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Two Under 2
Sending #1 to preschool when #2 get here, helpful or not?
I previously only planned on sending DD to preschool the year or two before kindergarten, but my mom seems to think it would be helpful for me if DD started going when #2 gets here. I'm not sure if it would help or not.
On one hand I know the first few months with a newborn were rough, and having DD (who will be 19mo) out of the house for a few hours might give me a much needed break. On the other hand I think the extra pick ups and drop offs would only add to my stress. (I would send her for a few hours in the am 2-3x a week).
Also, I'm not sure DD will get anything out of it at that young of an age. At 19 months it would be just daycare really, not preschool, right? We already go to library story times 2x a week and a drop-in playtime 1x a week, so I feel she gets plenty of socialization. Plus, I've worked at a preschool before and really, I wasn't impressed (although I would be sending her to a much better, different one, but still).
Your thoughts?
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Re: Sending #1 to preschool when #2 get here, helpful or not?
I am a full time working Mom, so DS1 was in day care before I had DS2. I kept him in 3 days a week while I was on maternity leave. I wanted to keep him in the routine of going and also keep something stable in his life. Plus it gave me some one on one bonding time with DS2. If you can afford it, I think it would be good for her to go a couple of days a week for a couple of hours.
But, if you are going to do it...I would think you might want to start her before the baby comes. You dont want her to see it that she is being "sent away" because of the new baby. I would avoid any big changes shortly before or after the new baby comes home.
Good luck with your decision!!
I think that would have been a HUGE help for me. But ditto the pp - I'd start her either a couple months in advance of #2's arrival or a couple months after. The last thing you want her to do is associate the new baby with her having to go away - breeding grounds for resentment, kwim?!
We had DS signed up for a MDO (mother's day out) church program when we were living in Texas. He was going to start this fall and I think it would have been SO SO nice to have a few mornings a week with just DD. We ended up moving across the country and don't have preschool up here until 3 1/2, which is a huge bummer.
We do all the story times and play groups too, but I think it's good for toddlers to have some time away from mom and dad in a group setting. We joined a gym here with a day care, so DS (and DD) get that experience for an hour a day, 3-4 days a week. I've seen DS's language take off and he realllllly loves going to the "day care" and will ask me to go starting about 5 minutes after he wakes up. (It did take awhile though - be prepared for some initial separation anxiety!) So all that to say, I'd do it, because I think your DD will really enjoy it and you will benefit hugely from some down time with the new baby.
(read it. you know you want to.)
anderson . september 2008
vivian . february 2010
mabel . august 2012
My son is in a MDO program two days a week for five hours. We decided to do it before I knew I was pregnant with #2, but I am super-thankful that I will have some time alone with the new baby.
I agree that if you want to do it you should get him started at least a couple months before the baby comes...it took my son a few weeks to adjust, get over the separation axiety, start napping there etc. It was sort of a stressful time for me, and I wouldn't want to deal with that with a newborn. Now he LOVES it and I think it's so good for him to a) be around other kids, and b) learn to be away from mama!
I guess it will be a bit of a task to get everyone packed up on the days I have to take him, but I figure it'll force me to learn to get out with both of them....and I have a wonderful MIL who is always happy to come pick him up and drop him off for me if I need her to.
Good luck with your decision!
This...except i kept DD1 in FULL time while i was on maternity leave. Would not have had it any other way. You need time to heal and get to know #2. You had a maternity leave with #1 right? Same idea
Where I come from we don't start preschool until 3.5 ish, so when I moved here and people I knew were sending their kids at 18 months, I was shocked. I see how it helps though, I am just not ready for it. I also didnt want the extra germs in the house (though we do gymboree...I feel like we got enough germs from there one day a week for an hour). Also I didnt want to have to drop off/pick up if baby was sleeping etc. Mainly, I didnt think he was ready and neither was I. I did have a babysitter come 2-3 hours a week for one day to help me out. I would take DD with me to the grocery, and let the sitter stay with him and play. He got attention from her, she wore him out, and I got time away with a sleeping newborn (which was like being alone).
Now I have a sitter come once a week still when My DH is gone for his 3 wks at work. Its necessary.
We probably won't start preschool til the earliest next sept, but maybe the following sept. Its the right decision for us.