2nd Trimester

Still haven't told family and friends...

I have yet to mention to anyone besides DH about our newest addition. To be frank, I don't want to... however as time passes I feel as if I eventually need to. I honestly do NOT want to hear the "again" speech. WWYD (who, what, when, where why?)
Photobucket Corrine & Jason

Re: Still haven't told family and friends...

  • what do you mean the again speech??
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  • Of course, time and your body will eventually speak for you, if you don't make it a priority to say anything (and who says you have to?). Unfortunately, people will react how they choose to, and there's no way to control it.

    Given my...inexperienced...state, I would simply post a picture online (if you're an avid social networking user) and let everyone else do the math. I imagine that people are less prone to say negative (or potentially negative) things if they see how excited you are.

  • I already have three lovely little ones. I just feel like I will hear that "Your pregnant again" speech. I did with last baby. I am just honestly over it. DD was planned so it was to be expected, but this LO was what you would call a birth control failure.
    Photobucket Corrine & Jason
  • Do you have a lot of kids? I'm not sure what the "not again" speech is or why you would get it.

    I think sometimes people are surprised when couples have more than 2 kids but I wouldn't let that keep me from being happy and sharing about my newest LO. DH and I plan on having 3-4 and I don't plan on hiding it from anyone. If they don't like it, too bad for them, they don't have to raise them or provide for them so I don't see how it's any of their business. 


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  • imagescarlettrose12:
    what do you mean the again speech??

     

    Yes this! But I can definitely vouch for this speech getting old.

    To "announce" this pregnancy, we told our family and then posted a video on facebook that was titled "If you don't watch this, I'll know"

    Now if people act all surprised I can say, "You didn't watch my video did you" and then that pretty much bypasses all the speeches.

     

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  • UGH... stupid ppl and their comments. I just don't want to feel like I need to explain myself. I am a grown married woman who is financially stable. However my family and friends can be condescending... (Yes, because you are god's gift to the planet.) I truly just want to say f-it. it is what it is. I am excited so is DH. However, I am one of those who can get emotionally wrapped up and let others make me feel bad. (My aunt and best friend both have had serious issues with conceiving and early delivery. I don't know if they are mad with me for getting pregnant, or just beacuse... make sense?

    So sry if I blabbed on, I am just truly stressed out about this whole situation.

    Photobucket Corrine & Jason
  • My mom had 5 kids and got this same reaction with 4 and 5. But she was happy and that was all that mattered. You are excited and happy about this and screw what other people say!


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  • I am also on my 4th baby, but this one was a surprise and my youngest daughter is 13.  When you decide to tell them just let them know how you are feeling and that you really don't want any speeches.  If you put it out there in the beginning it will help friends and family know where you stand.  You don't have to be mean or anything at all.  Just give your own speech before you give the news. 
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  • I would just tell people with no apologies or shame.  I would be ecstatic when I told them.  If they give condescending remarks I would say ONCE " I don't want to hear it."  If they continue, I would leave/ hang up with my head held high. 

    They have no say on what you choose to do with your uterus. 

    If they try to give you "advice", I would say " Do you know what the best kind of advice is, the solicited kind." 

  • imagenething4him:

    UGH... stupid ppl and their comments. I just don't want to feel like I need to explain myself. I am a grown married woman who is financially stable. However my family and friends can be condescending... (Yes, because you are god's gift to the planet.) I truly just want to say f-it. it is what it is. I am excited so is DH. However, I am one of those who can get emotionally wrapped up and let others make me feel bad. (My aunt and best friend both have had serious issues with conceiving and early delivery. I don't know if they are mad with me for getting pregnant, or just beacuse... make sense?

    So sry if I blabbed on, I am just truly stressed out about this whole situation.

    A lot of time people who have trouble conceiving have trouble accepting that other people do get pregnant, and it is a very difficult journey for them to learn to be happy for others.  I would not take anything they say to heart.  Tell people when you are comfortable with it, but just don't let anyone else bring you down.  This is a very exciting thing in your life and you can't let other peoples negative attitude towards your pregnancy get in the way of that excitement.

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  • imagenething4him:
    but this LO was what you would call a birth control failure.

    That is really nobody's business. I wouldn't even mention it to anyone, anytime, anywhere. I would just tell people in a very simple, matter of fact way .... and don't entertain negative thoughts or words. If everyone wants to be annoying and nasty? Their problem.

    "DH and I are excited to tell you that we are expecting a new addition! We are over the moon about this and know that our friends and families will be too."

    Done. If you start getting the negative talk, vut them off and just say, "Well, we couldn't be happier." Then change the subject. And if they don't get the hint, then you need to be flat out honest.... "What you are saying hurts my feelings and I will not have the conversation again. Thank you."

    ~Lisa~
    Mommy to Rachel 1.15.06 and Ashley 5.17.11
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  • Honey i sooo feel you. This is also our 4th child! And i am 26 and dh is 30 And we so didnt want to tell his parents b/c even with our 3rd his family said the same thing yours did , AGAIN. And again like you i shouldnt care what they think, but deep down it did bug me to an extent. i mean this is what we wanted not them so they can get over it. With this one we didn't tell anyone for like a few weeks but i was dying bc we were just over the moon excited so i was like you know what screw it, if they dont like it they can just move on. SUPRISINGLY it wasnt as bad as we thought it would be with them.! So, that being said, It's you and YH choice whether you tell or not. Good Luck girl!!!!
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  • It blows my mond how rude people can be. We recieved  A LOT of rude comments about having a third. We are finacially stable, married and have always told everyone that we wanted three, so the rude comments came as quite a suprise to me. I can't imagine the douchy comments people would make over a fourth. Good luck, hold you head high and tell them to piss off if they can't say anything nice.
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  • imagenething4him:

    UGH... stupid ppl and their comments. I just don't want to feel like I need to explain myself. I am a grown married woman who is financially stable. However my family and friends can be condescending... (Yes, because you are god's gift to the planet.) I truly just want to say f-it. it is what it is. I am excited so is DH. However, I am one of those who can get emotionally wrapped up and let others make me feel bad. (My aunt and best friend both have had serious issues with conceiving and early delivery. I don't know if they are mad with me for getting pregnant, or just beacuse... make sense?

    So sry if I blabbed on, I am just truly stressed out about this whole situation.

    Tell THEM this! It's your life, tell them to let you live it and keep their opinions to themselves.

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  • Isn't it unbelievable how judgmental people can be?  Especially about things that really have nothing to do with them! 

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