Going back to work next week & sad

hopeful34 · December 2010

I can't believe how fast 12wks went! My MIL will be watching the babies 4 days a week. I'm so thankful that a family member will be watching them but i can't help but think "what if they like her better than me"? Does anyone else feel this way? I know it's something i have to get over but i'm scared this might happen and they'll want to go to her for comfort and not me. It'll crush me. I can't afford to stay home so i don't have any choice. Crying

anyalee · December 2010

I HATED going back to work at 12 weeks! I'm only working 2 days though. The only good part is when I get home and they see me, they light up with huge smiles! They'd much rather be with my than my mom, who babysits. I wouldn't worry too much!

MADforever2009 · December 2010

I'm sorry. I just made the decision not to go back to work and I'm not sure we can afford it. You are very strong and your babies will love it when u get home!!!

ihendrix06 · December 2010

HI

I went back to work after 9wks and it was hard. My girls go to daycare and I wish I had family to watch them. It gets easier everyday. When they see me, they are happy to see me and that makes me feel better...Stay strong and you will do fine..

jamie217 · December 2010

Everyone told me this and it's true...the anticipation of going back is worse than actually going back. We have a sitter, MIL and my Dad watching them and I was worried that they would like them better, but they get so excited everyday when I come home and I feel like although it sucks at times leaving them in the morning, I appreciate my time with them more and no longer stress and get annoyed by little things anymore.

hopeful34 · December 2010

jamie217:
Everyone told me this and it's true...the anticipation of going back is worse than actually going back. We have a sitter, MIL and my Dad watching them and I was worried that they would like them better, but they get so excited everyday when I come home and I feel like although it sucks at times leaving them in the morning, I appreciate my time with them more and no longer stress and get annoyed by little things anymore.

im hoping this is the case....thanks so much everyone

monkski · December 2010

I agree that the anticipation was way worse. We have a nanny and I'm back working full time and they are just as happy with me when I am home and are so excited to see me when I get home. Sometimes it's actually been nice to go into work, especially after a really hard weekend of cranky babies.

OrangeSmoke · December 2010

anticipation was FAR worse than the actual act. I went back to work at 17 weeks and the boys went to DC. I did have a moment of "what if they like them better"... but seriously, every single day when dh and I show up to pick them up, it's HUGE smiles all over. And it's not just my kids, every kid there is the same.

They know - you are their mommy and no one will ever be able to take your place in their hearts.

Shannonlea · December 2010

I went back to work just before 12 weeks and my MIL watches my kids, too. I can tell you that over time, it gets easier. Its not easy, just easier. I have found its easier to let my husband drop them off. We also have a notebook that I can write her notes in (Emma was fussy last night with a new tooth, Josh hasn't pooped in a day, whatever)

And I can tell you that you are ALWAYS, ALWAYS their mama. If its between your MIL and you, they will come to you. Sure, there might be a time where your MIL consoles them but kids are great at knowing who their mama is, especially at that age.

Good luck, you'll do great!

Haven1 · December 2010

OrangeSmoke:
They know - you are their mommy and no one will ever be able to take your place in their hearts.

Sniff. As a mom sitting at her desk at work, I need to always hear this.

But yes, it's true. The anticipation is worse than the event. You know your babies are loved and well taken care of with your MIL. That's a huge relief.

For us daycare moms, I got the most comfort knowing they have each other all day. I was worried they'd think I'd left them forever, but I knew they wouldn't be scared since they were with their brother. (Gah, now I'm crying again!)

OrangeSmoke · December 2010

Haven1:

OrangeSmoke:
They know - you are their mommy and no one will ever be able to take your place in their hearts.
Sniff. As a mom sitting at her desk at work, I need to always hear this.
But yes, it's true. The anticipation is worse than the event. You know your babies are loved and well taken care of with your MIL. That's a huge relief.

For us daycare moms, I got the most comfort knowing they have each other all day. I was worried they'd think I'd left them forever, but I knew they wouldn't be scared since they were with their brother. (Gah, now I'm crying again!)

This is so true! My boys are now even assigned the same "primary caregiver" at DC. Last week, H went to dc without A for one day (A was sick) and H came home super stressed out that he didn't sleep much that night!

veronicacorningstone · December 2010

As others said, it gets easier. Eventually.

I only got 12 weeks FMLA, but I had to go back to work at 9 weeks, since I was on bedrest 3 weeks before they were born. I HATED it. Luckily, my mom comes to the house and watches the boys and my DH works from home, so at least he is in another room if she needs help.

I think the 3rd day at work it really hit me hard and I was so depressed. (Don't do like I did and go online and buy them things to compensate for not being there. $130 later and I still didn't feel better.)

I finally forced myself to take the glass half-full attitude. I told myself to be thankful I have and job and two babies when there are so many people who have neither.

Your babies love you and will know YOU. Don't worry about them loving you MIL more.

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