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3rd Trimester
As you get closer to delivery- what are your fears?
I have heard many women say the closer they get to their due date the more afraid of labor and delivery they get. For some reason my fears are not really about the labor and birthing process.
I am a little scared of the pushing but not too much. I am afraid, very afraid, of having a c-section if I end up needing one.
My biggest fear by far is that something will be wrong with her when she is born. I have been high risk this whole pregnancy and at the start of the pregnancy i watched all kinds of shows about babies in the NICU and what not. Yesterday I went over to the m/c board and was reading of babies who passed when mom was 22 or 33 wks. That scared me so bad I was shaken the rest of the day.
But almost ALL of my other fears center around the actual baby being here and at home with us. I get literal panic attacks when I think about bringing her home and having to take care of her. I worry that I won't bond with her, how it will change the relationship between FI and I, how the money thing will work out, and whether or not he will bond with her too.
What do you fear? Have your fears gotten more intense the closer you get to delivery?
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Re: As you get closer to delivery- what are your fears?
As far as the actual delivery: getting an episiotomy (ouch!) and poopin' on the table.
As far as post-partum, I haven't really thought of it I guess. More than anything I just don't want everyone in my family fussing over me and baby constantly and I do want them to let me figure it out and ask for help when I need it. I've always been that way. I'll definitely ask for help, I just hate when people try to take over.
I'm afraid I won't be able to enjoy (as much as you can enjoy something painful ; )) my labor and delivery because of the pelvic fracture or I'll end up in surgery immediately following the birth and not get to see my baby for hours.
I'm afraid the baby will have to be transferred since my hospital doesn't have a NICU.
I'm afraid of being put on Mag sulfate for the pre-eclampsia. It's under control now but I've heard nothing but horror stories about that drug.
This is me too.
Obviously getting him here safely is my number one concern.
I've always thought of birth as a right-of-passage type thing. Something amazing that women get to experience. I'm honestly not scared of birth itself at all. I'm actually quiet excited.
About the pushing thing, if you're having an epidural, it should be in full effect by then! If you're going med-free, I've often heard women describe pushing as a "relief". Laboring is difficult because you can't really tell when the end is coming, but once you get to the pushing stage you know he/she will be here soon and your attitude changes (supposedly
)
Anyways, GL!
I am more fearful of what life will be like when we get home than actual delivery. I think I've just prepared my mind and body for delivery so the confidence is now there but I need to do something to reassure myself about caring for the baby once he's here.
I think my greatest fears are financial based (we still haven't found a daycare that we can afford) and also I'm really worried about being a good mom (having the patience and knowing what he needs). I am also a little concerned that something will go wrong or be wrong when he comes out.
Yikes!
I'm afraid of my delivery being the same as it was with DD. She was caught because her head was crooked and the pain was so intense I vomited at least 20 times. I had such bad swelling that they called the doc for a c-section because I never fully dilated. He decided to let me try pushing before doing the c-section and thankfully she was able to be delivered vaginally.
I just hope things go a little bit smoother this time.
I am afraid of needles so all the poking has me worried.
I am also scared to tear really bad.... my lady bits hurt just thinking about it.
I am very, very afraid of having to have a c-section. I want to if possible have a natural childbirth for the health benefits for both baby and me, but am very afraid of having an emergency c. I don't do doc's/needles/sharp objects and having watched the c-sections on television where the curtain is up in front of the mom's face so she can't see what's going on down below - I just get teary eyed thinking about it. If I had to have a scheduled c-section due to health issues, I would certainly request to be put under for it but not sure if that's an option for an emergency one.
I really have no foundation for being so worried about it, I've had a normal, risk-free pregnancy for the most part (a small spina bifida scare that turned out to be a false positive at 20 weeks) and no family history of needing c-sections and the doc said that baby was measuring right on schedule the last time I was in.
Thank you for posting, it felt good to be able to discuss this with other women at the same point I'm at.
This! I am terrified of the recovery after delivery. L&D don't make me so nervous - I feel like that's a temporary pain that will pass and end in something wonderful - but I'm scared I'll be in pain for weeks afterwards.
I'm also a little worried about how DH will react to our baby boy once he's here. I have a three-year-old SD who I adore and I'm not worried that my relationship with her/new LO will be much different. But I'm afraid DH will be too tough on LO because he's a boy and much easier on his DD because she's a girl. My husband is very much a "man's man", as much as that phrase is relevant anymore, and he'll want a son who's tough and manly. I just don't want him to never cuddle/love on our LO because he's afraid to baby him. No pun intended.
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I'm afraid of being induced and all the interventions that may come after that. My new OB is more cautious about my BP than my previous one (was 140-150/80s, now 120-130/70s with meds). They already have me coming in weekly and I'll start bi-weekly with NSTs at 32 weeks. I'm worried that all this extra monitoring will make them more likely to use "big baby" or "increasing BP" as a reason to induce.
Besides the BP I've had no issues during pregnancy so I'm hoping they'll let her cook as long as she needs.
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Sophia Leigh has arrived! 02.09.11
I am afraid of the unknown of labor. You never know how your labor is going to go. Is is going to be difficult, is it going to be easy? I'm the type of person that needs to be prepared and plan ahead for everything. I like to know how things are going to go.
This is my second baby, so I'm not too concerned about the afterwards part because I'm familiar with it already.
I'm terrified of another labor like my first (55 hours, 4 hours of pushing and a c-section). I just want to push out a baby easily...is that too much to ask?!?! I'm especially scared of the pushing...that was the worst part for me.
I'm also scared to death of having a newborn again. Things are so easy right now with a toddler and I hated the first 6 months of Kate's life. I know every baby is different but I'm scared shiitless.
As a second time mom... I am much more afraid of life with a newborn (make that, a newborn and a toddler) than of the actual L&D.
Good luck everyone!
Im scared of going over 42 weeks and having to go for NST and have my homebirthing plans reevaluated by the backup OB.
I worry my baby's going to be breech... Id still deliver vaginally it would just have to be in the hospital instead of my planned homebirth.
I worry Ill be at babysitting when I go into labor. Then Ill have to wait until the girls mom gets home, then drive myself home. Does NOT sound pleasant. This is the reason I wont be babysitting past 38 weeks.
I'm honestly not worried about the labor and delivery at all. I know my doctor won't force me into anything I'm not comfortable with, so I'm just at peace with all that.
I am worried that LO could get transferred to a hospital 25 miles away if something happened to be wrong because my hospital doesn't have a NICU. I've questioned my decision to deliver there a thousand times, wondering if I'm a bad/selfish mom for it, but I love my doctor so much that I can't imagine delivering with someone else.
I'm worried that I'll deliver at 38 weeks, the weekend my doctor is out of town (otherwise, she delivers all her patients--she doesn't share call with other docs). I'm also worried that I won't make it to 41 weeks (I know, dumb worry), but I want to go to at LEAST 40w5d because that means my maternity leave extends all the way to June 20. (gives us time to attend an out-of-state wedding and travel around a bit to see family)
I'm worried that my currently-transverse baby will stay that way or go breech. I know I have PLENTY of time for him or her to turn head-down, but it's just a small fear I have in the back of my head. A scheduled c-section for that reason would just kill me emotionally, until I got to hold LO in my arms.
And, finally, I'm mildly anxious about finances. I'm going 12 weeks without a paycheck, and although I have Aflac short-term disability and 120 hours of sick/vacation leave to cash in, we'll still be short. Yes, we've been planning for this, and we will be fine...but it still worries me a bit. I also have a random fear that my job will call me while I'm out on leave and say they realized they don't need me anymore (!), so I don't have a job anymore. I know they can't actually do that (my job is protected through a university), but it's an irrational fear that will NOT go away!
I know! I wish there was a like button on TB! lol
Of all the things that could go wrong my worst fear is having a c-section I dunno but I am terrifyed of it. The thought of them cutting me open like that makes me almost bring on a panic attack just thinking about it.
I know it's really silly but it really terrifies me =(
By lilenatalem at 2012-01-28
I don't really have many fears about labor or delivery. I've been through it before which probably helps. I guess one of my real big fears is that my water will break in front of my 17 preschoolers! That would suck!
Thanks for posting this thread-as I enter my 35th week the fear of EVERYTHING is really starting to set in...mostly all of the unknowns of labor and being a first time mom. I'm nervous about what a huge life change this will be and that I won't be a good mom. Hoping those maternal instincts kick in quickly!
Then again, I think about all of the complete morons who have raised children and it makes me feel better. If they can do it, I'm sure I can!