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Afraid to tell someone

tifvolleytifvolley member
in Postpartum Depression

I know what I'm feeling has to be some sort of PPD or PPOCD, but I can't say it out loud.  I'm afraid that if I even speak the words, I'll spiral down a path of crazy.  Not to mention telling someone the scary thoughts in my head.  I don't think about harming anyone, but just the what if's and I feel like an awful mother.  No matter how hard I try, they play over and over. 

DH told me he's worried about me, but that he doesn't believe in PPD.  All day yesterday, I just wanted to scream at everyone "help me" and was asking God for someone to recognize what's going on.  I don't want to get out of bed today.  I don't want to pick up DD or look DS in the eyes, because I don't want them to see what kind of mother I am.  I can't breath. 

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Re: Afraid to tell someone

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    jaime5121jaime5121

    I know the feeling.  Admitting it is the scariest part.  But I can tell you this much - once I did, boy did I feel better.  I felt like this huge weight had been lifted off my chest.  I felt like I could focus on getting better because I didn't have to act anymore.  I didn't have to cover up that I was sick.  PPD is a REAL medical condition.  Perhaps your DH needs to go to your Dr's appt with you.  PLEASE, call your Dr.  You don't need to keep feeling like this. 

    I was diagnosed with PPD and PP OCD.  I didn't even tell my DH that I had a Dr's appt until I had the appt and got my script for Zoloft filled.  I felt like a failure.  I felt like I should have been able to handle everything.  It wasn't that I could or couldn't handle everything - I had a medical condition.  If you have bronchitis, you would go to the Dr.  This isn't any different. 

    Please, call your Dr. immediately.  Your children need you.  You need you.

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    melissawillrmelissawillr member
    I can be here with you today if you need someone to lean on while getting some help.  If you can't call and talk to your dr, can someone call for you?  Clearily DH isn't really an option since he doesn't believe in PPD, (which is unfortunate.)  I'm battling this myself and don't like to actually say it outloud either.  I was able to call my drs office and talk to my nurse, we adjusted some medications and I feel like someone is looking in on me, which helps.  I often try to lean on friends during difficult times.  I like to have someone to touch bases with mid-day or in the morning if I'm struggling to get out of bed.  It's baby steps at this point.  I'm up, showered, put contacts in, back in pjs because I'm not leaving the house today, (that I know of,) and now I'm trying to figure out what the next step is.  PM me if you want to chat.
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    SaraMaeHeinickSaraMaeHeinick

    Oh mommy. Your post made me want to help you too! Is there anything I can do? Or any of us can do?

    Please feel free to PM any of us. Take a deep breath! It is baby steps as pp said.

    If your hubby isn't an option is their anyone else? My hubby didn't get it at first either and that was my breaking point. I know how it feels. I know exactly what you are feeling.

    PM me. I'm here. Or facebook me facebook.com/sheinicklacher. I can add you as a friend and we can chat on the IM.

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    Mich411Mich411 member
    Sweetie, take care of yourself first so you can take care of your baby!  I want you to know that you are not alone.  Post here or PM as often as you need to for support.  We are all here with you and know what you are going through!  Please take the first step and call your doc for an appointment.
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    lilhotcandie69lilhotcandie69 member

    Its nothing to be ashamed of. Your hormones are outta wack. Remember you had a baby after carrying it for 9 months and taking care of it.

    Stay strong and don't be afraid to get help. Your not alone.

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    Jess2007Jess2007
    I havent posted on here much but my son is now almost 4 months old and I felt the same exact way as you in the beginning!  All I have to say is try to get in with your Dr.  like others have said, once you are diagnosed and you get some help you will feel 1 million times better.  Don't be embarrased!  PPD and PPOCD is a medical condition and there is treatmner that helps a lot!  If you need anything please feel free to PM me as well. 
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    BlairWaldorfBlairWaldorf member

    How are you doing today?

    email me if you like - blairbear111 at gmail

    I have definitely been in your shoes & know how helpless you feel, but believe me, you will survive this.  You are an amazing mother just by recognizing that something feels off.

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