy experience with my first (preemie, emergency c-section, NICU...etc) and a wonderful easy/quick labor and delivery (full term) with our second...so now I can't help but wonder how I can ever be lucky again ...2 times in a row? I am terrified of tearing (didn't with DS2 but he was only 7lbs4 and a small head) but my first was almost 5 lbs at 32 weeks with a huge head so I'm worried this one has a huge head as well. I also worry this one is not healthy since my first 2 are perfect...I worry about complications, what if I bleed to death, get an infection...etc. I know I'm being totally irrational but I'm just really scared. I worry about my other two little boys missing me while I'm in the hospital, especially my youngest, since he might not understand what is going on ...oh goodness I could go on and on. Sorry for the huge vent, I haven't told anyone this and it actually feels really good to let it out.
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Re: I'm scared of labor & delivery

  • HyfagalHyfagal member
    I don't find your fears to be irrational. I think the worst case scenarios go through everyone's mind at least once before the big day and then frequently on the big day. I know childbirth is natural and all but it's still a major event and alot of things can go wrong. It's okay to be scared.
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  • SarahTx5701SarahTx5701 member

    I'm scared too. my first was an induction at 35 weeks for severe pre-e and it was long and awful. I was hooked up to everything, I was so sick, I don't remember much. I never saw ds until 3 days later.

    I'm terrified of that happening again.

    However, I am also afraid that since I had a small baby the first time and never tore or had any real sore vagina issues, that I will have horrible tearing with this one and all of the above.

    I'm freaked out about PP stuff so badly too!

    L&D is super scary!  I remember after I had ds I was like whoa...that wasn't bad at all! HA!  But I'm scared about having a full term baby. I feel like it'll be totally different!

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  • MrsYamMrsYam member

    I'm scared too. I have a schedule c-section due to the baby being breech. My first was awesome. I had a "textbook" L&D and she was born within 12 hours of going into labor.

    It'll be a different experience this time with actual surgery, but I trust my doctors and I put my life and my baby's life in their hands. 


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  • afitz08afitz08
    Ive been pretty scared lately too, this is my first and I have no idea what to expect. I have alot of fears. At the same time im sooo ready to get her out and not be pregnant anymore though! I did have the craziest dream last night though, I gave birth to a lamp, that was the craziest dream ever! I woke up like WTH
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  • CutieBean79CutieBean79 member
    I'm scared too, but I have ignorance on my side.  lol.  I think it's totally normal to worry about the worst case scenarios, but I'm sure you will reach the other side with a beautiful baby in your arms.  Look how many healthy babies the Duggars had.  Big Smile
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  • TiffanyTheMomTiffanyTheMom member


    Well, you said you're scared of a repeat scenario, but here's one logical way to look at it: Your first baby was a preemie, and you're 39 wks right now. You will not be having a preemie even if you deliver tonight. And, if you're scared of another emergency c/s, ask your OB for an elective c/s. Then you know it's coming and planned and it won't be some scary last minute thing. Then, if you are having a lot of bleeding, you're already on the table and can be repaired right there. Maybe this would be best for your peace of mind. 

     

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  • EmberTopazEmberTopaz
    imageSarahTx5701:

    I'm scared too. my first was an induction at 35 weeks for severe pre-e and it was long and awful. I was hooked up to everything, I was so sick, I don't remember much. I never saw ds until 3 days later.

    I'm terrified of that happening again.

    However, I am also afraid that since I had a small baby the first time and never tore or had any real sore vagina issues, that I will have horrible tearing with this one and all of the above.

    I'm freaked out about PP stuff so badly too!

    L&D is super scary!  I remember after I had ds I was like whoa...that wasn't bad at all! HA!  But I'm scared about having a full term baby. I feel like it'll be totally different!

    SAME HERE!  My son came at what the hospital listed at 32wks (I counted a day short of 34wks) and he was 4 lbs 11 ozs.  I had lacerations with him and had to get six stitches, so I'm like if I stretched with him- will I tear with a full term baby?? That's my biggest/only fear right about now, not the contractions, pain, etc...but the threat of tearing or an episiotomy!!!

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  • lilbit923lilbit923 member

    Can I say you aren't alone? You truly aren't. Any mom is worried for the safety and well being of her LO and will endure whatever is necessary to ensure the baby is ok.

    When I had my son I had early labor at 32 and 35 weeks. My OB told me if I could make it to 37 weeks they'd induce. When we did the induction everything went wrong. He was transverse and had been that way since my 35 week labor scare. I would not dilate due to scarred cervix, they broke my water, did the cervadil, gave pitocin and nothing. I went for the c-section and they had to use forceps to get his head, that was wedged, out of my hip. He cried and then started dying. He was rushed to the NICU and the next day had to be sent to Texas Children's. He stayed there for 3 weeks and when he was 10 days old I got to hold him. It turned out his lungs weren't ready despite all the steroid shots I'd had. His blood had no oxygen and that's why he was dying at birth. Surfactant was given and he lived. He's 9 now.

    When I had my daughter I was terrified the same fate would be for my little girl as well....difficult delivery, dying child and a NICU stay. I had the exact opposite. I was a complete wreck over worrying for her, blaming myself for being in labor at 36 weeks and she was born via c-section perfectly healthy. Not a thing wrong with her and the NICU wasn't needed. She was super tiny (by our family standards), really fiesty and other than getting cold off and on...she was fine. She's 1 now.

    I have no idea what to expect for this delivery. I've had both ends of the spectrum and I'm worried for my baby and for myself. I have faith that everything will turn out fine. I'm excited to go through this baby's birth story as it is something to tell them about when they're old enough to ask about it. I am scared, excited, nervous, anxious, and elated. I can't wait.

    I think your fears are totally normal. Every Mom feels the way you do at some point in their pregnancy.

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