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my little whiney post

tSquared1987tSquared1987
in Preemies

Yesterday was a great day. My mom held Taylen for the first time yesterday. I got to spend 7 hours with the boys alone which is what I needed the most.

Today, has been the complete opposite. What a crappy day.  

I couldn't go to the hospital today, had sooo much to do at home. I called to check on the boys and Taylen was put back on his nasal cannula and caffeine. Tage and Taylen both were having more destats than usual. Tage was up to 16 "episodes" today. His highest before that was 9 last Wednesday.

They are thinking that since they are  just starting to learn how to eat from a bottle, that it can be wearing them out and making the episodes more frequent.

I just want them home and healthy.... Seeing the empty nursery is breaking me down. They are almost a month old now, and I feel robbed of that time. It's so weird that I have to ask someone to hold my kids. NICU TIME SUCKS.

Sorry for the little vent/whiney post. Just needed to get some stuff out and you ladies are the only ones that get where I'm coming from.

 

 

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Re: my little whiney post

  • lgmom2010lgmom2010
    Awe I know it's totally unfair and totally sucks! The days in the nicu are rough...it feels like one day you take a step forward and the next you take 10 steps back....I remember crying every night on our way home from the nicu and sitting in DD's room pumping in the middle of the night just holding her blankets and crying....you are at a point where it is just like "when will this end?!" I remember that time...it's a hump you will get over and you will see the light at the end of the tunnel soon! Try to do something relaxing for yourself and get some extra rest. Hang in there mommy! It will all be over soon!
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  • hollerjeepgirlhollerjeepgirl member
    Feel free to vent! It's a crappy situation but you're doing a great job. Your boys are SO cute btw :)
    Jackson W. Holler born 12/9/10 at 7:52 a.m. He is my little miracle baby!! pPROM'ed at 23w1d and delivered at 34w Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
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  • MeL2185MeL2185

    I totally understand. It is so hard when you are in those moments. There is lights at the end of those tunnels. I was riding by our hospital this past weekend and relived all the NICU days and just got this horrible feeling remembering how hard it was.. soo soo hard. it does get easier and better I promise! Hang on and u will be writing this post for someone else really soon.

     

     

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  • lemen99lemen99 member
    I'm sorry. I hope tomorrow is better.  The bad days are so hard.
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  • Kate621Kate621 member
    ((hugs))
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  • sdtchica13sdtchica13 member

    Awww, hang in there mama, the whole NICU experience sucks! We were in the NICU with Corri for 63 days, and the last 33 days of that were basically a waiting game for bottle feeding. It's extremely frustrating when all you want is for them to be able to take a bottle without desating or bradying!

    The nurses in my NICU said bottle feeding is the most difficult part because preemies never got to the suck-swallow-breathe breathe part of their development prior tp being born, but that one day it will just click. Thats what happened with us; she went from barely taking half of a bottle every other feeding to suddenly taking everything at every feeding. It will happen, I promise!

    Big ((hugs))

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  • beyogabeyoga member
    I totally agree.  Last night I started having vomiting and diarrhea.  I still feel sick so I know I can't go tomorrow.  I actually took Monday off to do some stuff so it will be Thanksgiving at the earliest before I see my big guy.  I hope he doesn't think I've abandoned him.  I usually see him every day.  And I get tired of asking permission to hold my son.  I just want to hold my baby!
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  • tSquared1987tSquared1987

    imagebeyoga:
    I totally agree.  Last night I started having vomiting and diarrhea.  I still feel sick so I know I can't go tomorrow.  I actually took Monday off to do some stuff so it will be Thanksgiving at the earliest before I see my big guy.  I hope he doesn't think I've abandoned him.  I usually see him every day.  And I get tired of asking permission to hold my son.  I just want to hold my baby!

     

    all of this. I don't know how much longer I can take of this crap. it SUCKS.

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