Tell me I'm not alone....Financial stress...(NBR Rant)

HolliEllison · November 2010

DH and I do relatively well for ourselves. We're both employed, have a nice home and felt totally prepared in TTC. It wasn't until the last month or so that I started feeling stressed out. I'm not sure if it's the stress of feeling like we need to continue nice gifts for the holidays (we had to cut back BIG TIME) or the upcoming arrival of LO but I am so stressed out about finances and being prepared for the baby, etc.

I guess I just need reassurance that I'm not alone in feeling like we're not going to be prepared for this baby...I'm worried about having enough diapers, enough supplies, etc...etc...etc...Hopefully these feelings will subside in time. *Sigh*

McCaskeysMom · November 2010

Girl, you are not alone! We are business owners and just had two major cancellations for Thanksgiving and the transmission on the car is totaled and I don't know what we're going to do! I am trying to do my "trust the universe" mantra and I know everything will be fine because it always is but it's hard when you're this full of hormones. Hang in there.

applepear12 · November 2010

No your not the only one. I feel the same way. I try not to stress to much about it, finacially things always work out for us. What I am greatfull for is that this year were are not buying any gifts. The whole family sat down and decided that we just cant afford it, and were not up for adding more personal debt. So this year were all giving each other the peace of mind of not adding to our debt and maybe even getting rid of some of it. But yes my main concern is not having what i need when little one arrives.Good luck, im sure everything will be fine, just take a step back and breath.

bkleiter · November 2010

You are not the only one... I am honestly not focusing on baby stuff until after the holidays. I have bought some smaller items however trying not to think about the new medical and child care bills that are going to be starting this spring.

My family is not big spenders during the holidays- and as a lot of my family is struggling fin. there isn't going to be a lot of gift exchanging. I am also going to look for deals and not buy because it is cute.

thediarywithin · November 2010

You are not alone at all. My whole family decided to just get the kids gifts this year and not the adults. Everyone is having a hard time with the econmic and it doesn't help that we have the hormones that we are batting as well.

shuaytos · November 2010

I feel the stress even though we were really prepared. When we started ttc we went to the store and calculated how much everything was going to cost , my husband is such the planner. We saved up about 4k in addition to our regular savings just to buy the baby stuff. I still feel stressed. I think it's the unknown. Daycare is going to be $1,200 a month and I really have no idea how much we will be spending on a monthly basis for other things the baby needs. Hard to budget when you don't know. My friends with kids tell me it just works itself out. Hard to trust that. My mom did it. She was a single mom and she made far less money than my husband and I do and she had two of us to deal with. We came out happy and not malnourished. I just keep telling myself that.

sdlaura · November 2010

You're definitely not alone. We are doing great financially in my opinion (we max out our retirement savings to the legal limit and have been saving an extra $1500 per month for daycare for a while), and DH asked me last night on our way home from dinner if we'd have to stop eating out when we have the baby. I think it's just a normal thing to worry about it since there are a lot of unknowns with baby expenses. Just do the best you can and make good choices and you will be fine!

MrsMandyPandy · November 2010

Im currently not working and still a year away from my BA in nursing. So i feel your stress. Plus we have a room mate that is jobless now so it sucks. I have money in savings about six thousand that i was gonna use for emergency but looks like it will go to the baby. We plan on only buying what we need new and getting everything else used. We cut out cell phones down and switched to basic cable. So that will save us over 150 a month just there. And after we have the baby the base that my husband is stationed at has good prices for day care. I think reguardless of how much you plan you never feel ready.

LegalLadyBug · November 2010

So not alone. DH has a full time job and I am a grad student, done in May. We aren't rolling in dough and we do have student loans but we're doing okay for ourselves. Lately I have been getting more and more stressed out about money though. It's not that we don't have money in the bank, we do, and we have enough to pay our bills, I am just increasingly worried we wont have the things we need for LO. I think it must be nesting related or something and I am just starting earlier than the rest of you.

Someone else mentioned their family decided not to do gifts this year, my family is the same way. Things are rough for FIL and StepMIL right now so they have put a ban on gifts. It's actually a good thing for us because the money we have been saving for gifts can now be used on things we need. Usually my Black Fridays are spent running around shopping for others but this year it will be a nice change to be shopping for ourselves, DH needs some clothes and I need a sewing machine (to make my own mat pants, long story lol). I do plan on getting 4 year old SIL a gift because I feel no child should have a giftless Christmas.

catycate · November 2010

You are not alone- and, for many Americans, doing better! My husband just got laid off and I make 30,000/year. We have savings, but those savings will take a huge hit if he doesn't find a job soon! Keep the faith- stressing isn't good for you or the baby (easier said than done, I know!)

mmarsac · November 2010

I completely freaked out about money last week. We are doing okay, but we have a lot of debt left over from school. It's just the sheer amount of stuff we feel like we need to buy for the baby! I also have this feeling that I have no idea what I am doing, and that freaks me out as well. I found out that we're having a girl last week, and it made my pregnancy more real. I think my freak out session probably had a little to do with that and a lot to do with hormones. It's hard during Christmas because you want Christmas to be nice, but you also want to make sure that you don't spend the money you need for the LO.

LynsiBHM · November 2010

Hubby and I both have great jobs. I hope to stay home once the baby is born, but haven't made a solid decision yet because I'm so nervous about the finances. Every time I start to stress, I think of all the less priveleged families that do it every day. One way or another, we will make it work!

sweetpea18 · November 2010

I think it's natural to stress over money, no matter how prepared you are. You are going to responsible for another human's well-being and that's a lot to adjust to!

jdnemmer · November 2010

There are people way poorer in other parts of the country and other parts of the world who survive far less. They are even having babies without (*gasp*) electric swings and convertible car seats and disposable diapers. More money, more problems.

We're stretching thin these days too, but stopping to be thankful for our health, our family and our home goes a long way. You're not alone - don't stress and it will all work out!

nital · November 2010

so not alone. i found a stroller, carseat, and pack'n'play i like online for way cheaper than babies r us...and the total bill is high enough that i can't make myself actually order it. we can afford it...but i'm cheap and it kills me to spend that much. with my medical issues, holidays coming up, my SIL having a baby as well, not being able to teach next semester (i'm an adjunct professor, and i just won't be teaching in the spring), replacing one of our cars recently, and needing to replace the other one soon....thinking about finances makes me want to puke.

globetrotting7 · November 2010

We don't do Christmas presents in my family at all, only for niece and nephew and my grandma. I have never understood the big ordeal with Christamas shopping for complete useless items just to have the person return it the next day.... it's about family time and your religion.

As far as baby stuff goes, the buying aspect, half the stuff that's out there no one really needs. All you need is a place for the baby to sleep. A stroller, diapers, wipes, bottles, butt cream, and that's it. All the fancy crap is just marketing to get you to spend money and go all baby crazy with your nursery. Don't get stressed out, think about the basics the baby needs, he has you and your husband, you both have good, stable jobs, and can provide financially and most emotionally for the baby.

zoemeral · November 2010

DH and I are both grad students, so we are living on his doctoral stipend and my PT job leasing apartments. I'm trying not to worry too much because money always works itself out somehow and, like my parents say, "You can always somehow afford a child." My parents are VERY strongly against the idea of me going back to work before the baby is a year old, though. Yeah, right, we're all three gonna live in a major city on an $800 biweekly stipend check from the university! We have some savings, but we are hoarding them for summer because there is no guarantee the university will be able to give him work then. My brother just went back to work after being a stay-at-home dad for the first several months and my parents are livid about it. I'm seriously dreading the guilt trips already.

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