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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
SAHM--do you consider it a job?
do you consider being a stay at home mom a job?
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Natural M/C : Arabella's Twin Guardian Angel, 7.29.2009.**Natural M/C : 2.20.2010.
18 weeks. Always Loved. 4 weeks.
Natural M/C : Arabella's Twin Guardian Angel, 7.29.2009.**Natural M/C : 2.20.2010.
18 weeks. Always Loved. 4 weeks.This discussion has been closed.
Re: SAHM--do you consider it a job?
In what sense do you mean?
I really don't consider it a job. I don't work nearly as hard/long as DH does. I can do things at my own pace on my own time, and there's no pressure or deadlines.
Yes I do. I take care of all the kids, clean the house, take care of the animals, manage all the finances, do all the shopping, do the majority of the cooking...
His job lasts 8-9 hours a day... mine is a 24/7 job with very little alone time (thank god for naps).
The Triplet Life Store
this is how i meant it...
DH said today that i was unemployed, that being a SAHM isnt a job.
it hurt my feelings, because i do everything here with the baby, with the house, with the food.
I wouldn't say unemployed, but when people ask what I do we both say I don't work. When we're talking to people who don't know we have kids we'll say I am a SAHM. When talking to people who know we have kids, I don't need to clarify. I just say I don't work.
But, technically, you are unemployed, even if by choice.
Sometimes they don't really understand everything that is involved. We may not be going away and working in another environment but being a SAHM is work.
I am lucky in the fact that my DH worked from home when the babies were born and the first 5 months. He got to see first hand what my days were like, what I did all day, and he appreciates everything I do.
Does he do everything on his days off? If not perhaps you should arrange to spend a day out and let him do all the things you normally would. Maybe it would help him see what you do.
The Triplet Life Store
It depends on the day! On a good day, it doesn't feel like work. But on bad days, I wish I could clock out at 5pm!
I've worked full-time and now I'm a SAHM and even though I feel like I do a lot around the house, I don't feel like it's a "job". I guess it's just your own personal perspective on what your responsibilities are versus what they would be if you were working outside the home.
I consider myself unemployed. I also think that how hard I work depends on the day.
But DH will tell anyone who asks that my "job" is harder than his. In fact, I teased him on Saturday about whether he was ready to switch and stay home with the kids while I go back to work. There was TERROR in the man's eyes.
My advice to any SAHM whose husband doesn't appreciate her is to take off for a most of a Saturday and let the dad handle everything for a day.
I was thinking this when someone mentioned the above list also. The only difference is while I'm at work a SAHM is also. It's not like the kid naps from 6-4. A daycare/nanny would be a job, correct? It's almost the same thing.
I also can honestly say that my job is easier than staying home with Z. I punch numbers all day (accounting), bump, chat with co-workers and the hardest part is the pumping. My job is pretty laid back. If I was at home I would have an endless list of things to run around and do.
I have heard from other SAHM's on here that their husbands say similar things. I just can't imagine how you tolerate that. If my husband said something like that to me - I would kick him in the teeth.
My husband works full-time but has a pretty kick-back office job (most days) and is able to watch t.v. shows, online, play games, etc., in between doing his work. He can take breaks when he wants to, go to the bathroom when he wants to, etc.
I work part-time from home, take care of our child, do what I can with the house, meal-planning, shopping, pay all the bills and am pregnant with our second.
However - Even if all I did was take care of DS, I'm still doing a full-time job. There is no quitting time and if you don't take breaks (like naptime), you'd go nuts.
Seriously, if my husband EVER said anything like that to me, I'd consider it a sign that we were having a major problem in our marriage.
Perhaps I should phrase something different... a job is work... being a SAHM is work. I have worked outside of the home for almost all my life until the triplets. The work may be different but it is still work. I have two older children, was a single working parent, and it was all work... just a different kind.
The Triplet Life Store
It is a job but I don't think of myself as "employed." I've probably even said I don't work, I stay at home with DS. I mean, right now I'm sitting in my PJ's with my feet up Bumping and watching The View. I hardly put myslef on the same level as moms that work outside the home. KWIM?
I should note that DS is napping right now...LOL.
Our family blog
I don't call it a job because I don't get paid. But is it work? Yes! Is it work that's as hard as my DH's job? Yes! I guess I'm lucky because my DH totally appreciates what I do.
Working and being a SAHM both have their advantages and disadvantage. Advantage: I'm in my PJs right now. DH had to get up and shower and put on a suit and tie. Disadvantage: In 30 minutes, DH is going to go grab lunch and eat in peace while he reads the paper. I'm going to shovel some warmed up leftovers in my mouth in between shoveling pureed sweet potatoes into the mouth of one kid and constantly trying to keep the other seated at the table instead of running around. Some days he catches a break - an afternoon client "meeting" on a golf course. Some days I catch the break - kids that take 3 hours naps that allow me to watch some TV and take a quick nap.
He doesn't want to stay at home. I don't want to work. We're both doing what we want and we totally appreciate that what each is doing is hardwork. We're both contributing to making this family work.
How very thoughtful of him.
IMO, being a SAHM isnt a "job" but it certainly is WORK. To me (and to most people) being unemployed implies that you are actively looking for employment and being home is just what you have to do until you find another job.
Perfectly said! I work about 32 hrs a week, 24 are in my office and about 8-10 are from home. I get to see both aspects. Sometimes I wish I could stay home in my PJ's and spend time with ds and do my chores with no worries, other days I love the break and the fact that I can nap during my lunch and no one can bother me!
I think it's a lot of work, but I don't think it's a job.
DH will be the first to tell anyone my days are harder and more challenging than his ever will be as an engineer. I feel really good that he acknowledges the everyday struggles that SAHMs endure.
Although it is a lot of work and there are days where I just want to be by myself once DH gets home, I find on a day to day basis my life is full of joy and fun which totally makes all of the work worth it.