NY metro area moms - commute time?

ShufflerChick · December 2010

I live in Westchester and currently enjoy a 15 minute drive into work, but I'm considering a job opportunity that would put me back into the city and would mean trading my short drive for an hour+ train and subway commute. I wouldn't mind being back in the city, most jobs are there anyway, but I'm worried about the commute, even though I know it's pretty normal for the area.

So tell me, what's your commute time, train or drive, and how do you feel about it? If you do the suburbs to city train thing, what would you advise? Thanks!

duchess0727 · December 2010

I commuted from central NJ to the city for the first year after my son was born. I left my house at 6:50, took a 7:10 train to get to work at 8:30. I left work at 4:50 to get a 5:12 train and got to daycare most days at 6:20 to get my son. We got home between 6:30 and 6:45. I worked on the train most days so I worked from home on Fridays. It was exhausting and after a year, I was too tired to function and a little cranky about my job so I found a job closer to home. That was 2.5 years ago and I make it into the city about once every month or two and I can't imagine doing the commute again. My life is so much easier without the commute and I get to see my kids so much more. At this point, I just can't trade that. I miss working in the city and I feel my job options are so much more limited but I'm just going to live with that. In fact, I was there for training yesterday and so happy today to just sit in my car for 25 minutes to get to work. I know people do it all the time and I think you have a nanny which certainly makes it easier, but it makes for a very long day so if you can find a job you like closer to home (or stay where you are) it might be worth it.

ShufflerChick · December 2010

Thanks for your thoughts, duchess, that's what I was afraid of. The hours at the potential company would be better, but with the commute, I'd actually be away from home longer than I am now, I guess that's what I was really concerned about. Plus, I wouldn't be able to get home on a moment's notice like I can now. I am spoiled by my short commute, it is so hard to find anything decent that could even come close.

MammaBear81 · December 2010

I live in Westchester (Yorktown) and I generally drive to work (about 30 minutes to White Plains). I've had to take the train a few times, and that meant having someone drive me to the katonah station (15 minutes away) take a train to WP (about 30 min ride) and then walk 10 minutes to work. so it more than doubles my commute time, plus it's $14 for a round trip ticket (more than what I'd pay in gas)... My dad commuted for YEARS to the city.. he drove to the North WP station, and took the train in (I think the express is about 50 minutes) I'd say go for it if it's REALLY good money, and you don't mind the added travel time.... I personally would KILL for a 15 minute commute to work! Oh, and my dad changed his hours so he didn't have to deal with traffic, I think he worked 7-3 or something like that.. I don't know if you'd be able to do that, but that would be a plus! GL!

jerzeygirl4ever · December 2010

I considered it but not right now. Maybe in the future when she is a bit older and I might have an opportunity to work 1 or 2 days from home. As it is now I only get about 3 hours a day with her. I did the commute from Monmouth Cty when I interned and that was a long day without kids.

ShufflerChick · December 2010

Thanks everyone for your input. Seems the consensus is that it's not worth it, which I was leaning towards anyway.

MammaBear - I'd love to work in White Plains. That's where I live.

jteneback · December 2010

I live it NJ and it blows. I leave the house at 7:30 and get to the office at 9:15 IF my train is on time. I plan to start working Fridays from home when I come back from maternity leave, but I am still trying to negotiate a second day from home because I'm not sure I will be able to do it.

cookingdude · December 2010

I live outside Manhattan as close as you can actually get to the city. Takes me an hour and includes a bus, train, and then subway. It is exhausting.

Having grown up in Westchester, and spent part of my adult life there, the commute is very different. I used to find Metro North very relaxing and would read/pay bills/etc. on the ride. (can't do that on the subway). I found the hardest part to be the shovelling in the winter and drivign to the station. Commuting sux!

MammaBear81 · December 2010

ShufflerChick:
Thanks everyone for your input. Seems the consensus is that it's not worth it, which I was leaning towards anyway.
MammaBear - I'd love to work in White Plains. That's where I live.

Where do you work? Maybe we can switch jobs!

JillAly · December 2010

This post is giving me a heart attack.

I live in Manhattan right now. It's still a 55 min. commute for me to get downtown because I take both kids with me on the subway to get them to daycare near my office.

We're in the process of looking for homes - either in Westchester or NJ. From what you're all saying, my commute is going to get a lot worse! Your stories are making me want to stay in the city...or move out of the area altogether!

July_2009 · December 2010

I live in central NJ and commute to the city. The commute is HORRIBLE! About 2 hours door to door. Since I have had LO, I drive because I drop him off at day care and then drive into a train station close to NYC and then take train from there. It is much harder in the winters with snow and everything.

I am looking for jobs in central NJ and would love to move if I find something suitable. From my experience, I would suggest you look for a job closer or have a nanny if you get your dream job in manhattan.GL.

ShufflerChick · December 2010

MammaBear81:
Where do you work? Maybe we can switch jobs!

I work in Greenwich, CT. Great short commute, but just time for a change, and practically everything is in the city!

What field are you in, if you don't mind my asking?

ShufflerChick · December 2010

JillAly:
This post is giving me a heart attack.

I live in Manhattan right now. It's still a 55 min. commute for me to get downtown because I take both kids with me on the subway to get them to daycare near my office.

We're in the process of looking for homes - either in Westchester or NJ. From what you're all saying, my commute is going to get a lot worse! Your stories are making me want to stay in the city...or move out of the area altogether!

I would LOVE to move back to the city, but we just can't afford the life we would want there. =( Plus a suburb really is much livable with small children with all the extra space.

I can't imagine taking kids on the subway during rush hour. We have a nanny and it makes life SO much easier in that respect.

JillAly · December 2010

ShufflerChick:
JillAly:

This post is giving me a heart attack.

I live in Manhattan right now. It's still a 55 min. commute for me to get downtown because I take both kids with me on the subway to get them to daycare near my office.

We're in the process of looking for homes - either in Westchester or NJ. From what you're all saying, my commute is going to get a lot worse! Your stories are making me want to stay in the city...or move out of the area altogether!

I would LOVE to move back to the city, but we just can't afford the life we would want there. =( Plus a suburb really is much livable with small children with all the extra space.

I can't imagine taking kids on the subway during rush hour. We have a nanny and it makes life SO much easier in that respect.

I didn't plan to have 2 kids and still be here. I had rough pregnancies and I had to sell my apartment before we could move. Now we're cramped into a 1 bedroom apartment for a year while we find a place. I agree that the suburbs are much more livable - I need SPACE!!!! Plus, sharing a toilet with a kid who is toilet training is just not fun

The subway isn't too bad most of the time. People usually give my son a seat and sometimes even give me (carrying a baby in a bjorn) a seat. It's only when my son has a meltdown and is crying/sitting on the ground that everyone hates us!

My dh is from Texas and he tells me about how you can live in a mansion for $300,000. It makes me wonder why we all live in NY!

Bronxgirl73 · December 2010

I also work in White Plains. I drive in from Riverdale so it takes me about 30-45 mts, depending on traffic. I previously lived in Manhattan and it took me 2 hrs to get to work in the AM. I walked to the subway, took 2 subways to Grand Central, took Metro North to White Plains train station and then my workplace had a shuttle bus from the train station to the hospital. i did it for four years and then got burned out on commuting.

Halo79RN · December 2010

omg, I live on Staten Island and just to get from the southern end to the north shore where I work, it's 40-50 minutes... and that's using the expressway (only 15 min on the expressway, it's driving through the northshore that takes so long). I have made it to midtown (driving) on a low traffic time in about an hour. when I'd take the ferry and subway to a book club in Murray Hill, it would take about an hour and a half. 30 min on the train in SI, 30 ferry, then maybe 20 in Manhattan. then walking time.

Jill.... it's not worth it. dh is looking elsewhere. I think for people who grew up here, it's the norm. they don't imagine anything different... and let's face it, there are a great number of opportunities here that you would not have elsewhere. But we grew up with a different lifestyle. I would like the quiet front porch with a sweet iced tea in my hand in the evenings. and the cute little downtown that is pretty quiet to walk through in the evenings mid week. moving here was not my 1st choice... but it was dh's job offer (when he finished his post doc and needed to move on). now he's almost completed his contract and is actively looking for a new job. doesn't help that his pay doesn't vary much from what he'd make in central PA. Our expenditures literally tripled here. our household income did not. my hourly isn't even double what it was. not. worth. it. I'd rather live else where and come back here as a tourist. not that I don't love the city. we have fun when we're off at the same time. I would just like to have a more "traditional" home/neighborhood for my kids. what we're used to. now, if he doesn't get a new job, I'll be fine... but here is not what I wanted for when we had children. I told him when he was in grad school after one of our visits to the city. want to do you post doc there, fine... but I don't want to raise children there. guess it's all what you're used to.

darkskyy · December 2010

I take NJ transit to penn, then the subway 2 stops. About an hour 20.

It was miserable before LO, and I'm dreading the end of m-leave. 3 hours of commuting is 3 hours less that I get with DS.

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