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Attending a Wedding in 9th month

AubreyBotskoAubreyBotsko
in 3rd Trimester

So, my boyfriend and I are due February 23rd. He is in one of his best friend's weddings on January 22nd. Our friends and families are a bunch of party animals. Needless to say, there will be an after party and everyone will be staying over at the hotel. The wedding is being held about 45 minutes from our home. Since this is our first baby and it is so late in my pregnancy, I don't feel comfortable with my boyfriend getting drunk - just in case something were to happen. I don't mind if he has some drinks and maybe gets a little buzz on (Lord knows I would if I could at this point), but I don't want him to get to a point that he wouldn't be able to leap into action if something were to happen. Additionally, I don't think we should be spending more money on the wedding sleeping at a hotel when home is just 45 minutes away. 

I am not sure if this makes me a tyrant, but some of his fam and friends think that he should be able to "party" and get loaded and stay up to the wee small hours with everyone while I have to sleep in a hotel room by myself. They have kind of inferred that I am being selfish or overly paranoid about it, which I secretly find offensive.

Just not sure how to feel about it. Don't know if it is anxiety of d-day coming up or hormones or what, but it is something I feel strongly about. The boyfriend agrees with me, but once his fam and friends start to pressure him, I am afraid he may crumble.

 I suppose I am looking for some advice on this. . . please : )

Sorry for the rant. 

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Re: Attending a Wedding in 9th month

  • buboobuboo
    Your boyfriend should be able to have some drinks with his friends during the reception but I think you all should drive home after. No need for him to stay up late partying while he has a very pg girlfriend.
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  • ~adamwife~~adamwife~ member

    I think you sound completely realistic and your expectations are normal.  It seems silly to me for a grown man, who is expecting his child any day, to act like a college student and get so drunk that he needs to stay at a hotel.  You guys can still have plenty of fun at the wedding by attending and driving back home.  He can have a few drinks and you can drive.

    If family and friends say anything I would tell them to grow up.

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  • stephanie_shoestephanie_shoe member

    I agree that he should be able to let loose at the reception, and then absolutely go home with you.  One of my best friends went through this one night-- we had friends visiting from out of town one weekend when she was 2 weeks away from her due date.  Her husband got LOADED so I stayed the night in case she went into labor so she would have a ride to the hospital.

    Is it possible for you to carpool to the wedding with another couple planning on going home also?  I was thinking that your hubby could stay with his family for the after party,  while you get to go home with a carpool and sleep in your own bed.

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  • smarrellsmarrell
    You don't mention what your boyfriend thinks.  It's a perfectly reasonable request on your part.  I wouldn't care what the friends and family say...this should be a decision that the two of you make together.
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  • AubreyBotskoAubreyBotsko
    My boyfriend agrees with me but has a problem saying no or standing up to his friends and family. I have no problem driving him home (as long as he is not fall down drunk). My main goal is to not get home later than 1 am, sleep in my own bed, not spend money on a hotel room and make sure that if something were to happen that he would be clear headed enough to get it together and go. Other than that I look forward to having a good time . . . hell, a pregnant woman + a buffet + a formal event where I will be the only one not wearing spanx or sucking it in all night = happiness. 
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  • daenikoffredaenikoffre member
    image~adamwife~:

    I think you sound completely realistic and your expectations are normal.  It seems silly to me for a grown man, who is expecting his child any day, to act like a college student and get so drunk that he needs to stay at a hotel.  You guys can still have plenty of fun at the wedding by attending and driving back home.  He can have a few drinks and you can drive.

    If family and friends say anything I would tell them to grow up.

    This, exactly. 

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  • kcisthebombdotcomkcisthebombdotcom member
    image~adamwife~:

    I think you sound completely realistic and your expectations are normal.  It seems silly to me for a grown man, who is expecting his child any day, to act like a college student and get so drunk that he needs to stay at a hotel.  You guys can still have plenty of fun at the wedding by attending and driving back home.  He can have a few drinks and you can drive.

    If family and friends say anything I would tell them to grow up.

    I agree 100% with this.

    I also find it odd that his family/friends would be pressuring him to get completely drunk. What are they, 20?

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  • drpaynedrpayne member
    imageKC_13:
    image~adamwife~:

    I think you sound completely realistic and your expectations are normal.  It seems silly to me for a grown man, who is expecting his child any day, to act like a college student and get so drunk that he needs to stay at a hotel.  You guys can still have plenty of fun at the wedding by attending and driving back home.  He can have a few drinks and you can drive.

    If family and friends say anything I would tell them to grow up.

    I agree 100% with this.

    I also find it odd that his family/friends would be pressuring him to get completely drunk. What are they, 20?

     

    This is what I thought.  I think you're being reasonable.

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  • IncogNeatoIncogNeato member

    My DH and I agreed on a two drink max for him after 35 weeks so that he would be prepared if I went into labor... which I did at 36 weeks.

    Partying can be fun but really, how old is he? This is just the first of many times that he will need to be mature and responsible. Getting smashed doesn't happen much when you're responsible for a baby.

     

    What does your DH think? Shouldn't you be deciding together? Besides, you may feel like crap by then and want to make it a short night and sleep in your own bed and your H should be ok with that

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