Blended Families

BM's Dad/SD's Grandpa Died

So BM's Dad/SD's Grandpa died today in a freak accident.  We are 3000 miles away so we can't do too much to help out.  What should we do?  Any suggestions?  I feel like sending a sympathy card is not enough and sending a plant/flowers seems weird.  SD doesn't know yet.  She was really close to her Grandpa.  I wish DH and I could do something to help, but we have no idea what. 

Re: BM's Dad/SD's Grandpa Died

  • When BM's mom died, we sent flowers because she loved them and was an avid gardener. DH even remembered which flowers she didn't like so that when we placed the order we were sure to tell them none of those!

    I would definitely say call SD often during this time. If your DH has any pleasant memories/funny stories of her grandpa, have him share them with SD. If flowers seems weird maybe make a donation in his name to a cause that was important to him or to his church?

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  • Or send her a picture if DH has one of her and her grandpa? 

    Stories/memories (per pp) are always great! 

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  • Sadly our family just went through something similar. My brother has a daughter and is no longer with her mother. There has been many conflicts and ill feelings between our families during their relationship and even more once they broke up. But in the last couple years he has gotten close to BM's mother(my nieces grandma). She sadly passed away a couple days before Christmas.

    My niece is 6, not sure how old your SD is. My niece was very very close with her grandmother. My brother and my mom went to the wake and funeral & sent a large flower arrangment. My brother also gave up some of his time on Christmas for her to spend extra time with BM's family. And then took her during the week when BM needed some time to make arrangments for the funeral.

    Being so far away you obviously can't be there to help support, but I would send flowers/card. They also got my niece a beautiful locket with a picture of her grandma and her inside.

  • These are great ideas!  Thanks so much ladies!  

    SD is 8.  She found out this morning.  She cried a little, but she is acting strong now (possibly has not set in yet).  BM is a wreck.  DH has talked to BM yesterday and today, just to listen to her and be there for her.  He also talked to DS this morning.

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