- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
Babies: 9 - 12 Months
abbzy85
member
Edit Controversial *Religion* based UO
abbzy85
member
I never write these but I thought of this recently.
When people have interfaith weddings, and their religion dictates that you many NOT marry outside your faith, I think it is in poor taste to find an "easy going" minister/preacher/faith leader to lead a religious wedding service. Either you follow your religion, marry in your faith and have a religious ceremony or you don't follow your religion, marry outside your faith and have a non-religious ceremony. I hate when people try to find priests or pastors who will be easygoing and break the rules. If you are not following the guidelines of your faith, what's the need for the religious ceremony? Clearly you don't really believe in it. And I definitely don't believe the whole love has no eyes garbage because if you were really religious, you wouldn't be looking outside your faith.I am religious, married in my faith and would not have considered looking outside. And if I had met that perfect person, they would have to convert. It's not optional.
Mind you, I have no problem whatsoever of interfaith marriages,interracial, or even gay marriages.I only care about people pretending to follow a faith and actually trampling on it's belief system under the guise of a "religious" wedding ceremony and the guidance of an easygoing faith leader.
I actually have to leave for school now, so I won't be checking this for a while. Just curious to see if anyone else agrees or everyone will be all up in arms.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Edit Controversial *Religion* based UO
I don't know...Just like political parties, just because I may label myself one thing doesn't mean that I agree 100% with everything that party says and does.
I used to work at a Catholic Archdiocese. I don't remember exactly what it was, but in the Vatican, there is an office of Christian relations or something to that effect, that works with different denominations, and judaism is part of that office, not the non-christian faiths, because they see Christianity as stemming from the Jewish faith. If you look, there are a lot of similarities in the traditions and history.
I now work at a Methodist church and am still Catholic. I am a member at a Catholic church. I don't feel like I'm disrespecting any faith by doing so.
Even though I seem to always end up working at churches, I'm not very religious. I believe faith and religion are two very different things. Faith is your belief system, your core values. Religion is how people choose to show their faith. I don't think God cares what sign is on the building where you worship, or even if you worship, but more how you treat others and live your life.
twitter: @aliciamariel
I agree with you and I was a BM in a wedding where this was an issue.
My friend who was Catholic was very upset that she would not be able to get married in the Catholic Church. Why? Because the guy she was marrying was JEWISH. I mean, its not like she didn't know it was going to be an issue. They found a priest and rabbi to marry them in a secular setting and the ceremony was great, but she just kept complaining that she didn't "get the church wedding she always dreamed of."
BFP #2: 11/16/11: M/C at 7 weeks
BFP #3: 03/24/12: C/P 03/28/12
BFP #4: 04/26/12: please be our baby
I don't really care either way. I think "faith" is much more personal than the church or organized religion someone belongs to. So, I assume that people who do this just do not agree with that aspect of their religion.
Disagree. I am Catholic and it was very important for me to be married in my church. My husband is not Catholic and not a baptized Christian (gasp!). We were married in a Catholic church and the priest was just fine with it. I didn't "trample" on my religion by doing so. If your religion truly dictates that your are not to marry outside your faith, then there wouldn't be a priest that would do it.
I grew up in an LDS family and was baptized, DH is not strictly religious, but is fond of buddhism. I wouldn't say it's my faith though, but it's my parents faith and it would have been a huge headache to deal with my parents so to appease everyone, we did the wedding in a chapel specifically for weddings (church is no longer held in the building) and had my parents Bishop marry us.
Who cares anyways, your salvation is not theirs. God will "judge" them if he thinks he needs to because they disobey their faith.
I understand where you're coming from, but maybe I'll come at it from a different angle. For myself, marrying a Christian (and I'll go as far as to say a practicing, protestant Christian) was first and foremost when I was dating. My husband felt the same way. We also know that when our sons start to date, as long as they are living in our household, they will date Christian girls. But that's personal to us. I'm not going to put my personal convictions off on someone else.
The only time your UO really crushes my cookies is when people who married outside their faith complain later about how their spouse doesn't agree with raising their child in a faith-specific way. That's when I have to give the
and say, "Umm, what did you expect?" I think too many people marry outside of their faith and think everything will just work itself out when the children arrive. If you have specific convictions about how you want your children raised, you best clear that stuff up ahead of time. That includes many things, religion being one of them.