What would you do? (long)

gabbride · November 2010

Hello everyone,

I would like your opinion on a situation. My sister is pregnant with her second child. She's had to do IVF for both of them, so, as a family, we're extremely happy and excited for her. Also, this baby will be the first granddaughter, so we're doubly excited. So because of this, I would like to throw her some sort of party/get together to celebrate the joy of this. Now, I know some say that a second baby shower is tacky, so I didn't want to call it that. She doesn't plan to register and I don't plan to ask for gifts. I was thinking of something like having everyone write something special about my sister and putting it in a book for her future daughter.

To complicate matters, my sister's husband is deployed and she's very stressed/overwhelmed being pregnant with an active 2 yr old worring about her husband in a war zone (he is a army lawyer, but still...) Because of all this, she is very anxious, and having mixed feelings about having this get together.

So, my questions are:

1. Would you have this get together?

2. What do you think about the gift idea? Any other ideas?

3. Any location suggestions? It would be about 10 people...

Thanks so much for reading and sorry if any of it is confusing...

daisyterp · November 2010

I would see if you could have a brunch or mocktail-cocktail party for her- just something where she can relax and chat with her friends.

Instead of gifts maybe you can ask her friends if they would be willing to make a meal for the family once the new baby arrives, and then follow through in organizing this once baby #2 is here.

Several of my neighbors took me and my DD out for breakfast before I had DS. They gave me a card and wrote in it that each of them was going to make a meal for us once I had DS. About a week after DS was born the first woman called me and asked me what we did/didn't like and what night would be good for a dinner. The next week another neighbor called, etc. It was fantastic. People always say "let me know when you want me to bring you dinner," but very few moms feel comfortable saying, next Tuesday and actually accepting the meal.

NovBeth · November 2010

My friends throw a "Sprinkle", rather than a shower, for a second baby. A sprinkle is usually a small get-together with close friends and/or family. It is especially nice when the second child is the opposite gender so that mom can get a few small gifts that are gender specific (clothes, blankets, ect...). I love the PP idea about making meals to share or freeze. Helping to clean her house or getting a service is also a fantastic idea! A friend got me SIX cleaning sessions from a service. It was my FAVORITE gift! Good luck planning. As an IVF mommy, your sister and family are doubly blessed! Congratulations to all!!!

weezie825 · November 2010

I did a stock the freezer party for my cousin when she was pregnant with her second. It was open house style at her home about 2 weeks before her expected delivery date. People were invited to drop by any time during a 2 hour window.

My Aunt, my Mom and I went over to her house and gave it a good scrubbing the morning of the open house. We broght with us drinks, light apps and cookies.

During the open house, people came and went. There weren't a ton of people there at once. Some people dropped off homemade items, some people brought items readymade, pop-in-the-oven type dinners and other peoiple gave gift cards for places in town that delivered. Quite a few people also brought a little something for big-brother-to-be. Overall I think it went really well.

Good Luck whatever you decide to do!

Cooper81 · November 2010

I would definately have it. Maybe have the phrase "Your presence is present enough" so that they know it isn't like a shower, but just a get together to celebrate their family and your sister. Maybe with the invitation you could send a pretty little card where they can write down thoughts about your sister and then they could bring them to the shower. Or maybe do something at the shower like having the cards on a table and maybe a branch in a pot and when they write something on a card they can then hang it on the tree, or something like that.

I think a nice afternoon tea would be nice, we had a shower at the Reynolds Tea room in Annapolis once and my sister went to a shower at a tea room in Ellicot City (can't remember the name). It was nice they had different teas, finger sandwiches, scones, etc so it was very casual, but a little fancy and special. It was also not too expenisve.

KRMac · November 2010

weezie825:
I did a stock the freezer party for my cousin when she was pregnant with her second. It was open house style at her home about 2 weeks before her expected delivery date. People were invited to drop by any time during a 2 hour window.
My Aunt, my Mom and I went over to her house and gave it a good scrubbing the morning of the open house. We broght with us drinks, light apps and cookies.
During the open house, people came and went. There weren't a ton of people there at once. Some people dropped off homemade items, some people brought items readymade, pop-in-the-oven type dinners and other peoiple gave gift cards for places in town that delivered. Quite a few people also brought a little something for big-brother-to-be. Overall I think it went really well.
Good Luck whatever you decide to do!

This is SUCH a good idea. I love it!

jnealet · November 2010

I like the stock the freezer party!!! We always do a small sprinkle for our group of friends and their second babies. Small parties where everyone brings brunch item. Its nice to just celebrate a new life.

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