Not the best Christmas
As many of us have brought up on this board, Christmas is a rough time when you are waiting. I tried really hard to keep my depression at bay and I was doing really well....and then had an AWFUL Christmas.
I went down to my sister's place a few days before Christmas to spend time with her family and my parents and then my husband and the dogs were going to meet me down there on Christmas Eve. My sister had been sick with "the flu" a few weeks earlier and was still run down. She kept getting nauseous and would go to bed early. I had several conversations with my sister and her husband asking if it was possible that she was pregnant. No, no, they kept saying. They have two kids and do not want more, but they are Catholic so are not supposed to protect themselves against it. Anyway, she went to bed early Christmas Eve because she was sick again and I continued to wonder if she was pregnant. When my husband and I went to bed I talked to him about it and he finally admitted that he and everyone else knew that she was pregnant but they planned on hiding it from me until after Christmas. I was horrified. I know that their intention was good, but it was such a horrible way to find out. I felt like such a fool, reliving all of the conversations that I had leading up to Christmas. It felt like such a betrayal. The next morning I was still upset and did not talk to my sister beause I felt like I at least deserved an apology, which I only got from my husband. She said I was being childish and now we're not talking.
Hope everyone else had a better Christmas. I really hope that 2011 is the year for all of us on the board that are waiting.
Re: Not the best Christmas
Something similar happened to me years ago except the holiday was Thanksgiving and it was my much younger niece who was pregnant after getting married in August at 17. We were going through fertitlity treatments that weren't going anywhere. When I heard the news I obviously got upset. One of my sisters had the nerve to tell me not to cry...that I didn't have the right to be upset and I should be happy for them. It makes the hurt so much worse when you know the expectant parent isn't really in a postion to have a child (for whatever reason) and then everyone treats you likeyou are some kind of unresonable mental patient be cause you have feelings about the situation.
I'll be praying that you and you sister can resolve your feelings and that your baby comes to you soon!
PAL/PGAL Welcome
I'm so sorry! I would have been horrified and beyond mad. I think how they all handled it was just cruel! I appreciate honesty, much more than being made to feel like an idiot. If they'd told you in the weeks leading up to Christmas then at least you'd have had time to start adjusting!
If they had wanted to keep it a secret to "spare you" then they should have not told anyone until after the holidays! Ugh! A huge hug to you and I hope 2011 is a wonderful year for you!
Thank you!! I am actually, mysteriously, not depressed about the pregnancy. I usually fall into a depression every time I hear that someone close to me is pregnant. I hate it because, of course, I should be happy (and I am happy for them). Anyway, I did not get depressed, so maybe it was some brilliant plan all along: make me angry at them so I would not get depressed.
Happy holidays every one!
That's a pretty crappy way to find out and I've been told in some pretty crappy ways!
I'm also quite taken aback that she thinks YOUR the one being childish?! Wow, it sounds more like she's just very guilty. I would be waiting for an apology before I could let it go.
:-( I'm sorry you had a bad Christmas!
I feel your pain! I don't understand why people think it's a good idea to keep things like that a secret. I had 2 similar things happen to me. I'd much rather just know the truth instead of being lied to. Sorry you had such a crummy experience.