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Baby Showers
Children attending?
I'm leaning toward asking my BF to indicate that my shower will be an adult only affair. Is anyone having a shower with children attending? Is there anything wrong with not wanting kids there?
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Re: Children attending?
I am sorry but I really don't understand the reason why you would not want children at your baby shower? I can understand not wanting children at a bridal shower, but not a baby shower. I know that a lot of my friends would be put off it I told them they could not bring there children.
This
I've never been to a baby shower where kids were invited. I don't see the correlation between "baby shower" and "oh, all kids are invited".
A baby shower is for ONE baby, and I absolutely see it as an adult event, just as a wedding shower is.
So, no, there isn't anything wrong w/ not wanting kids there.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Partly because the invite list is already up to 45 people. Throw children in there and we are looking close to 60 guests. That's a bit much I think and it seems like it would be rather chaotic. These children are toddlers and preschoolers.
Ok, that makes sense.
The only other thing I'd say is if there are any nursing moms invited, is it ok for them to bring their babies?
Toddlers and preschoolers? I dont' find showers appropriate for that age, much less if you're talking many kids. That is the age where they want to be the ones opening the gifts, etc.
Some people think it's cute. Others don't. And I think kids getting involved in the opening is only going to make it take longer, and w/ 45 people, that's a lot of gifts to get through.
As a guest, I'd be annoyed if the gift opening took forever because a bunch of kids were involved.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Oh absolutely...unless you're nursing a 3 year old. I find that a bit odd.
That's what I was thinking. My BF said her niece would be horrified (she's 6) if she wasn't at my shower. I thought that was slightly dramatic. It's my first baby, my mother's first grandchild. I kind of want the focus to be on us. Sorry if that sounds selfish.
I can understand wanting to keep the number of guest down. I think that if you do ask your BF to do this make sure that your word it right to not upset anyone. And even if you do ask people to not bring there children you should expect that someone might.
This exactly.
And I don't think it's selfish. That's why I don't like kids at these kinds of events. The focus does turn to the kids. IT's not about them - it's about you.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
There is nothing wrong with it if that's your way of doing things or if you know the kids are older and/or rowdy. But, be prepared for people to not come for lack of a sitter, and for people to ignore the no kids rule.
Personally, I can't imagine not having kids at my shower. No, my 7 and 10 year old nephews won't be invited, but my family and friends' babies and toddlers are more than welcome. I enjoy having them around and really don't imagine them being a problem.
Personally, I think kids should be allowed at showers. That is, assuming of course, your friends/family know how to parent their children and they aren't going to be burning the house down.
I think being as the majority of people at most baby showers are mom's themselves, the occasional kid-behavior (such as the little kids wanting to help open a present) is forgiven.
Personally, I invited about a dozen little kids (by proxy of their mother) and I ended up with a one month old baby, a 3 year old boy and a 5 year old girl. The others either spent the afternoon with dad, giving mom a break, or mom couldn't come. However, I wouldn't have minded a bit having little kids there.
Fwiw: Yes, the 3 year old wanted to help open presents. I told him he could help me open 2, he could choose which ones. He chose two presents, he helped me and we moved on. Once again, imo, it falls back to the parents having the authority with the child to redirect or remind them of how they should act at a party.
He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be. He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.
i dont think showers are for kids. unless its stated they are invited.
i hate that everyone assumes thier kids are invited to everything.
when i have stuff at my house its typically no kids because i dont currently have anything to entertain kids. and showers at my house are the same.
It is tradition where I live to include that nursing babies are allowed, and female children are invited *if* their name is included on the invitation. I went to several showers as a child w/ my Mom and my name was always included on the invitation. It is a pet peeve of mine for people to think they should be able to take their children everywhere they go (OK, flame away for that comment....)
Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010
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Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012
Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks
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Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012. We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!
THIS. MIL and I went to a shower a couple of months ago with a note in the invite "Adults Only" and we thought it was perfect, so we included it in the invites for the shower she's hosting for me.
I'm hosting a baby shower in March when DD will be around 2 months, and I'm not planning on taking her. I don't see anything wrong with her 6 yr old niece hanging out with her dad a Saturday afternoon.
this.
My shower will most likely be held in a restaurant so a kid zone doesn't seem feasable. I like the idea of if children attend then only allowing them to pick one or two gifts to help open but I imagine that would be difficult to enforce. I want my guests to enjoy the shower, the food and the adult company without having to police their children. I told my BF that I would like it to be an adult only shower but to discuss it with my mother since they are both throwing the shower.
Thank you so much for all of your input. I do value different opinions.
I am not stating ?no kids? on the invites because I feel that is kind of rude; however I did ask the host to not to include children?s names on the invites because I really don?t want a bunch of kids at the shower. I know that if my daughter?s name is not on an invite I will not bring her unless I am explicitly told that she is invited; I am hoping that others will follow a similar etiquette. If kids show up I will not be heartbroken. I don?t mind older kids (12+) or newborns but I feel that when you have kids in between those ages it gets chaotic, no one can enjoy themselves and the kids are constantly messing with the gifts. There really isn?t a lot for kids to do at a shower and they tend to get bored and can act up as a result.
In my case we are doing the shower at a restauarant and the guestlist is already large, adding kids would just make it bigger.
I have no problem with adults only events, period. I don't get why people think their kids should get an automatic invite to everything. Just be prepared that some people won't come because of it.
That said, I do think that an exception for nursing moms is appropriate.
"This ribbon has been reported." - lovesnina
My aunts, BF & SIL are hosting a shower for me. I did include a few children's names on the invites- 3 were girls that I had taught for several years in church groups (two are teens & the other is 10yo) and an old friend's 8yo daughter. They are all well-behaved girls so I know they will be fine. I am hoping that none of the ones with younger children bring them as they could be difficult.
But I do not have a problem with saying no children if that is what you want. If your circle of friends includes lots of people with toddlers/pre-schoolers I can understand how that would make the event not as fun.
We left it open at my shower. One friend brought her daughter (she was breastfeeding, plus her husband had to work), one brought just her infant and left the older two at home (I had yet to see the newest and was excited to meet her) and my other friends were happy to leave their kids home with dad! They looked forward to having a glass of wine and chatting without having to keep an eye on their children.
Honestly, unless I have a portable infant, it is less of a hassle to leave the kid at home if at all possible.
What about finding a way to entertain the children away from the happenings of the party? Bouncy thing outside...? I know if I had kids & someone told me you can't bring the kids - why am I going to pay for a baby sitter AND buy you a gift?? I likely wouldn't come.
That's rude.
I can't recall there ever being children at showers I attended. Honestly, if there were, I'd probably think that the parent just "didn't know any better", as in no manners, not up on etiqutte.
I probably wouldn't feel comfortable noting "no children" or "adults only" on my invites, but we have chosen to hold showers that just aren't child friendly.
My female only shower will be at a fancier restaurant where kids just generally aren't too accepted, so I highly doubt any moms will bring theirs along. Plus, they are looking at it as a way to get out of the house for lunch and a couple glasses of champagne!
My second shower is co-ed, although I expect that the guys will be outside playing poker and drinking beer while the women do the gifts and traditional shower stuff, will be in the evening and as it's a couples shower with drinks, I doubt anyone will bring kids. Again, most folks see this as their adult time away from kids, I would think.