I let Will CIO today :(

redshoegirl · December 2010

Will has been doing this thing lately for his naps where he'll sleep for maybe - MAYBE - 30 min and then insist on being awake. He'll scream hysterically in his crib until I go and pick him up for playtime (he always has his paci, I pat his back, etc., but he simply refuses to go back to sleep).

And then he's still exhausted while playing (very fussy, eye rubbing, the works), but if I try to get him to nap he just starts crying again. Lately this has gotten even worse because he's started waking Dash up as well - which means I end up with TWO fussy, crying babies who desperately need to sleep but are refusing.

This afternoon it happened yet again - I let him cry for a few minutes to see if he'd settle down but it just kept escalating. And then Dash woke up and started crying, and eventually I took them downstairs for play time. 20 minutes of that and nothing was making them happy - they were still so tired that they cried no matter what toy or book or song I offered them. So I steeled myself and said, "This HAS to stop TODAY," brought them back upstairs and put them in their cribs.

Dash fussed a bit but was so tired that he went back to sleep after 5-10 minutes. Will? Cue the screaming. For the longest 25 minutes of my life, I think he and I were competing to see who could cry the hardest - him in his crib or me outside the nursery door. I wanted so much to go inside, but I knew from past experience that if he saw me, he'd temporarily get happy and then start screaming even harder when I left the room.

I don't want to have to do this every time...I really hope he'll realize how much better he feels with more sleep.

I feel like crap now. Sad

expatjen · December 2010

I don't have any words of wisdom or advice ... but I just wanted to say I feel your heartache! poor Will.

But, hopefully, he'll learn that sleep is important.

I haven't really let K CIO, but I have put him in his crib when he's been super fussy/cranky-pants and walked away for a few minutes - just to calm myself down. And after a minute or two - once I picked him back up, he'd settle down and at least stop his red-face, back-arching crying.

mrsmauimary · December 2010

Oh no! I'm sorry to hear this. It's so hard. Awfully hard with two. But I went through exactly the same thing with Ben between 8-9 months. I did CIO and as awful as it was, it worked. Keep on a schedule and a routine, that is so incredibly important. Some moms think I was a crazy sleep freak, and was really strict on when his naps/sleep was, but now with Ben's ability to fall asleep on his own and happy, it's something that I don't regret doing.

But I did find, that his meltdowns were either attributed to: teeth, a new milestone (learning to crawl/standing up) or even the need to drop a nap. That's it. If you can figure out one of these, you're golden. It takes a while of trial and error but once you've got it - it helps. What are their naps like? What time do they wake up in the morning, nap and when do they sleep for the night? I lived by the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" until he went to daycare at 12 months, and then we just took it from there.

I hope this helps. I really wish these guys came with a manual to figure out, but they don't. It gets easier, and then they throw a curve ball at ya, and then it gets easier again. Rinse and repeat.

MrsNJSwimmer · December 2010

I swear, it's like torture to listen to them cry, esp when it escalates!

I haven't done it b/c MH doesn't want to, and I feel like I'm punishing him for no good reason, so this is why he still will only nap on us and sleep with us.

MrsIH · December 2010

mrsmauimary:
Oh no! I'm sorry to hear this. It's so hard. Awfully hard with two. But I went through exactly the same thing with Ben between 8-9 months. I did CIO and as awful as it was, it worked. Keep on a schedule and a routine, that is so incredibly important. Some moms think I was a crazy sleep freak, and was really strict on when his naps/sleep was, but now with Ben's ability to fall asleep on his own and happy, it's something that I don't regret doing.
But I did find, that his meltdowns were either attributed to: teeth, a new milestone (learning to crawl/standing up) or even the need to drop a nap. That's it. If you can figure out one of these, you're golden. It takes a while of trial and error but once you've got it - it helps. What are their naps like? What time do they wake up in the morning, nap and when do they sleep for the night? I lived by the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" until he went to daycare at 12 months, and then we just took it from there.
I hope this helps. I really wish these guys came with a manual to figure out, but they don't. It gets easier, and then they throw a curve ball at ya, and then it gets easier again. Rinse and repeat.

Wow Mary, this is great advice!

*big hugs* to you Lisa!

KShiz · December 2010

Hugs! Oh the joys of mommy guilt Hopefully you won't have to do it every time.

Maybe you could just have a discussion with Will about the benefits of sleeping and then hug? Oh, wait, that's another board

redshoegirl · December 2010

mrsmauimary:
But I did find, that his meltdowns were either attributed to: teeth, a new milestone (learning to crawl/standing up) or even the need to drop a nap. That's it. If you can figure out one of these, you're golden. It takes a while of trial and error but once you've got it - it helps. What are their naps like? What time do they wake up in the morning, nap and when do they sleep for the night? I lived by the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" until he went to daycare at 12 months, and then we just took it from there.

I first read HSHHB about a month and a half ago and agree - it's a great book! Very helpful, very practical advice - it helped us to get the boys back to sleeping through the night (7.30pm-7am) again.

It's funny you should mention those three things because they were the things I was considering yesterday. I don't think it's another new tooth - I don't see anything even close to emerging - and they only have 2 long naps per day (dropping the third was key to them STTN again). So maybe he's working on a milestone? I don't know.

Their naps are very regular - they wake up in the morning at about 6.45am, then have a first nap at 9am. Second nap is at 1pm and then bedtime is 6.30-7pm (usually 7pm but we have been known to move it up a little if they've gotten no sleep during the day).

inamra · December 2010

=( Aww, yeah, it's rough. I let B CIO for a few minutes sometimes now, but he still needs me (or the grandmas, when they're watching him) to patting him or at least touching him to go to sleep. He hates going in his crib. The minute I put him down in the crib, he cries. Sometimes I HAVE to go to the bathroom, so he has no choice but to CIO while I go. But it's rough still. MH is worried about B needing someone to be there with him to go to sleep forever. I think he'll grow out of it but I do wish he'd learn to be just a wee bit more independent. But it's hard to hear him bawl his little eyes out =(

kinibruin · December 2010

awww lisa *hugz*

i don't have anything to add.. but i know my sister did the CIO thing with her oldest son and she had the mommy guilt all the time. so i can see how hard it is but i just haven't been there yet...

but *hugz* i know it gets better. hopefully it'll be soon!

mrsmauimary · December 2010

redshoegirl:
mrsmauimary:

But I did find, that his meltdowns were either attributed to: teeth, a new milestone (learning to crawl/standing up) or even the need to drop a nap. That's it. If you can figure out one of these, you're golden. It takes a while of trial and error but once you've got it - it helps. What are their naps like? What time do they wake up in the morning, nap and when do they sleep for the night? I lived by the book "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Baby" until he went to daycare at 12 months, and then we just took it from there.

I first read HSHHB about a month and a half ago and agree - it's a great book! Very helpful, very practical advice - it helped us to get the boys back to sleeping through the night (7.30pm-7am) again.

It's funny you should mention those three things because they were the things I was considering yesterday. I don't think it's another new tooth - I don't see anything even close to emerging - and they only have 2 long naps per day (dropping the third was key to them STTN again). So maybe he's working on a milestone? I don't know.

Their naps are very regular - they wake up in the morning at about 6.45am, then have a first nap at 9am. Second nap is at 1pm and then bedtime is 6.30-7pm (usually 7pm but we have been known to move it up a little if they've gotten no sleep during the day).

Great schedule for them btw! That's exactly where I had Ben at that stage. He dropped the 9am nap when I started going back to work (12 months). Perhaps it's a milestone coming on soon or maybe (food related). And lastly, don't forget about ear infections. That one threw me for a loop. Stay on schedule and hopefully Will will get back on track.

mrspresley · December 2010

don't feel bad! in the end they will get more rest and be better off. i found that i had to do that too. for whatever reason she started to wake up and she'd be screaming/wailing and if i let her CIO she'd go right back to sleep...for another 1.5-2 hrs!!! that tells me she needs the rest but for whatever reason woke up. it is usually only 1-2 min but it feels like forever. sometimes it is longer, like 10 min but that is rare now. i think she just wants to see if someone will come and get her and when she realizes no one is coming she just goes back to sleep.

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