My MIL brought nothing to the shower — The Bump
January 2011 Moms

My MIL brought nothing to the shower

Not even a card.  Again.  She did the same at my bridal shower.  And the wedding.  At least this time she showed up within the first hour and said something about her giftless-ness at the end.  I just wish she'd buy a card.  And DH doesn't understand why I think she doesn't like me.  Says it's just the way she is =(

On the bright side, though, I did have an awesome shower and we got gifts almost entirely from the registry!  No one gave us clothes or blankets... I guess that's a result of being team green.  My sister and niece flew in, my aunts drove hours to be there, and my friends were all in one place.  I didn't even have to pay attention to my low-sugar diet for the day - doctor's orders!  It was very cool. 

Re: My MIL brought nothing to the shower

  • Hey you're a step ahead of me.  My MIL just didn't show at all.
  • I'm sorry to hear that. I like to say my mil brings nothing to the table but don't tell DH I wrote that. LOL.
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  • Ouch. I agree that a card would have been a really nice gesture, at least filled with kind words or advice. I love how easy it is for spouses (myself included) to dismiss our parents' behavior so easily.
  • I think it would be hard to interpret is as "that is how she is" versus her not liking me too.  Glad the rest of it was good!
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  • SO's mother didn't even show up to mine. I think it hurt his feelings.. She has wanted no part of this pregnacy or has been supportive of Aidan's arrival. I know she doesn't like me.

     

    Hailey Addison- 6 years Aidan Zachary- 2 years Baby #3- 22 weeks
  • Ugh.  I'm sorry to those whose MILs didn't even show.  Puts it in perspective, I guess.  At least she's passive-aggressive instead of aggressive-aggressive about not liking me!
  • image dec07nj:
    Ugh.  I'm sorry to those whose MILs didn't even show.  Puts it in perspective, I guess.  At least she's passive-aggressive instead of aggressive-aggressive about not liking me!

    Still kinds sucks though because she should be there for her grand kid, you know? Oh well

  • My MIL didn't bring anything to my shower either... and she was over an hour late and came in somewhat grumpy. I don't think she likes me either, but DH says that is just how she is... I just don't get it! She is also not fond of becoming a grandma... 

    She has always been this way though. When we were planning our wedding we were out to dinner with her and she looked at my DH and told him it wasn't too late to back out, and to not go complaining to her in a few years when he realizes that getting married was the biggest mistake ever!! Whether or not she was kidding, I didn't like it at all!!!!! 

  • image garnet1981:
    Hey you're a step ahead of me.  My MIL just didn't show at all.

    Neither did mine.  No one from my husband's family bothered to show up, send a gift, or even RSVP.

    ~Mom to an amazing Jan 2011 boy~
    ~EDD Nov 18, 2017 with my IUI success story~


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  • My MIL is usually the one in the corner mopping at the shower or being dramatic and rude and this time she was the star! I was shocked at her gifts. She bought all DD's bedding/rug/blankets/wall decal off my PBK registry and as you know that is not cheap. Then she bought like 8 outfits and did a hospital care bag for me with everything I would need at the shower #2 that she hosted for me. Just Crazy! She is never like this, in fact DH and I don't get a long much with her lol Maybe someday your MIL will make it up to u too :0)
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  • My MIL got us a great gift, but then complained that it was only online, so she couldn't use her 20% off coupon.  Okay then, don't buy it!  She came to the shower, but made a big scene when she left in the middle of opening presents, only an hour and a half into my four hour long shower Indifferent.  Needless to say, DH was not happy and made it known at Thanksgiving! 
    Married 11/28/09*BFP 12/16/09*Missed M/C @ 10 wks (measured 8 wks)*D&E 1/29/10*2nd BFP 5/22/10*DS born on his EDD 1/26/11

    *XBFing*XRFing*CDing SAHM*

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  • image dec07nj:
    Ugh.  I'm sorry to those whose MILs didn't even show.  Puts it in perspective, I guess.  At least she's passive-aggressive instead of aggressive-aggressive about not liking me!

     

    I like that.  I can tell that dh and I have been married for a while now when that makes me laugh instead of feel sorry for myself.

  • Why would she not even bring a card? If you know shes like this why do you continue to invite her?
  • I am so sorry. My MIL brought a bag full of goodies but had to leave early.
  • I have the exact opposite problem.  My wonderful MIL showed up along with lots of DH's relatives even though they had a death in the family that week.  My family however literally not on of them came, not even my mom or dad.
  • Don't feel so bad. My own brother brought nothing to our wedding, not even a card and never got us a wedding gift after the fact. He went to my baby shower and the same thing, no gift and not even a card. His excuse is "I don't know what to buy" and I tell him to look at the registry.
    Joseph Michael - 12/22/2010
    5lbs 9 oz, 18.5 inches long
    6 months: 16lbs 15 oz, 27 inches long

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  • Like so many others, my MIL did not show to my shower either. DH called her at once when we found out we were pregnant. After that, not a word. We can't even get her to answer the phone or wave at us when we see her passing by in her car. I'm almost 35 weeks and she doesn't even know were having a girl :( I feel bad for DH. But we heard through the grapevine that she's upset with us for not calling her on Thanksgiving. WTF!!!

    My own mother didn't show for the shower either. Oh well. At least DH and I can relate to one another. Thank God for our friends! We are blessed to have such an "extended family."

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