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Parenting
Kiwi Fruit, 10.2.06 & Ellie Bug, 4.5.09
Stepping into the confession booth: I am such an ass.
My sister had her baby Sunday at 2am via c-section (never started the induction because baby seemed big and his heart rate was a little unstable). She had planned to BF but after her first night in the hospital trying to get him to latch, etc. she seemed ready to give up on nursing. I went to see her, encouraged her to use the lactation nurse and keep at it, and told her not to let anyone make her feel bad about whatever she decided to do. I left pretty sure she had already decided not to continue BF'ing.
Then I went home, texted my best friend that I was bummed my sister was giving up nursing already and wasn't even willing to ask for help or try longer than a day first...
and accidentally sent the text to my sister.
Like I said: I am an ass.
I hate judgy moms and have nothing against formula--both of my girls had it, too--so it's not that I thought she made the "wrong" choice. I was just disappointed because I had these visions of being able to help and support her, and how she'd come to enjoy BF'ing the way I had, if she'd only given it a chance. I never, ever would have said anything like that text to her face, and never had any right to say it at all. It's not about me. She had a c-section and was in more pain than I ever was as a new mom. She has every right to do what she wants. I know all of this...and yet, instead of supporting her, I made her feel horrible and judged.
Fortunately for me, she was unbelievably gracious, accepted my apology, and did not tell me to go eff myself, which is probably what I would have done. She said she knows people won't always agree with what she does as a mom, but that's ok with her because she knows she's doing what's best for her and her family. I couldn't be more proud of her for that.
Talk about a huge lesson for me. Note to self: try not to be such an ass. And be careful who you send assy text messages to.
Then I went home, texted my best friend that I was bummed my sister was giving up nursing already and wasn't even willing to ask for help or try longer than a day first...
and accidentally sent the text to my sister.
Like I said: I am an ass.
I hate judgy moms and have nothing against formula--both of my girls had it, too--so it's not that I thought she made the "wrong" choice. I was just disappointed because I had these visions of being able to help and support her, and how she'd come to enjoy BF'ing the way I had, if she'd only given it a chance. I never, ever would have said anything like that text to her face, and never had any right to say it at all. It's not about me. She had a c-section and was in more pain than I ever was as a new mom. She has every right to do what she wants. I know all of this...and yet, instead of supporting her, I made her feel horrible and judged.
Fortunately for me, she was unbelievably gracious, accepted my apology, and did not tell me to go eff myself, which is probably what I would have done. She said she knows people won't always agree with what she does as a mom, but that's ok with her because she knows she's doing what's best for her and her family. I couldn't be more proud of her for that.
Talk about a huge lesson for me. Note to self: try not to be such an ass. And be careful who you send assy text messages to.
Kiwi Fruit, 10.2.06 & Ellie Bug, 4.5.09
My blog: Bear With Us
Ideas on Teaching Your Toddler/Preschooler at Home
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Stepping into the confession booth: I am such an ass.
Kiwi Fruit, 10.2.06 & Ellie Bug, 4.5.09
My blog: Bear With Us
Ideas on Teaching Your Toddler/Preschooler at Home
Say Three Hail Mary's (the original mom who judged no mom's)
and buy your sis a can of formula.
you are forgiven.
in the name of the bubbies, the utes and the holy spermies, Amen.
Love this.
Oh no! Whoopsie is right
I cannot imagine how incredibly awful you must've felt when you realized you sent that text to your sister. I am so sorry you had to go through that and big thumbs up to your sister for being so understanding. I am sure she knows you are an amazingly supportive sister and a wonderful person so forgiving you was not hard at all.
And a huge congrats on your nephew! Your girls must be thrilled with their new cousin.
Ryan 5/2010, Kyle 1/2007, Eric 3/2005
you just made coffee shoot up my nasal cavity. ouch. lol