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luvlieK
member
Hospital Tour :o(
luvlieK
member
So we had our hospital tour tonight. (Different hospital than we used with C). Ugh now I am even more nervous. Some of the differences I am worried about:
- If he is early they will probably take him out of the room right away to check him out. (With C we had a neonatologist? check him out bedside). This had already freaked me out because I didn't get hold or even see C right away. If they take him out of the room right away I will be extremely upset. (I am not talking about life threatening, etc. Just the "normal" check because he was early).
- Next, after an hour the baby and the father leave for an hour to stay in the nursery. C was with me the entire time (if I wanted) at the other hospital. This seems a bit heartbreaking too. They also take them each morning for awhile.
- Guests are limited in amount and hours at this hospital. Which, quite frankly, I would rather have everyone in at once and then leave... But no they will have to come in shifts. I can deal with this, but its just another difference.
- They have mandatory? parenting classes each morning. Umm yea, just what I will be in the mood for!
There were other random things that bothered me, like decor and whatever lol But these were the major things.
47 months &
11 months
11 months
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Hospital Tour :o(
I'd be upset too
Our hospital took the baby every morning so the pedis could see them all in the nursery. The 2nd morning they came and got him at 6am and I didn't see him again until after 10!!! I was p*ssed. Apparently the pedi got delayed and they kept all the babies instead of bringing them back and getting them again later. Knowing what I know now I would have demanded he be brought back.
Ugh.
Last time the pedis just visited each room.
Boo on late pedis!
11 months
Yup. This.
Honestly, reading this whole post made my stomach turn. I'd be the crazy-crazy lady who birthed at home unassisted rather than deal with that.
Was C early? Is there a particular reason you think/know/feel that #2 will be early?
<a href="http://s1103.photobucket.com/albums/g471/HealthfulMama/?action=view
barring life threatening emergencies, you can pretty much refuse anything. You don't want the baby taken from the room, they can't force you. Obviously, there are some things that will need to be done out of the room (hearing test for one), but you can refuse the random "we're going to hold your baby hostage in the nursery for an hour a day" if you want to.
Personally, with that many policies I disagreed with, I'd be looking for a different hospital.
Baring a life threatening emergency .
I dare someone to try to take my baby away after an hour.
I agree completely with Go4. Just reading your post made my pulse quicken. I can't imagine how you are feeling. I would find another hospital, even if it meant switching practices. That is too much to fight them on.
My hospital has Kangaroo Care now and moves the whole family together after 90 minutes of Kangaroo Care after birth. The NICU staff also does their thing bedside if need be. With that being said, they used to also just let you have the baby for about an hour after birth than dad and baby go to nursery together, while you're taken to your room. I'm so glad they no longer do this and it was a great relief that we got to all be together at all times with this last birth.
I would just refuse to have my baby taken from me. I don't think they can force you to send your baby to the nursery. You can pretty much refuse anything if it's not life threatening.
:stomach turning too!:
I agree with everyone. It's not just about bonding--the best thing for your baby, even if early, is to go right on the breast. And really, to eat about every hour, but certainly at will. I know you're planning to bf. There is no reason, unless life-threatening, that your baby ever needs to leave your side once he's born. These kind of archaic, dare-I-say bad practices are not in your best interest, luvlie!! I mean, if this is after birth, what interventions do they push during labor and birth?
This hospital sounds like a nightmare. Is it the only one your OB practice has rights at? If so, that's a red flag. It's early enough to change if you have to.
Was there even rooming in?
If you do stay with the hospital, get your OB and your DH ready to be take-no-prisoners advocates of your birth plan (which should absolutely include no nursery, immediate breastfeeding, etc.). The first few hours are vital for establishing your entire nursing relationship.
oh luvlie, my heart hurts for you if this is your only hospital choice.
i wouldn't allow those things. Noah was not allowed to leave my room at all unless accompanied by me or Joe, and i would not bend. i was the crazy mom accompanying them to the hearing test. it's your child, you shouldn't have to let him be taken away just randomly.
:-( i hope you find a solution that works for you.
wrong, wrong, wrong!
Is this at FMH? I think my mom still has a friend in L/D there, she could do some fishing around for you to see how strict they are with these silly policies, if desired.
I'd get your H or a doula armed with some legal info, prepared to fight to keep baby with you unless there are immediate health concerns, in which case, I'd ask to have your H accompany baby as much as possible.
I also had them take M away from me one morning for the pedi to check-up, and they kept him for 3 1/2 hours. Even after I repeatedly asked for him back, it was almost 45 min longer. We were really struggling at BFing, and he was kinda low Birthweight and had odd blood sugar things going on. I swear they were trying to give him bottles without my knowledge.
This. My child NEVER left my side once. They even did the hearing test in our room, along with all other testing and pedi visits. That was the routine for my hospital and that's why I chose it and then selected a midwife that would deliver there. Maybe you need to switch if you're so uncomfortable with the hospital. It doesn't sound like you are at the right one for your needs.
He was 36 weeks 1 day, which they consider a preemie (technically) and had the specialist there to check him out in the room right away. I seriously got to see him for 1 second before and I don't even think I got to touch him. He was checked out for a while (in our room) before I ever got to hold him.
I still tell dh how mad I am because I was asking him about him and he wasn't answering. (He was also blocking my view). Probably in Daddy bliss. But it was really hard for me and I fear this could be even worse.
I knew C was going to be early. It was weird. I always knew he would be born right around that day. When my sister scheduled my baby shower I told her it was too late and it was. For this baby I keep having vivid dreams that he will be born on Feb 10, which would only be 35 something weeks. So we will see.
11 months
The problem is, last time none of my wishes were respected (at the other hospital). After the baby was born was fine, but L&D was hard.
I also am too afraid to pick a birth center, in case he is early. I feel like I would want to be in a hospital, jic of anything. In that case I wouldn't want to get my hopes up of delivering at the birth center
(
11 months
if you can afford it, hire a doula. She'll stand up for your wishes, and then you can decide which hospital you prefer. But the patient's bill of rights (which the hospital has NO CHOICE in whether they follow it or not!) says you can decline ANY service. This can be overridden in a life threatening situation, but that is the only time, unless they can manage to declare you incompetent of making decisions.
Yea, I know but it was everything. Like she knew I wanted no one but dh in the room and she went and got my Mom. I had to then not let my Mom in when she was at the door to my room. She kept badgering me to get an epidural. The list goes on and on. Ugh.
I will have to look into it.
11 months
If I were in your shoes, and this hospital was my only choice, I would be the crazy lady who declined/refused much of what you said regarding baby care. The baby (barring life threatening things) can be checked in your room. And they can't force you to send your baby to the nursery. Actually, were I to birth in a hospital, my baby would never go anywhere without DH or I.
I hope you can find solutions to all of this so you have a wonderful labor and delivery experience!
I'll throw another ditto in there for what mrsgo4 said. They absolutely can not take your baby away from you unless it's a life threatening emergency if you don't say so. Just keep in mind that you won't be making any friends and you're likely to get a lot of attitude from the staff for the duration of your stay. This might not be a big deal for you but I thought I'd warn you. Just because we asked to give Ariel her first bath and to delay it and were pretty strict about rooming in I had one night time nurse that badgered the sh*t out of me and made me feel like the super uptight mom and tried to scare tactic me into letting Ariel room in the nursery (because, you know, she was going to die while I was sleeping if there was no one there to stare at her the whole time - nya nya to her, I just slept with her on my chest instead!)
I've talked about it before but we had this exact scenario with Noel because our hospitals policies were the same for gbs positive deliveries (even with proper antibiotic treatment). I was a first time mom and didn't know what I know now and honestly it was extremely hard for me. They took him maybe an hour and a half after he was born (not nearly long enough and he'd hardly had any chance to try to bf) then I tried to take a nap in the room while he was gone for the hour. I woke up almost 4 hours later to no baby in a panic. When I paged them wigging out that something had happened that caused them to keep him, they were like "oh, you wanted him back?" Ummmmm. Every time they took him for any little thing (hearing test, weight check) he'd be gone for nearly 2 hours. I'm 100% positive that this had a lot to do with the struggles we had bf for the first couple of months.
Ariel on the other hand, I was much more diligent about and she nursed like a champ and my supply was just fine.
If I were you and switching hospitals isn't an option (it wouldn't have been with me at this point) I would think about hiring a doula but more than anything I would just tell them point blank that they were not going to take your baby away after the birth. Period, the end.
And (((hugs)))
Wow, I'm actually surprised at a lot of these policies because more hospitals are moving towards rooming in/baby never leaving mom's side, etc. I would be the most concerned about the baby having to be in the nursery an hour after delivery. Um, what if he is nursing at that time??
I also didn't get to hold DS for about 20 minutes after he was born - the NICU staff was in my room for his birth because of the meconium in my fluid. They also didn't want me nursing him for another hour - something I know better about now. But I really hated that he was taken from me (even just across the room) right away.
This time we are having the birth at a birth center. I won't have interventions pushed on me, and they don't take the baby away from you ever. They only get weight and height once you get up to go to the bathroom and DH holds the baby. There's no rush for any of that stuff and if baby needs extra help, it is all done on your chest - which is best for baby anyway (skin to skin).
I know you're worried about a birth center, but I would look into it anyway and also look into hiring a doula if you end up at the hospital if you deliver before 37 weeks.
Honestly, luvlie, I would hire a doula and go back to this hospital. The doula can fight your battles for you when you are in labor, but you are on your own in the pp unit. Both sides of this coin are important, and I think the number of battles you will have to fight based on what you are describing would be too many to deal with right after delivery.