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MrsBlayne
member
Nanny questions
MrsBlayne
member
My nanny is due in Jan, and told us she would work through Dec. I went ahead and started looking again because I didn't want to leave it to the last minute, and we have gotten quite a few replies. The last sitter we had before the current one was fantastic, but after one week she got an offer to be a director of a daycare and took it (understandably). That is not working out and she said she wants to come watch Briley again. I know she will do a great job but will she get a better offer in a few weeks again? Should I go with her knowing that I may be searching again soon? Or go with someone else who may or may not do as good of job, but will hopefully be long term? (But we still can't know for sure?). That is issue number one.
Issue number two is that I have several people ready to start right away and one in two weeks. How do I handle this with the current girl? I'm not completely in love with her so I would just as soon have the new person go ahead and start, and the people we interviewed are pretty interested in starting. I just have this (probably irrational) fear that the sitter won't want to do anything once we give her notice. But I think it is probably too sketchy not to give her any... I'm not sure how to handle it.
Ok third and final dilemma. This one is a little easier. One girl we were supposed to meet with today sent us a message that she just realized she didn't have any gas. Um, no. We heard that line before with our first sitter and it did not end well. Would you just give her a polite no thanks or explain why? Thanks for reading all this and TIA for any input. You just earned yourself a cupcake.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Nanny questions
You have just had the worst luck with this nanny stuff! Hopefully once you get a new one she'll be reliable and stick around. I've never hired anyone before, but this is really a boss/employee issue if you think about it. Here's my opinion:
Issue #1 - I would probably not rehire the old nanny. If she's left before, and you aren't offering a significant pay increase, I don't see any reason why she wouldn't keep looking. I say unless you had an honest, heart-to-heart with her about your concerns, and what it would take for her to stay at least a year, I wouldn't bother.
Issue #2 - I do think it's fair to give your current nanny 2 weeks notice, so I wouldn't hire anyone to start sooner than that. I don't know where your current nanny got the idea that she decides when her last day is, but 2 weeks notice is acceptable. She obviously knows you are looking for a new person, so it won't be a surprise. If you are feeling generous, let her stay until the end of December and just work out something with the new girl if she'll accept it.
Issue #3 - These people and no gas money can NOT be serious! This is a full time job. They wouldn't pull this at a "real" interview, so they shouldn't do it with you if they're hoping to work for you. I think the minimum response to this girl is, "Sorry, we interviewed someone else who worked out so we went with her." But if it were ME, I'd also add, "For future reference, most parents take hiring a nanny very seriously and it doesn't reflect well on yourself when you can't make it to the interview. I'm sorry we didn't get to meet you and see if you would have gotten along with our little girl. Good luck on your job search."
Sorry that was such a long response, but I hope it helped! Either way, you're the boss so you call the shots!
That is well worded - thank you!
Dude, seriously, your luck with these nannies sucks bad. I have seen anything like it. At least you know Briley is well adjusted, lol.
Issue #1: Unlike Katie, I would for sure hire the first Nanny, but I would absolutely explain your concerns to her - that she'll go ahead and take another job on you again. But, at the same time, even if she DOES wind up getting another offer, you've at least had a couple of weeks with someone awesome watching Briley with a no-brainer hire in between - that's how I'd think about it.
Issue #2 - I wouldn't let anyone start until you give your current at least a week's notice, if not two. It's just not fair, even thought I totally understand wanting to get rid of her if you're not in love with her.
Issue #3 - I would not be as tactful as Katie - I would say something like "if you cannot be responsible enough to make sure you have gas in your car before an interview, there is no way in hell you're watching my kid." I would not have the patience for politeness after all you've been through with these nannies!
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This is perfectly fine to do as long as you give her a week or two notice.
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Issue numero uno - Explain your concerns to the nanny. See when she can start and see if she can make some kind of commitment. But the reality is, I probably wouldn't hire her since she left you high and dry last time. And she apparently set you up with this not so great second nanny.
Issue numero dos - If you find someone early, you can give your nanny two weeks notice. The sad truth - it is all business in the end.
Issue numero tres - oh lord. I wouldn't even lie. Just say, "thanks for applying but we are going to continue looking." She is ridic.
You will find a good nanny!! It makes me so sad that so many nannies suck.
Bummer on the nanny issues...but here's my thoughts.
1. Hire the old nanny if none of the others are worth anything. If you think one of them would be great long term (but not fabulous like old nanny), then I'd go with new nanny. It depends on who is in the running.
2. I think this depends on the legal situation. Are you doing stuff above board and paying her unemployment and such? If so, will firing her before she's saying she quits subject her to getting unemployment? I treat my nanny like I do my legal assistant. And frankly if I terminate someone from my practice, they are gone that day, but I am subject to unemployment for both the legal assistant and nanny positions. Very few employees in my experience, do a whole lot after you terminate them before they want to leave. You throw money out the window, I think.
3. Say I don't think it will work out. I had a few flakes too and could not believe it. Ones who rescheduled constantly because of their other jobs or whatever and asked the most inane questions. I cannot believe who is out there and I'm wondering if these folks are actually getting jobs somewhere else????
OK, this is coming from a girl who worked as a nanny in NYC for many years...
I would go with the one you had before. You know she was working out and you know her passion is child care so you know she will give Briley lots of attention. I would just ask her to give you at least two week's notice before moving on if possible. Most employers will let you start two weeks after being hired so you can leave your previous job with enough warning in good standing so hopefully, next time, this will work out. And even though you know she may leave at any time that can actually be a good thing. Coming from a nanny's perspective, I think switching every few months is a good thing for Briley because then she doesn't get too attached to someone else and she can also be exposed to different people.
For the current girl can you give her two week's notice? Just let her know that you needed to change arrangements or say a family member is able to take over. I wasn't ever let go from a family but some of those in my nannying circle have been and that seems to be the norm. It seems very common that "a family member steps up to help out".
As for the one who didn't have gas... first of all, how do you not realize you don't have gas and why can't you just go buy more? Sounds extremely irresponsible to me. And I would be worried you'd hear that again and again and always be late because she forgot to get gas. So I would just tell her that you have decided on someone else, especially since it seems you have other options..