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LifesPeachy
member
Having a hard time (long)
LifesPeachy
member
Hello Everyone,
I'm having a hard time with my recent move so I thought I'd write about here, to get it off my chest at least.
DH and I moved here from the East Coast at the very end of September. We stayed in corporate housing in Seattle for the first 5 weeks. Then we moved into a house we bought in Shoreline. I was only here in my new house for a few days before I flew back east for Thanksgiving, I was there 12 days. DH spent a few more days here and then went to the UK, he'll be back tomorrow evening.
Now we're back, we came back yesterday (DD and I). I'm slowly working on unpacking the house. I hate being in transition- boxes around, no curtains up, the house in general disarray (I'm a super tidy person and everything has it's place). So I know just that is adding to my stress level. I can only do so much in one day, due to my pregnancy. So it's slow going but given the fact that I've only been here 3 full days in total I really have gotten a lot done.
Another thing that is stressing me out is DH new work schedule. Before we moved from the east, he worked from home and I worked out of the house as a school nurse in DDs school. I pretty much hated my job and knew baby was coming in February and desperately wanted to stay home. DH had been looking for a job for months before this one fell into his lap and it was too good of an opportunity to pass up (ie: good salary, we really wanted to live in a city (our previous town was BORING), they paid for all our moving expenses).
I liked that DH was at home, he was there when I left for work and was so sweet helping me and DD get out the door, he was there when I got home- I had short work hours since it was a school and we were together a lot more. But he didn't really like the work he was doing, we both felt he should maybe get out of the house to work for a change of scenary, hopefully make friends.
He moved from the UK 4 years ago to be with me and hasn't met anyone since. Like I said, our town was boring, not a lot of forward thinkers, I had a few friends but most of my friends left a while ago. We just did family stuff mostly, with my parents and my sisters family. So thats all the reasons we needed to move and DH find another job. He never would've found a job in our old town, we knew we'd be moving to a city so he could find work, but never thought this far away. His salary doubled, we're in an awesome city, we have a lovely home, I get to be a SAHM. Now he's gone from about 7:45am to after 6pm, sometimes its 7,8,9pm.. He often works when he gets home or on the weekends.. He says he's going to work from home one day a week now that we're in our house and not small apt- that will help.
I really miss him 
We're in this awesome city but I don't have him around to enjoy it. And I really really miss my twin sister. She had a baby 5 weeks ago, and has 14 month old twins. I adore those kids 
I didn't get to meet the baby until I went home for Thanksgiving. The twins grew so much in the 8 weeks I was gone. If I was back east, I never would've been able to stay home with my baby back east because DH wouldn't have found work out of the house there (ie- benefits!, I carried the benefits so couldn;t quit until he found a job that carried benefits). I'd be working all day, would be tired in the evenings and would still only see them all for a few hours on the weekends. So I keep telling myself, I'll actually see them more now when I visit if you count the total hours (I'm deluding myself 
).
I was lucky I could go home so soon, even though it's on the credit card! I can't go home again till this summer, since I'm due in Feb. I am hoping to go home 3 times a year, that's being optimistic. I really hope my parents will come at least once a year, they are talking about coming out in April to meet our new baby. My twin will probably never come because she doesn't have much extra income at all, neither does my older sister. I'd be willing to pay for parts of their tickets once in a while, if we could.
Anyway, I'm just feeling it all right now. House in disarray, miss my family (I was spoiled while I was there), miss my DH who I haven't seen in two weeks- he'll be home tomorrow. Thinking of how I'll be lonely during the day while DD is at school (starts tomorrow- had two weeks off for our move and then Thanksgiving), at least until LO gets here. No friends or family here, DH working long hours.
Ok, pity party over. Thanks for listening 
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Having a hard time (long)
Welcome to your new home!
If you just get to January it will be smooth after that. Give yourself & your husband some time to adjust to the new work schedule, and try to get outside once a day...it really helps.
Thank you both
) I was thinking that once January got here, things would move fast until LO got here. Also my MIL is coming out in February to help with LO, maybe I'll have her come sooner in Jan.
Also, when do people join baby groups? How old is baby usually? Maybe I'll meet people that way.
Welcome! It probably doesn't help that you're here in this horrible weather, basically a shut-in. Having a little sun makes everything just a little better... be prepared that the next few months will be rough, but it WILL get better. Hope your hubby gets the work situation figured out soon...
In the meantime, if you don't have it, I definitely recommend Skype! We use it to keep in touch with my entire family... it is so great to see my little nieces back in Michigan, or talk with my niece in Grenada, and my family can see my LO growing. It makes up for the long times between visits back hom.
I'm going to make an AWESOME big brother.
Bio & Blog | The Chic Bambino | Bumps & Babies Fair
Welcome to Seattle! I'm sorry you are having such a hard time with the move. I will get better though and having your MIL here will help a lot, even if it isn't your side of the family. I would also recommend Skype! That way you can actually see them and see your nieces/nephews grow - and the same with your DD and the impending LO. I also echo a pp who said PEPs. I have heard wonderful things about the group.
Good luck!
You have a lot of major changes going on right now, no wonder you are stressed and having a hard time. Once you get a little more settled and into a routine, you will feel a little better. It's hard to be so disheveled. You also came at the start of winter, and we are supposed to have a doosy this year. Like PPs have said, everything seems a little better with sunshine.
Try to get out and figure out your neighborhood/city. There are tons of little coffee places that you can go to and have some tea, or whatever your pleasure is, to unwind. We have semi-regular get togethers as a board. Look for those. And most of us SAHM/WAHM would be up for a walk, coffee, chat. I have made some great friends off of this board.
Also, IHHM's rec of PEPs is a great one. I didn't join a PEPs group with my first, but I definately will with my second. You are also really close to great trails and parks. It would be a great mood lifter if you got out to Green Lake or Burke Gilman Trail and walked everyday. If you need anything, the women on this board are wonderful and can help with recommendations. They are also a great shoulder to cry on. Welcome and don't be a stranger.
The only Easter Bunny I can get behind.
Maxwell Joseph 4/09 Lucy Violet 10/12