Does/did anyone feel left out on things....

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

while pregnant? I feel that I don't get invited to do things that much anymore with friends because I'm pregnant. And mainly I think that because I can't go out and drink. It may be me throwing a pitty party for myself and it sounds really immature for me to even think this, but it really sucks.

**ok, pitty party fest over**

MrsNJSwimmer · November 2010

pity party away!

I think it was mainly me declining stuff b/c a) I couldn't drink and b) I was just so darn tired! Maybe you can suggest/organize something to let them know you still want to hang out?

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

MrsNJSwimmer:

Maybe you can suggest/organize something to let them know you still want to hang out?

That's a good idea! I didn't realize until I was PG that everything sorda revolves around drinking when hanging out w/ family and friends Tongue Tied Oopsies!

MrsZiz · November 2010

When I was pregnant with Bella most of the girls I worked with went out and were always drinking. I was rarely invited. Then everyone started having babies and now we do playdates with our kids at rotating houses. It's really fun! I'm sure it sounds lame to some but it's nice to have mama's over with their LO's and talk about everything and anything! It helps that the mama's I hang out with are very open minded too.

It's still hard though because everything when I'm off revolves around nap time which is a PITA. Bella gets up at 7, goes back to nap at 8:30 and naps for about 1-1 1/2 hours. Then we play, eat lunch and nap again from 1230-2... so there's not much time between naps and eating!

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

MrsZiz:
When I was pregnant with Bella most of the girls I worked with went out and were always drinking. I was rarely invited. Then everyone started having babies and now we do playdates with our kids at rotating houses. It's really fun! I'm sure it sounds lame to some but it's nice to have mama's over with their LO's and talk about everything and anything! It helps that the mama's I hang out with are very open minded too.

It's still hard though because everything when I'm off revolves around nap time which is a PITA. Bella gets up at 7, goes back to nap at 8:30 and naps for about 1-1 1/2 hours. Then we play, eat lunch and nap again from 1230-2... so there's not much time between naps and eating!

Yeah, I guess I'm just having a hard time knowing that I'm not really invited to much anymore or people don't want to hang out with me because I'm not drinking. For instance, my SIL and I hang out a lot and she has 2 kids of her own and might be trying for a 3rd and I consistently invite her and BIL to hang out on the weekends and she usually declines because she is going out with other friends and hang out so they can obviously drink. My BIL ends up coming to our house w/out her with their kids. It's so frustrating and it makes me feel left out and awkward. I know it seems like such high school drama, but I can't help but feel hurt. I guess I can be using this time to focus on creating my own happiness and have fun with the decorating, shopping and the fun stuff for LO but I still can't get it out of my mind. ugh

MrsZiz · November 2010

MauiBride2008:
MrsZiz:
When I was pregnant with Bella most of the girls I worked with went out and were always drinking. I was rarely invited. Then everyone started having babies and now we do playdates with our kids at rotating houses. It's really fun! I'm sure it sounds lame to some but it's nice to have mama's over with their LO's and talk about everything and anything! It helps that the mama's I hang out with are very open minded too.

It's still hard though because everything when I'm off revolves around nap time which is a PITA. Bella gets up at 7, goes back to nap at 8:30 and naps for about 1-1 1/2 hours. Then we play, eat lunch and nap again from 1230-2... so there's not much time between naps and eating!
Yeah, I guess I'm just having a hard time knowing that I'm not really invited to much anymore or people don't want to hang out with me because I'm not drinking. For instance, my SIL and I hang out a lot and she has 2 kids of her own and might be trying for a 3rd and I consistently invite her and BIL to hang out on the weekends and she usually declines because she is going out with other friends and hang out so they can obviously drink. My BIL ends up coming to our house w/out her with their kids. It's so frustrating and it makes me feel left out and awkward. I know it seems like such high school drama, but I can't help but feel hurt. I guess I can be using this time to focus on creating my own happiness and have fun with the decorating, shopping and the fun stuff for LO but I still can't get it out of my mind. ugh

I always invite my SIL over here too, she has two small girls (ages 22months and 9 months) and I think it'd be nice to hang out with all the girls and just chat. She's younger than me (22) but she's a BIG homebody! Sometimes people are at different places in their lives. I've had pity parties for sure... mostly WTH am I ganna do with two small kids and how will I do things that I want/need to do... like run a quick errand to the craft store (haha like I'll have time for crafting with TWO of them!). Also I've thought, will I still have my sanity with two under two? I'm going with NO

On a side note, I love your nursery furniture. Have you thought about paint colors or any other decorating stuff? I'm heading to Hancock Fabric today, I usually go to JoAnn's to see if they have any of that material of the pillow (the stripped one), I LOVE it! We'll see. I have a shade of blue picked out for the walls, I was going to do that shade if it was a boy or girl and I really love it. But we still have TONS to do, like clean out the room so we can even start doing anything in there!

inamra · November 2010

MrsNJSwimmer:
pity party away!

I think it was mainly me declining stuff b/c a) I couldn't drink and b) I was just so darn tired! Maybe you can suggest/organize something to let them know you still want to hang out?

This! My friends still invited me out but I would decline often (definitely if it involved clubbing/etc) but I never drank before I was pg (I'm allergic) so it was sorta the same pre-pg except I had a big belly and couldn't have sushi. I did appreciate them inviting me at least, so I can understand how it may feel left out to not get invited in the first place, even if you don't intend to go. They may have assumed that they shouldn't inconvenience you with having to decline all their outings that involve drinking and they may also feel bad for "enticing" you with drinking outings when you can't drink. If you prefer to be invited, I think the idea of organizing something is the best thing to do to show them you're still up for hanging out.

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

MrsZiz:
MauiBride2008:
MrsZiz:
When I was pregnant with Bella most of the girls I worked with went out and were always drinking. I was rarely invited. Then everyone started having babies and now we do playdates with our kids at rotating houses. It's really fun! I'm sure it sounds lame to some but it's nice to have mama's over with their LO's and talk about everything and anything! It helps that the mama's I hang out with are very open minded too.

It's still hard though because everything when I'm off revolves around nap time which is a PITA. Bella gets up at 7, goes back to nap at 8:30 and naps for about 1-1 1/2 hours. Then we play, eat lunch and nap again from 1230-2... so there's not much time between naps and eating!

Yeah, I guess I'm just having a hard time knowing that I'm not really invited to much anymore or people don't want to hang out with me because I'm not drinking. For instance, my SIL and I hang out a lot and she has 2 kids of her own and might be trying for a 3rd and I consistently invite her and BIL to hang out on the weekends and she usually declines because she is going out with other friends and hang out so they can obviously drink. My BIL ends up coming to our house w/out her with their kids. It's so frustrating and it makes me feel left out and awkward. I know it seems like such high school drama, but I can't help but feel hurt. I guess I can be using this time to focus on creating my own happiness and have fun with the decorating, shopping and the fun stuff for LO but I still can't get it out of my mind. ugh

On a side note, I love your nursery furniture. Have you thought about paint colors or any other decorating stuff? I'm heading to Hancock Fabric today, I usually go to JoAnn's to see if they have any of that material of the pillow (the stripped one), I LOVE it! We'll see. I have a shade of blue picked out for the walls, I was going to do that shade if it was a boy or girl and I really love it. But we still have TONS to do, like clean out the room so we can even start doing anything in there!

Oh my goodness!! If you find that fabric let me know! I have been on the hunt for it and can't find it anywhere (well online only, I haven't ventured out to the fabric store quite yet). I found the Starfish pillow, but it's like $40...EEEK! I went for some paint samples yesterday. I got a sample of Sherwin Williams Tidewater and Rainwashed (although I think this might be too gray for the room). Blue is always so hard Tidewater is more of an aqua so it might match great with the nursery idea, I will let you know! I realized when I got home I had no paint brushes to paint the samples on the walls so I have to go do that today. I'm thinking in the next few weeks I'm going to start painting and stuff, but I was planning on doing the board and battan first in the nursery (hopefully before the furniture comes). I'm thinking of making a starfish mobile to put over his crib or changing dresser. I got a bunch of starfish from Oriental Trading Co to see if I can fiddle around with it to make one...wish me luck! I still have to revamp my step-daughters room which we plan to paint and decorate this weekend. After that, we clean out the junk in the nursery and start working on that...so much to be done...geesh!

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

inamra:
MrsNJSwimmer:

pity party away!

I think it was mainly me declining stuff b/c a) I couldn't drink and b) I was just so darn tired! Maybe you can suggest/organize something to let them know you still want to hang out?

This! My friends still invited me out but I would decline often (definitely if it involved clubbing/etc) but I never drank before I was pg (I'm allergic) so it was sorta the same pre-pg except I had a big belly and couldn't have sushi. I did appreciate them inviting me at least, so I can understand how it may feel left out to not get invited in the first place, even if you don't intend to go. They may have assumed that they shouldn't inconvenience you with having to decline all their outings that involve drinking and they may also feel bad for "enticing" you with drinking outings when you can't drink. If you prefer to be invited, I think the idea of organizing something is the best thing to do to show them you're still up for hanging out.

I didn't even look at it like this, thank you I need to stop being so overly sensitive and just realize that I can't do all the things I used to before I was PG...and that's ok! I'm such a Sensitive Sally so I hate when this kind of stuff bothers me.

I did just think of starting a book club so that might be a fun way to get together with the girls. They can still drink there wine, but having the book club is something we can all enjoy. Hopefully that will work out

kinibruin · November 2010

ugh.

yeah i feel left out a lot. but i think part of that is because i have so many freaking restrictions. the latest is the travel restrictions. so i've been bummed out that i can't even drive down to la. boo.

but on the bright side, 6 months down. 3 more to go!

MauiBride2008 · November 2010

kinibruin:

but on the bright side, 6 months down. 3 more to go!

That's a great bright side!!!

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