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ugh, I hate this night

vera1127vera1127 member
in Single Parents
I feel like while everyone else is enjoying their families and LO's, my family is falling apart. H told me tonight that he thinks he has fallen out of love with me. Still refuses counseling, and will barely speak to me. I tried hanging out with him in the living room, but he's more involved in his text msg conversation with his friend to listen to me (I was trying to talk about oreo balls, like, for real...). I'm now in the bedroom watching Christmas movies alone. Merry effing Christmas to me.
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Re: ugh, I hate this night

  • muckyduck208muckyduck208 member
    I hated this night my first year single too. All the traditions I was trying to make and keep seem impossible since I was pg and a month single. I was overwhelmed by the thought of splitting holidays and all that jazz but tonight I feel great. Kids are in bed sleeping, presents are under the tree, stockings filled... I get to enjoy every smile tomorrow morning and I get the joy of knowing I made my children happy... And knowing my STBXH is at his parents telling them how much of a biotch I am for "withholding" the kids is the icing on the cake :) It will get easier once you know what is going on and where you stand (co-parenting, solo-parenting), and how the holiday will be split. Hold your head high.
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  • katwriter1969katwriter1969

    I spent the evening with a married couple and their baby. They are like my family. They don't ever make me feel like a fifth wheel but like a family member. It definitely made the holiday very sweet. We talked about doing something similar next year when my child arrives. I am excited to think about it.

    Don't let anyone steal your Christmas. Christmas is in your heart. I lost both of my parents years ago and used to have a really hard time coping this time of year. Now I focus on the happy memories I have of them and I focus on doing things that bring me joy, like going to Christmas light displays and seeing friends.

    You'll get through it! 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • vera1127vera1127 member

    Thanks girls. I did make it! I actually ended up having a good conversation with my daycare lady (of all people) and made some plans with friends for next week while DH is taking his "vacation" (quotations bc I'm thinking it will be a neverending vacation).

    @katwriter--you are not too far from me in baltimore. I only live about an hour away.

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  • dimakedimake

    Sorry :(  I remember last Christmas being difficult.  We had a blizzard, and XH picked DDs and me up at my parent's house and brought us back to our house -  but he was too tired to open gifts with the girls so he came back the next day.  After he left that night I chucked the Christmas tree, whole, into the basement.

    This year is much better.  I don't even notice XH's absence any more.  I promise you it gets so much better.

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