Anyone not completely follow dr.'s advice about waiting?

704bride · December 2010

I had a natural miscarriage at 5w4d (spotting started at 5w1d) and my doctor wanted me to wait a cycle. For many reasons (besides just wanting to be pregnant), I really don't want to wait. Everything returned to normal like clockwork. It looks like I'm ovulating today - the day I normally would in a cycle, if you count the first day of my miscarriage as day 1 of my cycle (when I really started bleeding, not spotting). One of the things my doctor told me is if I wasn't watching my cycles closely, I never would've known I was pregnant. So, if that were truly the case and never knew, what would have kept me from trying this month? I really wanted to follow her advice and not be a bad patient, but I'm not sure that I can. Also, we had sex 3 days ago, when I didn't think I'd be ovulating on schedule. It was the next day when I realized things seemed to be right on schedule. So...I think since there's a chance of getting pregnant from that time, that's making me think, "Why not actually try?" What were you told? What did you do? What do you think you'd do in my situation?

AutumnLeavesFall · December 2010

I followed my doctors orders.

They have a medical degree, I don't. I pay them to help me.

Kevswife05 · December 2010

I'd listen to your doctor and give your body a chance to heal. Mine told me to wait three months, we waited a little longer for personal reasons but I was glad I gave myself and body a break. If something had happened during those months we decided to try when we were told not to, I would never have forgiven myself.

vflipo · December 2010

I followed my doctor's orders. It wasn't that hard to wait one cycle... twice...

magdalina.h · December 2010

My dr told us to wait 6 months because of my c/s. After 4 months she told me that we could start trying then. If she hadn't said it was okay, I would have waited. She knows more about pregnancy than I do and she went to medical school. Yes you could ignore your dr, but it's usually best to follow his/her recommendation.

krissymac · December 2010

Followed doctor's suggestion of waiting one cycle. I'm glad I had a LMP and ovulation date to go off of. I hear you about not wanting to wait, but it's really not that long.

BabyTrippin · December 2010

I was instructed to wait 3 months post m/c and d&c. Did I enjoy using condoms for 3 months? Not in the least, but I did what my doctor thought was best for me and my body.

If you think you can live with the guilt that *will* come if you don't follow doctor's instructions and have another m/c, go right ahead and ignore the person you pay to give you medical advice.

And, even if their ONLY reason is "it is for dating purposes" that is still a very valid reason. Sure, an u/s can date a pregnancy. What if that pregnancy is already a week behind at the time of the dating u/s?

In the end, it is your choice. Just be sure it is one you can live with no matter the outcome.

ETA: ::waving from TTCAL:: I forgot where I was when I posted LOL! Sorry for butting in Stick out tongue

Ernie52408 · December 2010

Say you did ignore your doctor's advice and got pregnant again this cycle. And then- God forbid- something happened to the pregnancy. You would forever have to question if the loss was your fault. Could you live with that?

Just wait one cycle. If your doctor wants you to wait I'm sure there is a reason. Your body needs to heal. Miscarriage is very traumatic physically and emotionally.

x0stephanie · December 2010

My miscarriage was also at 5w4d. I didnt have a d&c. We conceived about 2 weeks later and I had a positive test 4 weeks later. I was told to wait until the bleeding stopped before having sex again. I'm a little fuzzy on exactly what my dr and midwife told me, but my dr told me to wait at least a month but that it wouldnt be the end of the world if we got pregnant before that. The midwife told me there was no evidence that waiting a few cycles was necessary and again that there was no solid evidence that conceiving right away would be any worse than if we had waited.

My pregnancy has been exactly the same as if we had waited, the only difference is I've had 2 dating ultrasounds done (the first one was done too early). In the end, it's a personal decision since your dr can't dictate what goes on in your bedroom.

shanna82 · December 2010

AutumnLeavesFall:
I followed my doctors orders.
They have a medical degree, I don't. I pay them to help me.

This! Doctors know best. As for the 3 days ago BDing...sounds like you weren't planning on following Dr's orders anyway, so why ask now? Condoms are your friend when TTA...would you be able to forgive yourself if you did get pg again and God forbid, lost that baby too? I wouldn't.

704bride · December 2010

You guys are all right and are saying exactly what I was telling myself after I was so upset after talking to my doctor. It's kind of like the little angel on one shoulder and the little devil on the other. It's just gotten so tempting since everything returned to normal so quickly. For what it's worth, I had another miscarriage a few months ago and had a D&C, waited the cycle I was supposed to, then got pregnant (second cycle after waiting one) and had another miscarriage. So, who knows what would've happened if I hadn't waited and got pregnant the first cycle. I think part of me thinks I'm going to have another miscarriage, so I might as well get it over with sooner rather than later. I know, crazy thinking.

704bride · December 2010

shanna82:
AutumnLeavesFall:
I followed my doctors orders.
They have a medical degree, I don't. I pay them to help me.
This! Doctors know best. As for the 3 days ago BDing...sounds like you weren't planning on following Dr's orders anyway, so why ask now? Condoms are your friend when TTA...would you be able to forgive yourself if you did get pg again and God forbid, lost that baby too? I wouldn't.

Out of all the things my doctor said, none of them included that my pregnancy would be at a higher risk than if I had waited the cycle. She was more concerned about dating the pregnancy (I chart, so I know when I ovulate - so that part isn't really an issue) and if I were to have bleeding at the start of my pregnancy, we would wonder...is it the pregnancy, is it my period, or is it leftover from the miscarriage? I think it would just cause possibly unnecessary worry. I spotted with my son, too, though, so for all I know, I'll have spotting again no matter when I get pregnant again.

magdalina.h · December 2010

Snork:
shanna82:
AutumnLeavesFall:
I followed my doctors orders.
They have a medical degree, I don't. I pay them to help me.
This! Doctors know best. As for the 3 days ago BDing...sounds like you weren't planning on following Dr's orders anyway, so why ask now? Condoms are your friend when TTA...would you be able to forgive yourself if you did get pg again and God forbid, lost that baby too? I wouldn't.
Out of all the things my doctor said, none of them included that my pregnancy would be at a higher risk than if I had waited the cycle. She was more concerned about dating the pregnancy (I chart, so I know when I ovulate - so that part isn't really an issue) and if I were to have bleeding at the start of my pregnancy, we would wonder...is it the pregnancy, is it my period, or is it leftover from the miscarriage? I think it would just cause possibly unnecessary worry. I spotted with my son, too, though, so for all I know, I'll have spotting again no matter when I get pregnant again.

It's very common to not ovulate the cycle after a m/c or even a late loss.

TheGregory's07 · December 2010

AutumnLeavesFall:
I followed my doctors orders.
They have a medical degree, I don't. I pay them to help me.

This.

Jordan1234 · December 2010

My doctor said there was no reason for me to wait, and I didn't. I got pregnant three weeks after my miscarriage. I knew when I ovulated, and I was right on with my estimate of dating. Things seem to be progressing normally, and my doctor assured me that in my particular situation, I wouldn't be at any higher risk of another m/c just because I didn't wait a cycle. In the end, it is your decision.

missdelica · December 2010

Generally doctor want you to wait a cycle or two (maybe longer depending on the situation) for dating perposes, and to make sure that everything gets expelled after the m/c. With some women not everything gets expelled out of the uterus and can cause infection or result in a d & c. I got pregnant right after a m/c but my doctor told me that everything was checking out fine and there was no reason for me to think that if I had another M/c that it would be my fault. I found this website post interesting. BUT I am NOT saying that you should listen to this. Your best option is to discuss this with your doctor and try and follow their advice. I just found this interesting. Good luck

https://www.babycenter.com/204_women-can-safely-get-pregnant-right-after-miscarriage-study_10336481.bc

and also

https://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_m0CYD/is_22_36/ai_94158757/

alliejoe · December 2010

Your doctor said to wait a cycle and it's hard. I think we've all been in there

I think the comments the other ladies have made about being able to deal with the guilt/feelings if you do conceive again before you're "allowed" is very valid. My cycles were, I thought, regular but low and behold I O'd early (I thought we were BDing 10ish day before O and it was actually 6...) and got pregnant the cycle before I was give the go ahead. I worried more than I can even begin to tell you. I felt so much guilt constantly.

Good luck

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